I must complain about my female friend.

[The Riddler]

I think it could be boiled down to a simple phrase. It is a generalization of course, and not always applicable, but as a generic truism I think the essence is correct as with most stereotypes...

Lots of men are "Love-Them-And-Leave-Them" Horn-dogs and lots of women are "Stay-With-And-Fix-Them" Gold-diggers.

Most women will never admit to their primary attractions being money and power/fame. Ask them and they will almost always say that they just want a guy who is "nice", who is "funny", or who "respects them". That's just the lipstick they put on the pig though. No woman wants to admit they're a gold-digger at heart, so when asked they toss out the "Nice Guy" lie. Maybe they even believe it too. It's those OTHER women who are the gold-diggers... Not ME...!

But those women are typically SURROUNDED by "nice guys" who the woman wouldn't spit on even if the guy's hair was on fire. What they really mean is they want a "Rich Guy" who is also a "Nice Guy". However, given the opportunity they will take a "Rich Guy / Jerk" first with the hope of turning him into a "Rich Guy / Nice Guy" over the years. Meanwhile the "Normal / Nice Guy" stays in the FriendZone while she looks for someone with a bigger bank account or who rolls in the right circles.

[Jazara]

You have seen bad people? As in "He have the looks of someone that is a bad guy, he will break your heart"?

And good people with good people like you say. What if the guy who looks like a bad person, really is a good person but you just decided to jugde him by the way he looked?

If you know someone that say "Have beaten their girlfriends", or "He fucked 5 women while in a previous relationship" etc then one could say "There is a chance he will do the same to you". But not, "This guy has tattoos, he looks like a cheater, and he drives a bike, he is bad and will hurt you!"^^

---------- Post added 2013-03-11 at 07:49 PM ----------



People can change. Sadly most people will look at you like the person you used to be, and not who you are now. But good for you o/

Yea, the consequences of becoming what I was still follow me today. It's a crappy thing to live with, but, it helped make me the person I am today. When you become everything you hoped you'd never be, you learn about how to be the way you want to be, by simply NOT being like you were. If that makes sense.

---------- Post added 2013-03-11 at 01:59 PM ----------

Actually, I've found that to be true more often than not in my own experiences. Women who say they want bad boys end up calling those guys jerks, and women who say they want stable partners end up sleeping with "bad boys" for thrills. Classic "biology interfering with psychological needs" syndrome, which affects men as well. Dudes want the hot chick but end up hating her when she can't hold a conversation, but then try dating the smart unattractive girls and can't stay physically interested or get intimidated.

I've found this to be very true.

[Sorrior]

Yea, the consequences of becoming what I was still follow me today. It's a crappy thing to live with, but, it helped make me the person I am today. When you become everything you hoped you'd never be, you learn about how to be the way you want to be, by simply NOT being like you were. If that makes sense.

---------- Post added 2013-03-11 at 01:59 PM ----------



I've found this to be very true.

First here here. As someoene who has seen and done thier fair share of stupid things(not sexual but still dumb) and been though some stuff i can agree...Once you become what you hate/fear you will endeavor to become what you wnat/need to be.

..And second i wonder if it's estrogen/testosterone..My testosterone is rather low and i have that whole fix em mentality(may have higher then usual estrogen as well need to check it out....)

[Forsedar]

I have learned that it seems girls are naturally attracted to the 'bad boys' earlier on in life. And by earlier, I mean up and midway through college. After that, it seems to change into wanting someone that can take care of her and provide for her- which is natural.

I was always friend-zoned by beautiful girls growing up, watching them make dumb mistakes and date guys who were clearly morons. I would hear them complain as well as the inevitable "theres no good guys out there!" Its silly, but if girls just checked who they friend-zoned, I'm sure they'd find a nice and reliable guy willing to give her the world. Of course that would require logic but whats logic when the guy has a MOTORCYCLE!??!?

[Deleted]

I have learned that it seems girls are naturally attracted to the 'bad boys' earlier on in life. And by earlier, I mean up and midway through college. After that, it seems to change into wanting someone that can take care of her and provide for her- which is natural.

Depends on the country/cuture. In my country it seems it never stops. Then mid 25-30 they get married and cheat as much as possible, this goes for men and women. At 35 they divorce and split, court for child custody. That if they are semi decent people, if not, the vast majority of cases the guy is abusive so she doesn't leave.

But hey, let's just sit here in the friend-zone and observe. Went about your route also, suggested to a few of set female friends to maybe become more then friends but they can't have that, could they?

Bottom line still is that it's a two men show. If she doesn't want to, or can't see it, you are way better off just being a friend and/or maybe down the line not even that, cut all ties. When it comes down to it if you are the nice guy, she is the ones that loses not you.

