My bloody parents

[Deleted]

OK here comes the world's angriest rant. I decided I wanted to join the military age 16 and fought my parents over it. In the end we compromised over finishing my highers and joining the TA. I've left school and applied for the TA. Everything was going well until cutbacks meant the TA would no longer except under 18s. So now I'm unemployed -hooray! The logical thing to do in this economic climate would be to go into the military now as I'm already going in when i'm 18. However my bloody parents still won't budge. I've told them the alternative is living off jobs seekers for a year and lying on the couch and they said they would prefer that to me going into the military! They told me all this bad stuff about what happens to soldiers in basic training (bullying) and guess what I actually listened to them. I researched the stories they were talking about so I had all the facts but decided this was not going to deter me. I then told my parents good things the military does such as helping Afghan women get an education and expected them to research this like I had taken the time to do for them but they refused. They tell me everything good I hear is 'army propoganda'. They cannot see the irony of the situation when they tell me I'm looking at the military with a rose tinted view - I've bothered to research bad things and they won't research good things- they are the ones who are looking at it one sided! How can I make them see this and change their minds?

[RawrPala]

Going by the fact you're female, it can be seen as "Different" - my ex wanted to join the army and her mum just stone wall refused despite the fact her older brother had joined - and why? Because she's a girl, the dad had done a runner and she didn't want to see her only daughter go off into the army. Parents get worried enough when their son wants to join the forces, let alone their daughter.

Instead of sitting there for a year, go do some A levels or a BTEC or something instead and see if you can enter at a higher level - a few of my friends are doing degrees right now with the intention of going into the military, and a bunch of my mates went off 2 years ago leaving our cushy private school in essex to go to a place called Welbeck Defence College just outside Loughborough I think, and they're doing A levels there (we have our exams this week and next) and the intention of that college is that all/most people who go there will join the forces afterwards, at an elevated level to where you would join without.

There will inevitably be something similar in Scotland, but the more qualifications you can get before going in the better it will be when you get there, and if you're good at school and can get them to sponsor you to do a degree you're rocking - a friend of mine is doing Aeronautical Engineering at Leicester university with the intention to go straight into the RAF engineering section straight after. Also, these places (the decent ones for certain, I don't know about the rest) make you do a load of physical anyway so the amount of your own time you have to put into fitness is diminished.

Or, instead of that promotional speech for military colleges, get a job or something? If you're really against doing any further education (I think anyone in further education would recommend you do it though) then you can find work and at least do something. Or you can play Diablo 3 for a year. It's up to you. I just think you'll find it hard to persuade them otherwise so just try and find a suitable alternative to take up that time so it's more bearable, such as further education.

[Ryve]

Wait until you're 18. If you still feel the same way then, you'll be able to make the decisions for yourself.

Also, what kind of work ethic is laying around for a year on welfare? Perhaps this attitude has something to do with your parents feelings on you joining the military.

[Deleted]

why would you have to sit around and claim job seekers for a year? why not work until you're 18? your parents will probably never change their opinions on joining the army, but when you're 18 you are old enough to decide for yourself.

[Deleted]

why would you have to sit around and claim job seekers for a year? why not work until you're 18? your parents will probably never change their opinions on joining the army, but when you're 18 you are old enough to decide for yourself.

Unemployment rate in Scotland for people under 25 not in full time education: 45%. Too many people, to few jobs. It's not impossible, but for someone with only Highers, it will be tough.

[Deleted]

As A serving soldier I would advise you do not join until 18 anyway, boys soldiers as we call them (under 18) are the lowest of the low and completely useless. You will be stuck on base doing crap while the 18+ get to do the fun stuff. Not to mention you will be stuck on base when they all go out "socialising". Wait for 2 years, it will be so much easier on you.

[Jackmoves]

Do you graduate high school as early as age 17 in the UK?

Just do what you feel like once you turn 18, they will respect it and support you as long as there isn't some massive beef going on between you and your parents. Not sure if the british army got similiar things(I would guess so though) but we have "anhörighets träffar"(relative/family meetings) here so parents/gfs/wifes/bfs etc can get properly informed by CEOs/officers about different things as well as seeing what the "job" is all about, they can come to the base, go to the shooting range wit their son/daughter etc ... this gets even more priortized once someone is about to go abroad. Units abroad also got blogs so family/friends can follow day to day life.

Getting the family involved and having them talk to superiors that got a long experience usually calm them down.

[Deleted]

In the end you have to decide wether its worth it to you or not. Can you live with the fact that your parents are angry with you ( even if they are wrong about their conclusions, I really have no idea about the army ) as long as the job makes you happy? If so, go ahead, maybe in time they will see how happy you are with the job and will accept it. But like I said in the end the decision is yours.

