Girlfriend gone.

[Ninotchka]

You hurt because you're supposed to hurt. It sounds like you left at the right time. You're both young, and she sounds (understandably) still a bit insecure.

If you end up in a similar work situation in the future (and if you're in film you're likely to) and you still want to keep some future relationship going, you're going to need someone who's secure in herself. Also it helps to do extra upfront work and ongoing relationship maintenance to make sure she is secure enough to give you space when you need to devote all your energy to work.

Don't hurry to be in another relationship. It's not fair to the next person you get involved with to constantly be compared to your first even if the comparisons are favorable.

And don't close the door on her completely. Take the time to truly process your feelings, give her time to grow up a bit while you're growing up. When you've found a better balance in the future, when she's gotten a bit grounded, it could work again.

Honestly, if you've been dating for a year and a half and she's around your age, she and you have never been really single. It's a terrifying place to be, but it's also liberating. Some psychologists say there are three types of relationships - dependant, independant, and interdependant. The best relationships are interdependant, where you fill in each other's weak spots and buttress one another's strengths. But you'll have difficulty forming that sort of relationship until you have created your own independant self, and really know the places where you are strong and the places where you are weak.

[Deleted]

People change, circumstances change. I think it's pretty normal to think your first big relationship is like the relationship to end all relationships. But it's not. It only feels like that because everybody throws absolutely everything into it.

You'll move on, meet new people, fall in love again. You can turn even the most negative situation into a positive one if you learn something from it.

Chin up!

[Deleted]

Shit happens.

Plenty more worms in the mud.

Sounds like you had a lucky escape anyway. She sounds like a waste of time.

[Stockers]

Situation is also exacerbated by teenage hormones. They make everything better. Or worse. or more "meh."

Ahem. Getting a shot at a great job/career when you're that young is amazing. Not that you seemed to question it, but let me affirm that you were certainly correct in pursuing it with as much sweat and blood as required. Work like that can have exponential payoffs in later years.

As for your lady friend, it sounds like she was somewhat disinterested in the first place. Perhaps you knew that on some level. Perhaps your "sudden" departure of emotion wasn't so sudden, merely your realization of the matter.

The only real advice I can offer on getting over the breakup is to keep busy. Idle hands are the devil's playground. Idle minds are regret's grazing field. Don't try to not dwell on it. Accept the feelings as they pop up, process them, and then get back to work.

---------- Post added 2013-03-29 at 02:39 PM ----------



Because young people are completely incapable of feeling pain or loss or regret.

No but I remember when I was his age, some 12, nearly 13 years ago now. Smallest of things get blown out of proportion. There is a lot of growing up to be done, and when that is done, you look back and laugh, sure as hell I do. But I guess I am one of the lucky ones. I have loved and lost in my youth, but currently been with my girlfriend coming up to 9 years and we have a beautiful baby girl.

[Deleted]

If it was your first love, youll never forget her. Never. Not even if you try. There will always be a hole, and the nostalgic you will remember both the happy times and the sad times. As long as you keep yourself occupied and find a new partner you should be ok, give it a couple of months and the scar will heal piece by piece

[thedeacon]

A year and a half is a very long time at your age. Be proud of that. It will hurt for a very long time - some people say a good rule of thumb is half as long as the relationship lasted. You will almost certainly want to get back together at some point. Don't. You're young and it's healthy to move on.

Be proud of yourself. Your career made a big breakthrough, you had some very good times with a very nice girl, and you had the self-respect to end it when it wasn't what it should be. You managed to play wow and not get addicted. I started wow after a bad breakup and still can't escape it

Find a good outlet for the frustration and pain. Work out, be outside as much as possible. Flirt with anyone you want. Expect the pain, it's normal. It means you didn't waste the last year and a half on a worthless girl. Good things are in your future.

[Sabira]

Is that her on your avatar? and how are you feeling now when a little but still some time has passed?