[Jazara]

I have learned that it seems girls are naturally attracted to the 'bad boys' earlier on in life. And by earlier, I mean up and midway through college. After that, it seems to change into wanting someone that can take care of her and provide for her- which is natural.

I was always friend-zoned by beautiful girls growing up, watching them make dumb mistakes and date guys who were clearly morons. I would hear them complain as well as the inevitable "theres no good guys out there!" Its silly, but if girls just checked who they friend-zoned, I'm sure they'd find a nice and reliable guy willing to give her the world. Of course that would require logic but whats logic when the guy has a MOTORCYCLE!??!?

I have to agree with this, too. I've found the the older I get, the more I roll my eyes at men that I would have drooled over five years ago. Now, to me, there's nothing sexier than a man being playful and affectionate with children haha

[Sorrior]

I have learned that it seems girls are naturally attracted to the 'bad boys' earlier on in life. And by earlier, I mean up and midway through college. After that, it seems to change into wanting someone that can take care of her and provide for her- which is natural.

I was always friend-zoned by beautiful girls growing up, watching them make dumb mistakes and date guys who were clearly morons. I would hear them complain as well as the inevitable "theres no good guys out there!" Its silly, but if girls just checked who they friend-zoned, I'm sure they'd find a nice and reliable guy willing to give her the world. Of course that would require logic but whats logic when the guy has a MOTORCYCLE!??!?

Hell if i could i WOULD give the woman i like the world...hell i'd punch a god in the face steal his powers and make her her own universe if i could..... But yeah..I actually CAN;T judge the other guy and by all righst he IS probably better then me for her..I just wish he would give her the attention she deserves...Once or twice a week(as in even BEING around her) isn't enough and he hardly chats/texts...but he has the whole army i work alot thing going for him...

But yeah women will choose guys with money/power/what have you over someone who would ed anything they could for them.

[Aspect of Death]

Of course that would require logic but whats logic when the guy has a MOTORCYCLE!??!?

See, this right there.
You see a guy dating your female-friend, you don't know this guy. You see he have a motorcycle, and some tattoos.

Then, call your friend "WHY are you dating that guy! he will break your heart, why are you doing the same mistakes" blabla.

You just assumed he was a bad guy, just like stupid people assumed i was a bad guy in a previous relatioship i had with a girl, while i wasn't.

[Sorrior]

I have to agree with this, too. I've found the the older I get, the more I roll my eyes at men that I would have drooled over five years ago. Now, to me, there's nothing sexier than a man being playful and affectionate with children haha

How about one who would gladly take you shopping? Who feels good when you do or feels your pain? Or one who when your'e down would rather take it all upon himself if he could?

See i'm like that and MORE but...Yeah women don't want an emotional guy it seems.

also can i just say you have a very lucky husband.

[Aspect of Death]

Yea, the consequences of becoming what I was still follow me today. It's a crappy thing to live with, but, it helped make me the person I am today. When you become everything you hoped you'd never be, you learn about how to be the way you want to be, by simply NOT being like you were. If that makes sense.

I understand, i have been throu some big changes in my personality aswell.

[Deleted]

How about one who would gladly take you shopping? Who feels good when you do or feels your pain? Or one who when your'e down would rather take it all upon himself if he could?

See i'm like that and MORE but...Yeah women don't want an emotional guy it seems.

also can i just say you have a very lucky husband.

Different women want different things. But before 30 very very few ones want a guy like you describe. Even less want a intelligent (overthinker type) introvert.

And why would they? About half of them want to focus on their career and seek out men just for casual sex or are still mooching on with their high-school boyfriend (you know the one that promised her that they will marry next year, each year) and the other half are out partying and not giving a fuck about anything.

How I see it, if you are are unattractive and under 30, search hard a for a possible match while working your ass off to get your career and money going, after 30 either mingle and still search in the 30+ women pool where you will find vast majority of divorced women or use your power/money to impress younger ones and be happy denial, since she is in it not for you (out of love).

[Sorrior]

I understand, i have been throu some big changes in my personality aswell.

I think alot of people who actually mature have been....Those who mature just seem to be becoming more and more rare however.

[Seezer]

Agreed. Maybe some women love having drama in their love lives, but the rest of us certainly don't. High school can keep the drama.





Where the hell are you guys meeting these women at?

Everyone says they don't like drama. Nobody will ever admit to it. But those are often the same ppl that love it. Human beings are dramatic in nature. And yes. Even men. Just in different ways.

[Sorrior]

Different women want different things. But before 30 very very few ones want a guy like you describe. Even less want a intelligent (overthinker type) introvert.

