Judging By Physical Appearance

[Deleted]

A little backstory; I've recently been chatting to someone new in WoW, getting to know them a bit, doing random old content for the lols, talking on the phone or on ventrilo etc etc. The topic arose recently that they hadn't seen a recent picture of me, so I sent one over to be met with "Oh, how disappointing that you don't have x, or you don't look like y" which confused me a bit as I'm not sure why it was entirely important.

Anyway the question is - when dealing with people online (whether it be WoW or elsewhere, does your opinion of them change when you find out what they look like. And does physical appearance play any role in determining if you would be friends with someone you met in reality?

[Kasierith]

Not at all. Why should it matter? Physical appearance is only one part of a person's identity. Limiting the people you know in life for something as utterly foolish as basing your entire decision on physical appearance is simple ignorance.

[Deleted]

Looks do not matter to me when it comes to friendship, relationships on the other hand are a different matter.

[Kerath]

Looks do not matter to me when it comes to friendship, relationships on the other hand are a different matter.

What RICH says.
Physical appearance doesn't impact on whether I want to be friends with someone.
I'd be lying if I said looks didn't matter to me in a relationship though. The aren't the most important thing, but they are a factor.

Edit to add: I am surprised that your new 'friend' actually had the temerity to say that your picture was disappointing O.o

[Zippoflames]

It's just how the world works I'm afraid mate,
I know plenty of good looking girls who are absolute horrible bastards and yet I know some ugly girls that are the kindest people you would ever meet.
Which of the above do you think goes on more dates?

[Runeforged]

A little backstory; I've recently been chatting to someone new in WoW, getting to know them a bit, doing random old content for the lols, talking on the phone or on ventrilo etc etc. The topic arose recently that they hadn't seen a recent picture of me, so I sent one over to be met with "Oh, how disappointing that you don't have x, or you don't look like y" which confused me a bit as I'm not sure why it was entirely important.

Anyway the question is - when dealing with people online (whether it be WoW or elsewhere, does your opinion of them change when you find out what they look like. And does physical appearance play any role in determining if you would be friends with someone you met in reality?

I wouldn't say "appearance", but presence plays a role to me at least. For example, in real life, I'm too shy to approach people I don't know. But when I played WoW, I was charismatic enough to become a top ranking officer in 5 different guilds.

[Gandrake]

Looks do not matter to me when it comes to friendship, relationships on the other hand are a different matter.

Well isn't a friendship a type of relationship?

ballbuster!

But really, I don't think they are trying to upset you. You just aren't what they'd imagined to be. It's not really important, but sometimes it's entertaining to think about.

I like to imagine our holy pally as a blonde/brown-haired guy with kind of a douchebag stubble beard, but I wouldn't really care if he was like an overweight guy with thinning black hair.

[CJack14dt]

You are known by the friends you keep so I tend to shy away from people that are generally grungy, habitually emotionally reactive and people that are very obviously druggies.

[LocNess]

Looks do not matter to me when it comes to friendship, relationships on the other hand are a different matter.

This. Friends with all sorts of people, but when it comes to dating I can be physically shallow.

[Antixmother]

It does and it doesn't. I tend to try to put a face to the person then realize I was completely off (big shocker there right? lol). its just getting used to putting their real face to the person rather than what I expected. I'm not going to be any different to the person at all regardless of what they look like. Like LocNess said, I'm not dating them so looks are irrelevant to me.

[Deleted]

What RICH says.
Physical appearance doesn't impact on whether I want to be friends with someone.
I'd be lying if I said looks didn't matter to me in a relationship though. The aren't the most important thing, but they are a factor.

Edit to add: I am surprised that your new 'friend' actually had the temerity to say that your picture was disappointing O.o

It caught me off guard a bit, I can be a fairly self-conscious person so it wasn't the greatest moment!

[ryotte]

I can honestly say that my WoW friends...I don't give a damn what they look like irl. They're my friends because of their personality. I've seen many by now and it doesn't change anything to me. Sometimes it is surprising; the looks don't seem to match the voice and personality.

