A little problem

[tjesk]

Hello, I'm 18years old and I have this problem. Today I got an job offer at a local store, and if I accept it I'm going to work there two days a week. But I have this problem that I always feel like I'm going to emberras myself. The same thing goes for my driver license, I can't stand the feeling sitting in a car with total strangers while learning to drive. I would probably get really nervous and start shaking like crazy. When I took the licens for my scooter I was really nervous when I was driving and managed to mess up a little by driving on a red light etc. because I was so nervous. So yeah, I always think about what to do so I do it correct, and if I for an example sit in the cash register and there's a long line I would get so emberrased if I have to call for help if something goes wrong. I'm always like this in situations where other people depend on me. I'm not a socially awkward person, I have a lot of friends, and I'm amongst the popular kids in call. If anything got any tips or any idea on how to overcome this I would really appreciate any help.
Thanks in advance.

[Djuntas]

We'll, they can't exspect good performence from you the first weeks surely, or does the store demand that from first time appliers, or how you could put it.

Surely they will cut you some slack, if you aint up to speed Get what you mean trough, we all want to do good, and not look helpless and stupid hehe.

[Rukentuts]

Who cares if you embarrass yourself in front of strangers you never have to see again?

[Lenonis]

To be honest it sounds like you have a low-mid level anxiety disorder. It's not really normal to get so anxious at the idea of being judged or needing assistance that you end up shaking and become unable to function. Have you given any thought about talking to a doc about possibly needing anti-anxiety medications?

That aside, just realize that everyone knows you are new and they will expect you to need help and make mistakes. Just relax and do your best and you'll be up to speed in what seems like no time at all.

[tjesk]

Who cares if you embarrass yourself in front of strangers you never have to see again?

It's a local store, I'm probably going to seem them all again sometime.

[Reeve]

Basically, you're really nervous the first time it happens. Maybe the second, then as it happens more you get used to it and realize it's normal, become comfortable, and move on. The best way to get over nervousness is just to do the thing that makes you nervous.

- - - Updated - - -

To be honest it sounds like you have a low-mid level anxiety disorder. It's not really normal to get so anxious at the idea of being judged or needing assistance that you end up shaking and become unable to function. Have you given any thought about talking to a doc about possibly needing anti-anxiety medications?

That aside, just realize that everyone knows you are new and they will expect you to need help and make mistakes. Just relax and do your best and you'll be up to speed in what seems like no time at all.

There have been things in my life I was so nervous I was shaking about. Only a couple times, but I went ahead and did them anyway, and they stopped making me nervous. To me, an anxiety disorder would be if they continued to make him nervous even after he's been doing those things for a long time.

But I'm no psychologist. I just hate the idea of medicating someone for something that they can get over without medication.

[Deleted]

Go to see a doctor.

/thread

[Rukentuts]

It's a local store, I'm probably going to seem them all again sometime.

But why care what they think? They're just strangers.

[Reeve]

Go to see a doctor.

/thread

Why not try to work it out yourself first, and if it doesn't work after a few weeks, then go see a doctor?

I mean the OP says he's pretty comfortable in day to day life, has lots of friends, etc. This sounds like normal nervousness to me, not some disorder.

[Lenonis]

But I'm no psychologist. I just hate the idea of medicating someone for something that they can get over without medication.

I threw that out because he implied that he gets nervous like this in a variety of situations and to the point where he can't function. That's the part that triggered my concern as I have friends who have anxiety disorders and were not able to live a normal life until they got medication to help. It might not be needed but it's not normal to be routinely put in situations where you get so nervous you can't function.

He might have been overstating the issue, but my experience is that if anything people tend to understate these sorts of things.

[Reeve]

I threw that out because he implied that he gets nervous like this in a variety of situations and to the point where he can't function. That's the part that triggered my concern as I have friends who have anxiety disorders and were not able to live a normal life until they got medication to help. It might not be needed but it's not normal to be routinely put in situations where you get so nervous you can't function.

He might have been overstating the issue, but my experience is that if anything people tend to understate these sorts of things.

He said he was nervous about learning to drive, and nervous about his first job. Those are both extremely normal things to get nervous about, and some people shake when they're really nervous. It's not impossible that he has a disorder, but it didn't sound like it from the OP to me, since that's the sort of thing I went through and got over pretty quickly just by getting used to doing the things involved.

[Lenonis]

I mean the OP says he's pretty comfortable in day to day life, has lots of friends, etc. This sounds like normal nervousness to me, not some disorder.

Anxiety disorders can be strangely specific in nature. One friend of mine, for instance, is perfectly fine around friends. Put him in a room full of strangers though and he completely freaks out without his meds. He simply can't go to a bar, for example, without them. You'd never know it from seeing him interact with his friends.

Other people have different triggers. I'm not a psychologist so I'm not saying that is what is going on here, but it seems that interacting with strangers, especially those who might judge him triggers an unusually high level of anxiety for him.

[tjesk]

When I for an example were driving in the city for the first time alone, I got nervous of doing something wrong while driving and then ofc. my hands started to shake and I got chills, that's also another thing that happens each time, I get the chills and then my hand start shaking. But when I was driving around in the city with my friends it went great, didn't notice anything.

[Deleted]

I recently got a similar job and really you just have to overcome it, you have to not fear making a mistake because until a transaction is finalized it can be corrected very easily, just gotta take your time and be sure of what you have to do. It also helps to not be afraid to ask questions, most employers would rather you ask and then get it right than get it wrong without asking.

[tjesk]

Thanks for the help. I'm going to talk to my mother tomorrow and tell her how it is and we'll see what I'll do next.

[Mayhem]

Thanks for the help. I'm going to talk to my mother tomorrow and tell her how it is and we'll see what I'll do next.

that´s a very good idea, in fact, you should´ve done that prior to posting here

btw. i have similar problems, good thing, i don´t need a drivers license *pheew*

[Ultima]

Don't be afraid to ask questions. You will make mistakes. You will learn from those mistakes.