Why do you hide your gaming hobby from RL friends?

[WretchedSimmons]

The problem is not with the friends, it's with you. You've put so much time into it that you are ashamed of it. So, I think you should ask yourself if it defines you or not.

[endersblade]

Um, I didn't?

I've been a gamer geek since DOS/Atari. I've never hidden that fact. When I was in High School, in Texas, the belt buckle of the freaking bible belt, I and a friend used to play Magic in the cafeteria in the mornings, and at lunch when some of the people had cleared out (only because we needed the room). We got called devil worshipers, demons, possessed, all sorts of silly things that Christians believe. Whatever, who the fuck cares. I even tried starting a D&D club at the school, but the teachers shot the idea down 'for our protection'...or something. My senior year, I still managed to get a gathering of people who played D&D before and after school.

I DID, however, know of a lot of people who were serious gamers, but kept it hidden for fear of being picked on, etc. We were in a podunk Texas town, where everyone aspired to marry their HS sweetheart, take over their parent's farm, and spew out 800 kids. Computer geeks, gamers, homosexuals, people who believed the world was round, none of us were 'welcome' in this community. But I made damned sure people knew my interests, and welcomed anyone to try and challenge them.

Yes, I know, shit like this is perfectly normal now a days. My local HS apparently has clubs for Warhammer, D&D, MTG, Pokemon, and Yu-Gi-Oh. Grats. Being a gamer in the 80s and even into the 90s was not easy in certain places. But we broke ground for the newer generations to enjoy it :-)

[Libram]

I don't hide it lol. I like wearing shirts to some of the video games I play and someone go "Oh hey I play that game ."

[Fabled]

To my friends, we're all gamers, so no need to hide it there. With new people, if they ask, I tell. It's just a hobby after all, no need to act like it's the worst sin in the world.

[vazar_da_priest]

i recently joined a fraternity at a very large university. i find it best to keep my gaming to myself (especially wow), since my fraternity brothers will use anything and everything to make fun of each other.

[Callace]

Maybe you should wonder what hobbies they are hiding from you? Maybe they play games and you don't know about it.

[bekilrwale]

Hiding the fact that you're a gamer just sounds tedious to me so I tell my friends only if they ask what my hobbies are or what I did over the weekend. I don't come straight out and say I am a hardcore pc gamer, but I won't pretend bash gamers or pretend i'm not one. At some point in time all my friends learned I played WoW and they didn't care in the least bit. What I don't understand is why they wouldn't care if you were a gamer now, but you can't tell them. IMO be proud to be a gamer, in the end it is just a hobby and if you love it, don't hide it.

[Morsker]

I don't hide gaming, but I tell friends truthfully that I like the games but not the "gamer" culture, since it's fully of racism, misogyny, bullying, and excessive drug use. So gaming is generally the last thing I want to talk about around non-gamers; they're my welcome break from gamer culture.

[neccowafer]

I have no idea why people do it.


I would never be friends with anyone who wasn't comfortable with being a gamer, because.. that's what I do. All the time. We'd have almost nothing in common otherwise. I would rather be friends with people who like the same things as me.

I mean, if someone was obsessed with say, sports, and spent all day watching sports, playing sports, following news on sports, etc... Why would they want to be friends with someone who, say, only cares about clubbing, partying, drinking, etc? Those two people would have nothing in common, little to talk about, and chances are they'd have little respect for the other persons' hobby, since you really have to be into something to understand why it's important sometimes.

People will take you seriously if you prove you're someone to be taken seriously. My coworkers just respect me as intelligent and quirky. I'm a gamer, my boyfriend is gamer, and it's our choice of activity any time of the day most likely. However I also get straight A's in university courses, am going into health care, and tutor college level human anatomy and physiology for the local college, so they respect me. I'm the most knowledgeable of our tutors generally and even my two coworkers who are 40+ years old and who can hardly operate a computer let alone play pc games are respectful of me, and in fact come to me to double-check information or ask questions all the time. (I am 21 so I am by far the youngest person who actually works there.)


