Single Pity

[Krunk]

A basic question: Any other single guy/girl experience pity for being single from your friends? Im getting the vibe from alot of people I know that they feel sorry for me that Im not in a relationship, and I thought that was a bit odd. Just curious to know if anyone else has had this experience.

[Deleted]

I get harmless jibes from a couple of my friends about it, but its nothing hurtful. I think it's more of an attempt to motivate me to hunt with more vigour to find a nice girl, through "tough love", rather than pointless mockery. I don't feel like its pity, because they've said they know I can find somebody good for me eventually, I think they just get frustrated that I haven't, which is nice.

[Krunk]

I guess its nice to know they care, but my belief has always been that if you look for a partner, you're just going to end up with someone because they are there rather than because they are right. It perplexes me that people find it odd that I am fine being single.

[Morogoth]

I get harmless jibes from a couple of my friends about it, but its nothing hurtful. I think it's more of an attempt to motivate me to hunt with more vigour to find a nice girl, through "tough love", rather than pointless mockery. I don't feel like its pity, because they've said they know I can find somebody good for me eventually, I think they just get frustrated that I haven't, which is nice.

I guess it's the same thing for me.

But i'm really starting to hate all my family reunions. Basically, my grand-mother, grand-father, uncles, aunts, all ask the same question:

"Where is your girlfriend"
"I'm still single"
"why?"
"because I didn't found any girl for me"
"why?"
"because I don't fucking know!! Maybe because I'm happy with my liberty and I don't want my next girlfriend to be a controlling bitch like my ex." grrrrrr

I know they are frustrated because i'm single since almost 5 years and before that I always had a girl each year for christmas. But since a couple of years, I almost get angry when they ask why I don't have a girlfriend yet.

[Youvegotfail]

nope, my friends/family expect me to be single, since it's been the norm now for 28 years.

If I ever do find a woman, I'm sure one or two of them will have heart attacks.

[Reeve]

Not really. Not since college, anyway, and even then it wasn't really serious. Now, if anything, my married friends are slightly jealous of me being able to date around "in my prime." I don't know that I wouldn't rather be married to a person I love, but being single really isn't so bad in your late 20s.

[Jackmoves]

Not single atm, but can't say I have experienced it when I was either.

I'm in the "when are you two going to have children" camp instead... and let me tell you one thing... it's fucking annoying.
I don't have many arguments with my mom since I moved out(which was 8 years ago now) but when she starts with that shit I seriously get irritated.

[Shoridayo]

I get that vibe from some people from time to time.
It's like they can't comprehend that not everyone has a need to be dependent on someone else.

[Deleted]

No. When they bring that up, I laugh at them through the drama they go through, and boast that I do not suffer like them.


I am very fine without. Introversion helps me to literally not care.


The "why don't you have a girlfriend?" question doesn't piss me off as much as "when will you get married?". But what pisses me off the most is how people already assume things and talk about my future children.

[Jager]

I got engaged a few weeks ago, and all of a sudden i went from the envy of the office because of my hot gf (way above my league) to being pittyd for being engaged. I even got a cake saying 'Commiserations'

But ye, when i was single i use to hate hanging out with coupes! Always got the pty vibe coming from them.

[Reeve]

I got engaged a few weeks ago, and all of a sudden i went from the envy of the office because of my hot gf (way above my league) to being pittyd for being engaged. I even got a cake saying 'Commiserations'

But ye, when i was single i use to hate hanging out with coupes! Always got the pty vibe coming from them.

Well hanging out with groups of couples isn't that great while single, but if it's just you and 1 couple or if there are other singles there too, it's plenty fun!

[Deleted]

Well ... i'm not single, but my 2 best friends are ...

one of them wants a girlfriend - really badly - i'm sorry for him that he hadn't had luck in that department yet
the other one couldn't care less. He's happy and likes his situation, so i'm happy for him too.

[Skippy88]

I got asked by my grandfather "When are you going to get married?" last year and I didn't have a girlfriend at the time. People are still entrenched that if your single and over 18 there is something wrong with you. For me I look at it I just haven't found the one and if I never find her so be it. It's not the end of the world.

[Blood Fox]

I get it a lot, the question itself doesn't bother me, however seeing as it implies I need someone else in my life does annoy me. I'm fairly introverted and I really don't like people much less depend on them.

Side note I stopped going to family reunions because they feel the need to talk to me.

[Reeve]

I'm kind of glad that my grandparents never asked me when I was going to get a girlfriend or get married. I guess they are just understanding that these things happen when they happen. Even though I'm the only adult grandchild my grandfather gets along with well and he's probably not going to be around for too many more years, he's never put pressure on me, which is nice.

[ralphie]

Yup. It gets worse when you start hanging out with married couples.

[inheat]

sometimes i envy my married friends but i know well that facebook statuses are just made up. most of them.

i dont get pity from my parents but my BOSSES i have experienced asked me if i was married and wanted to hook me up with other people several times.

[cFortyfive]

It's quite annoying once you slowly reach the age where more and more of your colleagues go for long term relationships and pretend like all of a sudden it's something pitiful to have meaningless weekend hook ups.

[Morogoth]

It's quite annoying once you slowly reach the age where more and more of your colleagues go for long term relationships and pretend like all of a sudden it's something pitiful to have meaningless weekend hook ups.

Yeah, I know what.

Or they find it strange that you can survive without having to plan all your life 3 months in advance...

[Krunk]

Most of my friends are in relationships, and they act like I'm some charity case because Im not in a relationship either. When I explain my point of view, they all tell me its okay, and Im just lying to myself.