personality vs weight

[Preston Garvey]

I have a female friend that is having problems with her body mass. She feels that men don't like her because of her weight. She doesn't understand why men can't just like her for who she is. The only reason why looks matter to most is because of sex. Other than sex looks will be pretty much almost useless. She then told me it should be about the personality and not the looks. I told her then that personality doesn't have anything to do with sex. I think men and women who have this type of argument are just lazy.


These are the facts:

1. personality makes someone want to be with you.
2. looks makes a person want to have sex with you.

you need a combination of both in order to have a good relationship.

[checking facts]

I'll speak by experience: I fell in love for the girl I'm currently in love with due to a mix of her pretty looks and sweet personality. I wouldn't have fallen for her if she looked like a dragon, and likewise I wouldn't like her if she was obnoxious. it's important to keep in mind that both looks and personality are very important on love.

sure, in theory looks only matter for sex. but what is love if not a tool of evolution to convince you to have sex and babies with someone and perpetuate your species? in the end, looks end up mattering for love.

so if your friend has good personality and bad looks, great: she knows where she must start working to make herself better. she has to fix her looks and try to keep the personality relatively unchanged.

[Kalis]

Perhaps she should ask a fat man with no personality...or did she?

[Deleted]

Is she perhaps eyeing up people with "less body mass" than herself? and perhaps ignoring the men that might actually like her, because they - like her have a little too much 'body mass'?

[Lovechile]

I have a female friend that is having problems with her body mass. She feels that men don't like her because of her weight. She doesn't understand why men can't just like her for who she is. The only reason why looks matter to most is because of sex. Other than sex looks will be pretty much almost useless. She then told me it should be about the personality and not the looks. I told her then that personality doesn't have anything to do with sex. I think men and women who have this type of argument are just lazy.


These are the facts:

1. personality makes someone want to be with you.
2. looks makes a person want to have sex with you.

you need a combination of both in order to have a good relationship.

You know, it takes ALL types to make this world run, and just because she is big doesn't mean that men aren't going to find her attractive. There are plenty of men ( and women) for that matter than find bigger men and women attractive. Personally, I wouldn't want to date a skinny guy. I've NEVER found smaller men attractive. I don't like muscled guys either. Something about snuggling with a a stick or a rock just doesn't do it for me.

Tell your friend that confidence is sexy. Dress cute, act cute, be confident and outgoing and witty, and it's not going to matter than she's big. Chubby chasers will come to her. I've never had a lack of men want me, it's just about knowing that not everyone is going to find me attractive, but that rings true even if you're skinny.

I might be taking this the wrong way, but your post has a aftertaste of "lulz my friend can't get a boyfriend cuz she's a fattie, what do?" Yes, you need a combination of both, however, in the long run, ESPECIALLY in a marriage or long term relationship, hot sex and hot bodies only go so far, and then sex isn't about getting off anymore, it's about the emotional connection you get when you have sex with someone you connect with on a personal level.

and inb4 "you're a fattie" because, yes. I am.

[Zamalamin]

You know, it takes ALL types to make this world run, and just because she is big doesn't mean that men aren't going to find her attractive. There are plenty of men ( and women) for that matter than find bigger men and women attractive. Personally, I wouldn't want to date a skinny guy. I've NEVER found smaller men attractive. I don't like muscled guys either. Something about snuggling with a a stick or a rock just doesn't do it for me.

Tell your friend that confidence is sexy. Dress cute, act cute, be confident and outgoing and witty, and it's not going to matter than she's big. Chubby chasers will come to her. I've never had a lack of men want me, it's just about knowing that not everyone is going to find me attractive, but that rings true even if you're skinny.

I might be taking this the wrong way, but your post has a aftertaste of "lulz my friend can't get a boyfriend cuz she's a fattie, what do?" Yes, you need a combination of both, however, in the long run, ESPECIALLY in a marriage or long term relationship, hot sex and hot bodies only go so far, and then sex isn't about getting off anymore, it's about the emotional connection you get when you have sex with someone you connect with on a personal level.

and inb4 "you're a fattie" because, yes. I am.

I agree with you there. However I would like to add that if she is going after guys that are muscled or whatever, and is set on dating a certain guy or whatever, then maybe she will need to trim up a bit. Because, she is obviously going after guys that don't like overweight women. So either she has to change her looks or change the guys she wants. I'm seeing a bit of a hypocritical undertone to the whole situation.

Anyways, it IS a Dydric post. So there's no real reason to care that much about it.

[Deleted]

Personality doesn't matter when it comes to sex? Are you kidding me? There needs to be trust and you can't trust someone with an ugly personality. You just can't. Mix of looks + personality is what matters. One alone does not do enough.

Also; Sounds like your friend is aiming too high in terms of what men she wants.

[Deleted]

I have a female friend that is having problems with her body mass. She feels that men don't like her because of her weight. She doesn't understand why men can't just like her for who she is. The only reason why looks matter to most is because of sex. Other than sex looks will be pretty much almost useless. She then told me it should be about the personality and not the looks. I told her then that personality doesn't have anything to do with sex. I think men and women who have this type of argument are just lazy.

These are the facts:

1. personality makes someone want to be with you.
2. looks makes a person want to have sex with you.

you need a combination of both in order to have a good relationship.

Load of bull. Your assumption is that everyone has the same sexual appetite as you do.

[Itisamuh]

Uhh, personality has a lot to do with wanting sex with someone. At least, it does to those of us who aren't pigs. Aside from that though, you're pretty much right. An ugly woman with the best personality in the world is someone I'd happily be friends with, but I wouldn't have the slightest desire for a relationship with her. The chemistry required to change a friendship into a relationship, for me, includes physical chemistry. As you said, without both, there's no point.

[Tradewind]

Pfft, you can't fuck a personality.

[bleh bleh 420 bleh]

Id say 75% of why you like someone should be personality minimum. 25% looks max. You do not want an attractive partner that you cant trust. But that being said you don't want to make love to a whale

[serenka]

i have to find someone physically attractive to date/sleep with them, and i dont find overweight people attractive. i like to take care of my appearance and i would like my partner to aswell. i think personality is important, but so are looks.

[zenyatta]

I can think of several heavier people in Hollywood that would have people lining up to get in their pants, men and women. You can have looks while having some extra baggage.

That said, I don't care if a guy is drop dead gorgeous - if he has a personality of a rock, I'll have 0 interest.

[pvtpyro]

Guys, who aren't pigs, will have sex with someone with a great personality. The real question is, is she gross? It's hard to get into someone who does not take care of themselves hygiene-wise. Does she spend time on herself? Does she put on make-up and do her hair? Does she smell nice? Those are more important that size from my experience.

[Deleted]

Ask her if she would date a really fat and ugly guy.

[Deleted]

Dydric.. What the fuck?

Haha DAT post history.

Infracted: Please post more constructively and contribute to the topic instead of making personal jabs at posters.

[Romeo83x]

Have you even had sex ? Sex is about a lot of things, looks is not one of them. Also fat girls try harder and are therefore much better in bed than skinny girls.

[Komati]

Someday I will have sex with a fat chick, to see have it is. Haven't gathered the curage to do so yet though, since fat chicks are usually ugly, in addition to being fat. I have to find that special someone who's both pretty and fat too.

[checking facts]

this thread reminds me of a picture I saw on the internet some time ago.

http://www.toonhole.com/comics/2011-...ersonality.jpg

[Xothic]

Pfft, you can't fuck a personality.

Laughed way too hard at this.