Girlfriend controlling behaviour.. warning sign? What should I do?

[munchkin]

EDIT1: We were at a party and I like to dance - she is very concerned about what people think about her, or about me, or anyone in here family - I had to remind her that, regardless of who you are, some people will like you and some will hate you - its just how the cookie crumbles. People are always prone to talk shit/gossip as well, so you can not live your life worrying all the time about what people may or may not think or say about you - the box comment was just so that I would "conform" to acting in certain ways especially in public so that she can feel good about herself. She doesn't like things she can not control, but I told her that we can't control everything.. some things we can, others not - just to be free. I hope this clears up some confusion.

Hello,

Been knowing my girlfriend for about 9 years as friends, been dating a little over a year. We had a discussion recently and it basically boiled down to her opening up about wanting to control things and have things go her way. To be blunt, she said that she sometimes wants to "put me in a little box to control me" - what does this mean and what should I do?

[Deleted]

Run.
/10chars

[Shennanigans]

To the curb and don't look back.

[-Skye]

Well their's very little details but if what you posted is her exact words the only advice I could give is be careful.

[Exeris]

If she really means that, it's a good time to leave.

[Zigen]

Run as fast as you can.

[Kisho]

It means you should talk to her, directly, rather than ask anonymous, faceless people on the internet. Many of whom are speaking from a very biased perspective (been hurt in their own relationships, never had a relationship, etc.).

All we have right now is an incredibly out of context quote that ultimately means nothing. It could've been a harmless joke. It could've been a sign that she really wants to control everything you do. We have no way of knowing, since the only way to know for sure is to talk to her directly.

So stop reading this thread, and GO TALK TO HER.

[Yami]

If it was me I would say you don't have enough badges to control me and run but pretty much what everyone else said be careful and it gets bad leave.

[Deleted]

It's not clear whether she thought it was a problem or not from your post. Why don't you ask her what she means? It might not be as bad as it sounds if she realises it's wrong.

[Kivimetsan]

Don't take her out of context, it could destroy what you have.
Just say "no, im my own boss" and if she doesn't like it, leave her.
Do you live with her? If you broke up would it impact your life? If nothing bad will happen, consider putting her in her place.
If not, try harder to gain back your freedom, don't end up homeless, its not worth it.

[Solidsteel]

Don't stick your dick in crazy.

[Gheld]

It sounds like you are taking her out of context, or she's being sarcastic and you're for whatever reason incapable of picking up on it.

[Reg]

Well it depends on your personality. Some people like the be the submissive type and fall in line. There has to be a line drawn though unless you want her picking out your clothes and lying them on the bed for you every morning. I know I could never do it, I have a very dominant personality.

I suggest just having a talk with her, let her know that you aren't her bitch and that you don't need your hand held. If she keeps it up, to the curb!!

[Zogarth]

Go talk to her... nobody here got enough information to make any call.

[Thelxi]

Bend over and ask for more. Afterwards tell her you love her. FIXED

[Kerath]

Too little context/info.
It's perfectly feasible that she's aware her controlling urge is out of line and has no intention of acting on it.
Talk to her, set some boundaries/ground rules, make it clear that you're your own person and have no desire to be controlled (if that's how you feel), see how things work out.

[zoefschildpad]

Is she actually actively controlling you?

I know I often want to punch someone in the face, doesn't mean I go and do it.

[Promark]

You have known her 9 years, you should probably already know how she behaves. Has she never dated anyone in those 9 years? How did she act towards them? Why did they break up? If you are still wondering, talk to her about it, ask her friends if it still isn't clear.

[Jawless Jones]

drop it like its hot

unless you're into that sort of stuff ofc

[Nillah]

If it was me I would say you don't have enough badges to control me and run but pretty much what everyone else said be careful and it gets bad leave.

Bahaha.

But seriously, if she wasn't joking, run.