So what if I sit around in my underwear and play video games all weekend, and every day after school most of the time. Most people in my situation just WISH they could do leisure activities all the times, not study, and still get A's in school, as well as be able to school people who have spent way more time in their field of choice than them. Embrace your geekiness.

And find people who understand. If gaming is that big of a part of your life, find people who understand and share that hobby. You deserve friends that can share in the things that you like. Everyone does. Doesn't mean you need to ditch your old friends totally or anything, but just analyze the situation. If you're hanging with someone that you feel like you need to hide from, why? Do you share any other interests with them? Are they a judgmental person that will make life unpleasant for you? If so you don't need friends like that.

But on the other hand if there are other major things you're into that you can share, roll with that. Not everyone is going to share all the same interests with all of their friends. I mean, I do, but I'm the type of person who only wants a few, very close friends. If you're the type of person that wants a TON of friends, they're not all gonna be gems...

Tell them about your gaming habit. If they make fun of you or freak out or something, they weren't good friends in the first place, so you'd just be weeding out the rubbish ones.

Many people reach maturity with a large number of what I like to call "convenience friends." These are people that they have nothing in common with and may not even like, but they've stuck with them because at one point they were convenient. They went to the same school, were in the same club, worked at the same place, whatever, but they're not the type of people they'd choose as friends. Then they go through life holding onto those people out of a vague sense of obligation because "we've been friends for sooo long" and they allow themselves to be less happy than they'd be with proper friends that really get them. Just my two cents.

Disclaimer: I am a person with very low social needs. I have about 3 good friends and a boyfriend to provide social contact with and I prefer it that way. If you are a much more social person than I am, this may all sound very strange to you.

[Irisel]

I don't, I flaunt it.

[Greasy McNasty]

Jeez, the only people I know that are non-gamers are over the age of 45. Even my mother, who just turned 56, just bought a Wii last year.

Some people are picky about their games though so I usually keep to myself about gaming unless they bring it up.
WoW can be a really touchy subject too. People can jump to the conclusion that you're a total shut in addict just because you play Warcraft and that the game sucks even though they've never even tried it.

[Guldur]

Tell them, stop living life in denial of who you are. I never hid it, I have lots of friends and can get as many of them as I d like. I would always feel awkward if I would not be myself, I even told all my dates I ever had who I really was... and this leant me to be with my beautiful gf who plays WoW as well

[Sorx]

I don't quite hide it, but I never bring it up and address the hobby vaguely if a topic pokes at it. If pressured, as per one's desire to know, I'll gladly speak on the matter. The thing is, gaming is generally stigmatized, and doesn't make for quite a discussion with those who do not share the interest. I don't always feel like clearing up some misunderstand people have on the topic either. In all fairness, sure it's my hobby but I personally see no need for me to flaunt it.

[THoyt]

It's hard to hide it being part of a large LAN team that travels and participates in the regional tri-state tournaments on a monthly basis, I usually don't discuss anything related to video games with RL friends unless they bring up the topic. It's not a big deal, my friends know whats up and I've never been criticized for anything.

[Bearshield]

I've never hid my gaming hobby and never seen a reason to. Why should it matter what you do on your own time? If you're ditching your rl friends for video games then yeah, I can see them getting annoyed but otherwise, it's just a hobby. Everyone has hobbies and if your friends are really your friends, they will respect your interests.

[inboundpaper]

I played console games for a loooong time before I got my pc, so I just played da gaimez.

[Krowz]

I don't hide it, but I don't showcase it. I don't talk about video games at work or on campus unless someone else brings it up or there is a reason for me to, but if someone asks me if I play WoW I say yes.

[namelessone]

Why the hell did OP receive infraction?!

[Mordoran]

I never hid the fact that i like gaming/computers. This proved rather useful in the earlier years of school where I roflstomped my own IT teacher :P

Generally, if they couldn't handle me playing computer games they could gtfo

[Anakso]

I never felt the need to lie about it to my friends, but most of my friends are gamers or play MTG so don't care if I play things like WoW.

I'm not gonna say I've never hidden the fact I game, I definitely have, but never from any male friends. Only time I recall hiding it was from a girl at my work who's weekends are spent in night clubs and such and I didn't much feel like explaining the whole gaming thing to her xP