And why would they? About half of them want to focus on their career and seek out men just for casual sex or are still mooching on with their high-school boyfriend (you know the one that promised her that they will marry next year, each year) and the other half are out partying and not giving a fuck about anything.

LOL yeah i know....Just depressing as fucking hell in some ways man....Really is..Also i'm ironically not just an introvert but am quite social when i need/want to be. I AM an overthinker however...I also am a fighter LOL...I'm an odd one TBH...I can be incredibly kind and passive but if someone starts to abuse or hurt someone around me due to my past it REALLY brings out a burning rage in me.

But yeah i know EXACTLY what you mean and it just sucks.

---------- Post added 2013-03-11 at 07:26 PM ----------

Everyone says they don't like drama. Nobody will ever admit to it. But those are often the same ppl that love it. Human beings are dramatic in nature. And yes. Even men. Just in different ways.

I'll admit to it LOL. But it depends on the time/place and my mood LOL.

[Seezer]

I have learned that it seems girls are naturally attracted to the 'bad boys' earlier on in life. And by earlier, I mean up and midway through college. After that, it seems to change into wanting someone that can take care of her and provide for her- which is natural.

I was always friend-zoned by beautiful girls growing up, watching them make dumb mistakes and date guys who were clearly morons. I would hear them complain as well as the inevitable "theres no good guys out there!" Its silly, but if girls just checked who they friend-zoned, I'm sure they'd find a nice and reliable guy willing to give her the world. Of course that would require logic but whats logic when the guy has a MOTORCYCLE!??!?

Could you have used a more cliche portrait of a "bad boy"? A motorcycle? XD

[Deleted]

But yeah i know EXACTLY what you mean and it just sucks.

And you know what the worst thing is? If you try to lower your "standard" you will be midly happy a bit but not that much and you will end up being that "jerk" that broke up with her because yeah she was smart but she wasn't that attractive, or she was attractive but she wasn't that smart.

So the best thing is to just have "friends" and maybe "friends with benefits", type of relationships where you know what you get, what she gets. But I guess that's how my uber rational thinking sees it.

[Deleted]

As for the drama and women connection i found this very funny, especially the part about hysterical paroxysm.

http://voices.yahoo.com/the-treatmen...g-5503961.html

[Deleted]

Could you have used a more cliche portrait of a "bad boy"? A motorcycle? XD

The guy that never had a job, he just flips stuff and then drink all day, like you see on all those dozen of shows on Discovery. The "slick" guys are usually the real "bad boys".

[Seezer]

And you know what the worst thing is? If you try to lower your "standard" you will be midly happy a bit but not that much and you will end up being that "jerk" that broke up with her because yeah she was smart but she wasn't that attractive, or she was attractive but she wasn't that smart.

So the best thing is to just have "friends" and maybe "friends with benefits", type of relationships where you know what you get, what she gets. But I guess that's how my uber rational thinking sees it.

This is what happens alot of times with girls too. They find a guy who is nice, financially stable or well off, who treats them well, but they aren't sexually attracted to. So what happens inevitably? They want hot sex. And they will find it. Anyone who has ever watched Investigative Discovery can see what I'm talking about.

[Ebildays]

I think it could be boiled down to a simple phrase. It is a generalization of course, and not always applicable, but as a generic truism I think the essence is correct as with most stereotypes...

Lots of men are "Love-Them-And-Leave-Them" Horn-dogs and lots of women are "Stay-With-And-Fix-Them" Gold-diggers.

Most women will never admit to their primary attractions being money and power/fame. Ask them and they will almost always say that they just want a guy who is "nice", who is "funny", or who "respects them". That's just the lipstick they put on the pig though. No woman wants to admit they're a gold-digger at heart, so when asked they toss out the "Nice Guy" lie. Maybe they even believe it too. It's those OTHER women who are the gold-diggers... Not ME...!

But those women are typically SURROUNDED by "nice guys" who the woman wouldn't spit on even if the guy's hair was on fire. What they really mean is they want a "Rich Guy" who is also a "Nice Guy". However, given the opportunity they will take a "Rich Guy / Jerk" first with the hope of turning him into a "Rich Guy / Nice Guy" over the years. Meanwhile the "Normal / Nice Guy" stays in the FriendZone while she looks for someone with a bigger bank account or who rolls in the right circles.

You do know that the majority of men do not fall into the "rich guy" group and still get married. the female may not find the friendzoned guy sexually attractive, how many guys have female friends that are great people but friendzoned because they don't find them sexually attractive. I find that generally most guys when talking about how all women are "Gold-diggers" are only talking about one type of woman, the ones they think are smoking hot. Most of the time, at younger ages, those types of women do want to date "up" because they know they can.