[Deleted]

Do you graduate high school as early as age 17 in the UK?

Just do what you feel like once you turn 18, they will respect it and support you as long as there isn't some massive beef going on between you and your parents. Not sure if the british army got similiar things(I would guess so though) but we have "anhörighets träffar"(relative/family meetings) here so parents/gfs/wifes/bfs etc can get properly informed by CEOs/officers about different things as well as seeing what the "job" is all about, they can come to the base, go to the shooting range wit their son/daughter etc ... this gets even more priortized once someone is about to go abroad. Units abroad also got blogs so family/friends can follow day to day life.

Getting the family involved and having them talk to superiors that got a long experience usually calm them down.

We graduate at 16 here, we then have the option of joining the workforce or going into higher education if you have the grades for it.

[Jackmoves]

We graduate at 16 here, we then have the option of joining the workforce or going into higher education if you have the grades for it.

aha I see.

ps. meant NCO not CEO rofl... damn english terms! :P

[RawrPala]

We graduate at 16 here, we then have the option of joining the workforce or going into higher education if you have the grades for it.

Should add to this, the grades to go onto higher education are really not very high either. The GCSE's you get at 16 will have little impact on getting into university at 18 but to get into college you merely have to appear interested mainly.

My school (public school) demands only 6 grade B's at GCSE to get back into 6th form (this is being raised though) as the barrier to getting in was financial rather than intellectual - but the idiots were then kicked out at the end of the AS levels as you needed 3 C's then in the subjects you wanted to continue on to A2 as you would do 4 subjects. Also, you needed certain grades in certain subjects to be allowed to do them - A's in sciences generally albeit a B in biology would suffice, an A in maths or an A* if you wanted to do further maths. However, to get into the local grammar school took I think it was 6 A* at GCSE to get in, with A* in the subjects you wanted to do at A level.

Then, at nearby Chelmsford college, my mate did 5 GCSE's and didn't do that great even in them, but he's doing a BTEC in ICT there right now and is going to university in september with it. Essentially, as long as you have 5 passes at GCSE, which is what the government wants everyone to get, some local college will let you in - however, how good that college is then can be a bit variable as some are lax and some are strict.

[Deleted]

'boys soldiers as we call them (under 18) are the lowest of the low and completely useless'

Why whats wrong with them?

[Jackmoves]

'boys soldiers as we call them (under 18) are the lowest of the low and completely useless'

Why whats wrong with them?

Young and immature? :P

[Deleted]

'boys soldiers as we call them (under 18) are the lowest of the low and completely useless'

Why whats wrong with them?

They cannot deploy until they are 18, so are considered dead weight by the rest of the battalion. When the "adults" deploy, they are left at the base polishing brass. Not to mention they cannot come out drinking with you, so you cannot even socialise with them outside of work.

[Jackmoves]

They cannot deploy until they are 18, so are considered dead weight by the rest of the battalion. When the "adults" deploy, they are left at the base polishing brass. Not to mention they cannot come out drinking with you, so you cannot even socialise with them outside of work.

Well that makes sense, do they get the same pay as adults?

[Deleted]

At 16, well, as far as i'm aware, you have to do what you are told, to some extent. At 18, you can do whatever you want. Personally I think at 16 if you want to go to the Army, you're very unhappy, or you have a very low opinion of yourself. Maybe you want to help people, but your parents will be right in some of the things they say about what goes on, but naturally they might fabricate it to deter you slightly. I'd advise you to give it a second thought

[Deleted]

All I can say is: You have smart parents.

The armed forces are basically a tool for politicians in power to score points - both domestically and internationally.

Those Afghan women? European countries sent their militaries to Afghanistan to score points with the US, and they're looking for any excuse to get out. The US will withdraw as soon as it becomes politically expedient to do so - Obama doesn't want the Taliban to take over a few weeks before elections. In short, those women are screwed - the military isn't doing them any long-term favours.

It's a sign of good parents that they want you to be something more than a nail in the toolbox of a vote-whore (politician).

[Youvegotfail]

IMO (and you're not gonna like it) your parents are right. Wait until you're 18. I would tell you not to join the military at all, but since I'm American and don't know anything about your countries military, I'll refrain. But at least wait until 18 before you make that decision.

[Deleted]

Well that makes sense, do they get the same pay as adults?

Ever so slightly less, but not by much. they get a slight payrise at 18.

[Deleted]

Thanks to everyone who has responded but can I add that this thread was intended to get advice on how to get into the military not to reinforce my parents beliefs