Could you?

[Reeve]

If I'm not ugly whats wrong with me?

Could be that because you think of yourself as ugly you lack confidence, which isn't attractive to most girls. Or you could just lack some social skills in general. Or maybe you just don't try.

[Gamdwelf]

Could be that because you think of yourself as ugly you lack confidence, which isn't attractive to most girls. Or you could just lack some social skills in general. Or maybe you just don't try.

I'm going to stick with ugly.

[Kisho]

Be happy. That's all there is to life. If you're happy with a relationship, go for it. If you're happy being single, that's fine too.

There are plenty of different ways to be happy. You just have to figure out what works best for you.

[Kalis]

What you look like is only a small % of what women care about in a man.

If women don't really care about looks, and only go on personality, how do you explain why I am not a virgin and have constantly been in relationships for the last 25 years?

[Gamdwelf]

If women don't really care about looks, and only go on personality, how do you explain why I am not a virgin and have constantly been in relationships for the last 25 years?

^^^ not ugly
<---- ugly

[Kalis]

I'm going to stick with ugly.

Male or female?

[Gamdwelf]

Male or female?

Ugly male.

[Thetrollific]

I think that it is possible to do what you are saying, live a life of solitude, but it is awesome when you find someone, and when you do its not like you miss your life of solitude, because its like having a really awesome best friend with benefits, but its more than that, in my experience when you really do have the real thing, its not like anything else, and its by no means a stress, at least not to the point where its not worth the stress it causes, but if you never find the right person, then I would say its not worth every having a family or putting up with any of it, because it is simply not worth it... if the person is right, then it is easy to take on that stress.

[Monolith of Mazes]

You're 21 so you're bound to change overall as a person quite a bit still. But there's nothing wrong with living alone all your life.
I'd definitely consider it if there was any chance I could get a child alone.

Oh, the myriad ways in which this could be interpreted...

[FathomFear]

I have no desire to get married. If I met a guy and it was really important for him to marry, I might consider it though. Personally I find the institution to be outdated.

[Torq]

If women don't really care about looks, and only go on personality, how do you explain why I am not a virgin and have constantly been in relationships for the last 25 years?

[E] Wait, nevermind, misread this.

What exactly are you asking? Are you saying you have a terrible personality?

[Gamdwelf]

I have no desire to get married. If I met a guy and it was really important for him to marry, I might consider it though. Personally I find the institution to be outdated.

You feel promises to be outdated?

[vindicatorx]

I'm 34 and happy with no significant other have been for years. I am very organized when it comes to my routine and I do not like changes or alterations not that I do the same thing daily but, it is very similar. I also am not very tolerant of significant others quirkiness meaning I generally get annoyed and end up end the relationship. I also guess I am selfish and don't think of others a whole lot and this tends to scare some of them off. I don't ask how there day was cause I generally don't care. I also had a few friends who married girls because they felt they had to marry someone and start a family and that there was no one else whom they would meet who would be interested in them and I refuse to do similar.

[Kalis]

Ugly male.

Wink (it's important that you read that correctly, otherwise you could get into a lot of trouble).

[Bigbamboozal]

Okay so I'm a 35 year old man. Here's some of my take on it.
Not everyone is wired the same, everyone has a different take on their life blueprint and what makes them happy.
You COULD avoid it. You could still date, play the field. It CAN work. Seen it.

I went to a funeral of an old guy who never married and had 5 or so different GF's. They all knew each other, and spoke well of him. (I don't think they all lived there like a playboy mansion or anything, but I am sure he spoiled them pretty well when they were there.)
But yes, he had a successful company, large home, lots of friends, and all the kids called him Grandpa, though it was friends children.
I have no doubts his life was anything but lonely.

But, if you ARE going to make a good go of it, (and honestly, there are some good reasons to try), maybe a talk with a shrink might be in order.
Just as a precaution, and to work through your current inability to feel connected with anyone.
I'm not slagging on you, I think there's nothing wrong (except the bill) with going to chat about things.

As we get older we need to adjust our perceptions a bit and rethink plenty, our tastes change.
Sometimes it's a hard shift. Anyways, you might feel love-dead today, but shit can happen in a blink.
It's chemical, and primal, willingness to feel the feelings not included or required...if you do, you will
It's obvious stuff and oft said I'd suppose, but it holds true I think.
Best to just keep an open mind and try to enjoy life no matter what direction you meander in I suppose

[Deleted]

Ugly male.

I tried to see if I am ugly, but the mirror broke before I saw my reflection.

[Osyrus]

i guess im a bit different.

i want to find my partner in crime. someone i can be completely myself with, tell them everything , that sort of relationship is what i want.

i am alone now, but I dont want to be alone forever. but im just going to chug along and hope ill be 'luck enough' to find that person...and if not im going to have numerous pets lol

[Kalyyn]

Oh, the myriad ways in which this could be interpreted...

AHAHAHAHAHAHA! Oh thank you, sir. I laughed so damn hard.

[bekilrwale]

Why do people need to get married, you shouldn't have to sign a contract with someone you "love" saying you will never cheat or leave them. If it comes to the point where you want to move on you shouldn't be shackled by a piece of paper that says you will lose half your shit if you leave your old "love".

[Seirith]

Could you do the same? Do you want to? Why / Why not?

Could I do the same? Technically, I could but see below.
Do I want to? No

Why not? Well, for one thing I'm married and I love my husband very much. We met online when I was 14 and he was 18. A few weeks after meeting online we met in real life and starting dating. 2 months after I finished HS he asked me to marry him ( I had just turned 18 when he asked) and a few years later we got married. Now we have been together 14 years total and married 6. After 14 years he is still my best friend and I love him to death. We don't want children so it will just be us and our pets.

I personally enjoy having someone to share my life with. I would rather be poor and happily married than be rich and alone. Also, for me being married does not mean I have to stop doing things I enjoy. Twice a year I go on vacation with my parents with him, I go out with my mother one day a week with out him and I have hobbies I do that he does not enjoy.


If you don't want to get married and are happy with your life the way then don't get married.