Tips on how to not be a creeper

[Deleted]

let's get this straight - if you are male and you don't look atleast like Ryan Gosling, you will be creepy.

[c1nn4m0n]

Solution is to get over it. It's sexist to say men need to change our behavior to suit your needs. In fact I'd say the idea that men are an ever present threat to you is one of the most self-centered world views I've ever heard.

You don't have to change your behaviour. Some however, might find it useful to see how it can be perceived.

..........

[Lora]

There seems to be a feminism nazi undertone to this, at least thats what I am getting out of it.

[Grishnaz]

Solution is to get over it. It's sexist to say men need to change our behavior to suit your needs. In fact I'd say the idea that men are an ever present threat to you is one of the most self-centered world views I've ever heard.

So you think its reasonable for women to accept having their hair smelt/being groped/yelling at them at night time?

Admittedly staring and a homeless guy asking for change might be a bit harsh.

[vizzle]

Yes guys, it's never your own fault why you're being called creepers. Never.

---------- Post added 2012-07-31 at 09:21 PM ----------

..........

Ignore them, you came to a forum of gamers. I'm not one who usually says "lol post on MMO-C?" but in this thread it seems to be about right.

[Fenixdown]

It's more convenient to blame someone other than yourself.

Some girls may use it as an excuse - but I bet it's not nearly as many as some people think.

Yes it is. Don't try to play off the 21st century woman as some sort of over-sophisticated and complex being. If it's hot, rich, or has a wang the size of a 2 x 4, it's not creepy.

I just call it like I see it. And I see it like that A. LOT.

[korsic]

So you think its reasonable for women to accept having their hair smelt/being groped/yelling at them at night time?

Nobody here has said that those things are acceptable, they are also unacceptable no matter what sex you are. The only point people here are trying to make is that while some men truly are creepy, it is a term that is overused, generally to describe someone who you find unattractive that is making an advance towards you.

[Sam the Wiser]

As soon as I opened that article I knew what was coming. Since I am that creep they are talking about I think ill just remain to be myself.

[Laize]

So you think its reasonable for women to accept having their hair smelt/being groped/yelling at them at night time?

Admittedly staring and a homeless guy asking for change might be a bit harsh.

I was only referring to the part about guys unintentionally being creepy. The smelling hair thing is creepy, but that's different than "facing with your body and feet" or "making eye contact". Although come on... EVERYONES ass gets touched on the train.

This idea that women have that men creeping them out is a male problem is bullshit that fuels a furnace of hate in me. Everything in social interactions is the man's responsibility. Where are the step by step guides for women to not come off as bitches when they're not interested in a guy? Where are the guides teaching women how men deal differently with life situations? Everything from lack of male communication to being creepy apparently is men's fault. I'm fucking sick of it.

[Deleted]

Yes guys, it's never you're own fault why you're being called creepers. Never.

If I'm air humping in your direction, it's your fault for being too attractive.

But in all seriousness, OP, just tell them to back off. Hoping that they will pick up the little signals won't work.
Men need to be told straight up if they're crossing the line.

[c1nn4m0n]

I knew there would be backlash, of course.

I just hope it helps someone stop and think - wait, is that how I come across?

Then they can make a more informed decision about what they want to do.

[Ashnazg]

Ahaha, point 3 reminds me of this one time that I went to my friends party, and I decided to see how many women would be off-put by funny (black-humor) rape stories.

So I shared 3 or 4 from my practice (I used to work in criminal law, and you naturally develop an immunity to sad shit if you work in any field that has to do with crime) - all fairly amusing stories, too. At the end of the night, the table polarized quite a bit in their attitude to me, the girls working in public-oriented fields (1 was a teacher, and 1 was in marketing) were repulsed by the fact that I found humor in those stories, whereas the girls working in more detached fields were indifferent, or amused (another lawyer girl was indifferent, and the last girl at the table with a PhD in software engineering was amused). I am sure there is a conclusion in there somewhere to be drawn about females in traditionally male fields of employment.

edit:

This idea that women have that men creeping them out is a male problem is bullshit that fuels a furnace of hate in me

Its a male problem inasmuch as if you're a male who wants to get laid on a regular basis, but women run away from you continuously, you can read this article and find out why.

Otherwise, you can creep out all the women you want. After all, if you're not trying to get into their pants, what do you care what they see you as?

[haxartus]

I'm writing it from a male point of view, so if a female wants to correct me, go ahead.
Non-creepy:
You express interest in a girl -> she expresses interest in you = cool.
You express interest in a girl -> she doesn't express interest in you=ok, have fun, bb.[/B]
Creepy:
You express interest in a girl -> she expresses interest in you = omfg, awesome, you're going to tell all of your friends and your mom.
You express interest in a girl -> she doesn't express interest in you= you get angry, refuse to accept it and continue to attempt to "get close to her".
Some girls can sense if you are going to do one of the above things even before you do it.

[Shuya82]

Yes guys, it's never you're own fault why you're being called creepers. Never.

---------- Post added 2012-07-31 at 09:21 PM ----------



Ignore them, you came to a forum of gamers. I'm not one who usually says "lol post on MMO-C?" but in this thread it seems to be about right.

Way to insult an entire community, a community that judging by your post count, you are very much a part of.

The first person (the one who fired up this debate) who posted simply stated that while some people do do creepy things, that the word creepy ALSO gets thrown around towards people who don't deserve it, and that is absolutely true on both counts.

[Laize]

Yes guys, it's never you're own fault why you're being called creepers. Never.

I never said that. Those guys that back a girl into a corner need a swift knee to the coin purse.

But calling a guy creepy because he's facing you (which is how we're generally conditioned to show someone they have our full attention) is one of the most maddening things I've read about male/female interaction in a while.

[FathomFear]

Yes guys, it's never you're own fault why you're being called creepers. Never.[COLOR="red"]

I think you're misinterpreting what's happening in this thread. Creepy behavior definitely exists. I've seen it first hand. The problem, however, is that the "creepy" label tends to get overused to an extreme. Smelling someone's hair, for example, is definitely creepy.

[Ghostie]

That article is a bunch of crap and the advice to not look someone directly in the eyes or talk to someone over your shoulder - that's suspicious behavior to me. If someone gets too close to me and continues to close the gap when I back off or tries to touch my person when I obviously am uncomfortable with the touching or stalks me, that's what a creeper does. I don't judge people by thier appearance, hygeine yeah, you'll get judged if you smell, but good looking or average, if you stalk, you're a creeper. Honestly, men who think they're good looking are more likely to be creepers because they can't take rejection than a person who considers themself to be average looking.

[Deleted]

[vizzle]

Way to insult an entire community, a community that judging by your post count, you are very much a part of.

The first person (the one who fired up this debate) who posted simply stated that while some people do do creepy things, that the word creepy ALSO gets thrown around towards people who don't deserve it, and that is absolutely true on both counts.

I just think that people should be open to the idea that there may be something wrong with them, but it seems as if many people didn't even give the article a chance before saying "I'm not creepy, girls just call me creepy because they're bitches." C'mon guys, seriously.

Yeah, the term does get overused, but if you're going so far as to say "I'm not going to change who I am for a girl", I don't know what extent you mean by that. If you mean you're going to act around a girl you're trying to impress the same way you're going to act with your buds, then yes, you'll probably come off creepy.

[DeltrusDisc]

Ignore them, you came to a forum of gamers. I'm not one who usually says "lol post on MMO-C?" but in this thread it seems to be about right.

About the two posts she was quoting... definitely. >_<