Break-up Help

[Deleted]

Actually, especially when they ask that. Always be honest, period. You don't say "hey, yeah, you do look fat in that!", but try to be a bit more bracing, but never lie. You'd want her to be honest with you.

OT: You're too young to be in any kind of relationship, especially a serious one! You should be just dating and banging for the next 5 - 10 years, then start maybe thinking about relationships around 30 or so. Get your life started so you don't look back and think "Damn! I wasted so much time on stupid shit that could have waited!"

Exactly my thoughts.
You may want to stay in that relationship, but you have tell her NOW you're too young to commit.
If she doesn't like the idea, it's better to quit the relationship, because you two have different goals for the near future. Meet other people, live your life.
Not to mention, being in a relation for 4 months is way too early to get married, in my opinion.

[mmx2]

When I want to break up with someone, I just ignore them. I stop answering their phone calls and just avoid them. It works really well especially if you live in a city. Last girlfriend I did that to because I found her flirting a little too much with my friends, and it worked really well.

That's what you do if your wuss who's too afraid to handle your business. It's also a good way to scar the poor girl and create a looney stalker.


If it's not what you want that's all you need to say to her in private then don't see each other for awhile, at least 6mo to a year for she'll very likely be emotional and any little stupid thing will make her think otherwise. Or she will attempt to kill you.

[Veliane]

We have only been together 4 months but she is already talking about getting married and stuff. I have been thinking lately that I might not want to do that. I mean we haven't really got to live our lives or even find ourselves. I want to break up with her but really can't find the words to say. I know that she will start crying at that's going to be the hardest part but in the long run I think it will be better for the both of us.Also, another factor to add in is that I work a 3rd shift job and will start working 7 days a week again soon and I think that might interfere with the relationship as well.. I would like to just be able to be free most of my twenties and just have fun while I can. Can anyone out there help who may have had a similar experience?

There is no help you can get here, you're young and immature to handle a relation and that caused the situation you found yourself into.

The purpose of a relationship isn't getting into it just because it was avaliable while "you're finding yourself". And when you do, bye! thanks for the memories..
Might aswell stay 'single' for that and still get action, nobody wants a breakup out of the blue and one day you could be getting the short stick.

Ditching her will break her trust and heart then you'll have to man up and handle what's to come (the crying, etc) and Greatly with a capital G, reducing any chance of getting back with her if you change your mind.

Hope next time you know what you're getting into when you decide to get a 'GF'.

[Snakeseye0]

Just tell here you don't want to get married so soon. Short and simple.

[BatteredRose]

I'm engaged. You never say yes to it. Ever.

I'm Married, for quite some time, and yes, you do.

My wife would rather I be honest and say "Maybe change that shirt" or "Try a different pair of pants" than lieing to her.

If you were getting ready to go out somewhere and you looked stupid, or fat, or w/e you would want her to tell you, no? I know I would.

You say no during courtship/engagement. Post marriage is when the honesty comes out. :P

[skrump]

I like her alot, I asked myself the same question and hesitated on answering it.

If you like her Don't let her go.

Playing the field is a lot of fun however in this day and age most women don't want to settle down until they have been drug through the mud by at least a few dozen men and their beauty has long faded away.

On a side note, you should tell her your concerns and that you would like to postpone even thinking about marriage for at least a few more years to make sure your relationship can withstand the test of time because you are against divorce and such a commitment isn't to be made lightly.

You essentially need to sound intellectual about it, worst case scenario is she is not willing to agree to those terms and she leaves you and you get to avoid feeling like a jackass.

[Deleted]

If its love, which you should feel in your heart and know when its really both ways, then you should just keep on trying. Love destroys everything. When you feel something is not right in the way a relationship should feel, you should cut it off. Just tell her whats on your mind and don't keep her on hold. Just be honest. Girls can feel when something is not right and that will only crush her more. Also, talking helps.

Talk to her and then make up your mind. Say to her that you need a few days alone (no msn/skype/phone or whatever!!), and depending how that conversation went, you make a decision. You might gonna miss her those days without contact, or you might not (there is your answer).