IRL I've tried since I was a kid not to let looks influence my friendships, because I had this idea that you didn't really see what someone looked like until you got familiar with them and got to know them, based on what kind of person they were overall and in different lights and situations, etc, moreso than what you notice at first glance. And I still think it holds true...someone who may not be physically attractive will not be "ugly" to you if you get to know them and they're an awesome person. And the most beautiful/handsome person could turn out to be a jerk and start to look ugly to your eyes; you start to hate that face she makes, notice the flaws, see through the mask, etc.

[Jackmoves]

Online? I don't give a damn.

Life partner, looks matter no doubt. Friendships, not so much as long as they ain't extremly obese, I got issues with people who are fat as fuck and still eats like a horse/does nothing to change their situation. Same goes for other things that got a negative effect on health and appearance, heavy drug use etc... I know they ain't bad people and I'll give everyone a chance or two but they better shape up.

[FathomFear]

What RICH says.
Physical appearance doesn't impact on whether I want to be friends with someone.
I'd be lying if I said looks didn't matter to me in a relationship though. The aren't the most important thing, but they are a factor.

Edit to add: I am surprised that your new 'friend' actually had the temerity to say that your picture was disappointing O.o

Many people say this "in theory", but don't you find that attractive people tend to have attractive friends? And vice versa? How often have you seen a guy who looks like an Adonis, has a six pack, etc, who's best friends with an overweight nerd? It's rare.

[Slummish]

I would like to say I'm as enlightened and fair as everyone else here claims to be. However, there are limits I'm willing to accept even in friendship when it comes to someone's physical appearance. I can deal with earlobes stretched to ridiculous sizes. I can handle any skin color. I can handle disabilities.

I cannot bring myself to deal with morbid obesity. I can't have friends with screwed up teeth or excessive acne.

Maybe it's just me, but I find those I surround myself with reflect who I am and if you're grotesque and don't work to fix it, then I can't be your friend.

[Kerath]

Many people say this "in theory", but don't you find that attractive people tend to have attractive friends? And vice versa? How often have you seen a guy who looks like an Adonis, has a six pack, etc, who's best friends with an overweight nerd? It's rare.

Well, yeah, maybe... But I can't speak for them, only for myself.

[Korrina]

I just admit I am petty and shallow. I have tolerance for small things, and some things that people don't have control over. But people love to draw that line in favor of being lazy, and I don't tolerate that at all. So, sure looks matter to me for friendship and especially for relationships. But online, if they're hideous, I don't really mind as long as it's not a constant topic of discussion, and I don't have to look at them, as terrible as that sounds. What is funny though about this, is I have definite 'no no's' when it comes to IRL, but outside of those, I am pretty liberal as to who I will accept within those confines. And as harsh as I may sound, I'm not going to not be friends with someone because they're a little over weight, or have a minor acne problem, or other such things. As a potential partner though, I have some tough standards. I even used to be liberal with that, and I found out the hard way that I was just fooling myself into thinking I could be attracted to them for a long period of time.

[Antherios]

A girl that i liked once, saw a picture of my big brother .. she said to me "little antherios (my real name ofc), why cant you look like your brother"

It hurts man .. im still scarred for that one, and a lot more.

[Myrrar]

Many people say this "in theory", but don't you find that attractive people tend to have attractive friends? And vice versa? How often have you seen a guy who looks like an Adonis, has a six pack, etc, who's best friends with an overweight nerd? It's rare.

That has more to do with the person than their looks. People who really care about how they look and take care of themselves most of the time want to be around others like that. But, I know plenty of people who are into sports and extremely fit and have overweight nerd friends. People base friendships off different things, there is no black and white. If in college my best friend from high school had gotten really fat I wouldn't have all of a sudden stopped being friends with her.

When it comes to friendship, idc what you look like. If you have bad hygiene and bad manners I don't want to be around you. If you are overweight due to pure gluttony and laziness I don't want to be around you. But these aren't due to looks.

Relationships, you date people who you are physically attracted to. Again, no black and white, going to be different for every person.

[Thelxi]

I used to feel really guilty caring about physical appearance, but now I've reached the conclusion that your body is just as much part of you as your brain, and good looks are just as lucky as a good brain.