Polyamoury, why the stigma?

[ringpriest]

sharing my partner with someone like that destroys the value of the relationship. how can there be anything special between you an the other person, if there's also something special between them and another? i could never love someone while we both love someone else as well.

So, parents can only love one child? Children can only love one parent? Veterans don't feel a sense of fellowship with everyone in their unit? (Your shift key can't love multiple letters, which is why you don't use it?) Love isn't a finite resource (although attention and time are). You don't have to love one person less because you love someone else, too. Love is more than being the center of someone else's attention.

[Egoism]

I don't care who you bang, but poly isn't a sexual orientation, and marriage is a 1:1 institution for logistical reasons. This restriction doesn't infringe on any sexual orientation.

Not sure if self contradictory, I never said it was an orientation, nobody did, what the hell are you talking about?

[Rukentuts]

Not sure if self contradictory, I never said it was an orientation, nobody did, what the hell are you talking about?

Heading off the poly marriage argument.

[Egoism]

So, parents can only love one child? Children can only love one parent? Veterans don't feel a sense of fellowship with everyone in their unit? (Your shift key can't love multiple letters, which is why you don't use it?) Love isn't a finite resource (although attention and time are). You don't have to love one person less because you love someone else, too. Love is more than being the center of someone else's attention.

Pst, they might not know that the world doesnt revolve around them yet.

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Heading off the poly marriage argument.

Ah, the "People will cheat the system" argument, I believe.

Don't they already do that?

[Rukentuts]

Ah, the "People will cheat the system" argument, I believe.

Don't they already do that?

No, it's 1:1 because a divorce of 3:1 or more would be an absolute logistical nightmare. We already have family courts bogged down in 1:1 as-is. Could you imagine custody hearings of four parents or more? It would be billions more a year in family courts' time, not to mention lawyer fees. In addition to splitting property, alimony, etc. It's just a nightmare.

[Cthulhu 2020]

Just exaggerating the point made, being possessive isnt harmful in and of itself, but leads to mistrust and paranoia if left unchecked.

If you have to exaggerate to make a point, then it's not really a point at all. People can be possessive of someone's romantic love without being possessive of platonic love.

I am personally monogamous entirely by choice. If I felt like being polyamorous, I would be honest about it. That's what's wrong with it. Not any of the reasons people have listed. Not that they'd be a bad parent or anything like that, but because they just aren't honest people. They'd make a bad parent, be a bad lover, etc. not because they are polyamorous but because they are dishonest.

[derpkitteh]

So, parents can only love one child? Children can only love one parent? Veterans don't feel a sense of fellowship with everyone in their unit? (Your shift key can't love multiple letters, which is why you don't use it?) Love isn't a finite resource (although attention and time are). You don't have to love one person less because you love someone else, too. Love is more than being the center of someone else's attention.

romantic love is completely different of any of those. you wouldn't fuck your parents or brother would you? your child? of course not.

[Spectral]

Polyamory is probably nice for some people. I think the vast majority of "polyamory" is actually just, "I'd like to fuck other people, but I don't want to just say that, so I'll say that I have this orientation that's all about love, so you can't judge!".

[Cthulhu 2020]

No, it's 1:1 because a divorce of 3:1 or more would be an absolute logistical nightmare. We already have family courts bogged down in 1:1 as-is. Could you imagine custody hearings of four parents or more? It would be billions more a year in family courts' time, not to mention lawyer fees. In addition to splitting property, alimony, etc. It's just a nightmare.

That and it would make more work/jobs for lawyers, and fuck those guys making any more money or being more in demand than they already are.

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Polyamory is probably nice for some people. I think the vast majority of "polyamory" is actually just, "I'd like to fuck other people, but I don't want to just say that, so I'll say that I have this orientation that's all about love, so you can't judge!".

Basically. Polyamory isn't bad in itself. It's the dishonesty.

[Rukentuts]

That and it would make more work/jobs for lawyers, and fuck those guys making any more money or being more in demand than they already are.

I don't give a fuck about money for lawyers. I care about it bogging down dockets and costing the taxpayers shitloads.

[Egoism]

romantic love is completely different of any of those. you wouldn't fuck your parents or brother would you? your child? of course not.

This implies that you need romantic love for sex, you do not.

[Rukentuts]

This implies that you need romantic love for sex, you do not.

Speak for yourself.

[Egoism]

Polyamory is probably nice for some people. I think the vast majority of "polyamory" is actually just, "I'd like to fuck other people, but I don't want to just say that, so I'll say that I have this orientation that's all about love, so you can't judge!".

Again, most people can tell the difference between a slut, and a serious polyamourous person.

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Speak for yourself.

I also just realized that what I said might be construed as an argument for incest, that is not what I was implying.

[Rukentuts]

I also just realized that what I said might be construed as an argument for incest, that is not what I was implying.

I was addressing it as a standpoint of a SO to whom you're not blood related.

[Spectral]

Again, most people can tell the difference between a slut, and a serious polyamourous person.

The ratio between these seems to about 3747:1. Personally, I have no problem with sluttery and open relationships, but it's awfully silly to pretend that it's an orientation rather than a basic human desire to fuck.

[ringpriest]

I don't care who you bang, but poly isn't a sexual orientation, and marriage is a 1:1 institution for logistical reasons. This restriction doesn't infringe on any sexual orientation.

Do you have kids? It's a hell of a lot easier to deal with small children with more than 1-2 adults in the family. Poly household mean more people to split up the housework, more people to pay the bills, more time flexibility for everything from work schedules to a night out on the town. It means more financial stability and more income streams. If marriage existed only for logistical reasons, polyamory ought to be mandatory!

[Rukentuts]

but it's awfully silly to pretend that it's an orientation rather than a basic human desire to fuck.

People seem to not understand what an orientation is versus a fetish.

[derpkitteh]

This implies that you need romantic love for sex, you do not.

without romantic love, sex is hollow. it might as well be masturbation.

[Rukentuts]

Do you have kids? It's a hell of a lot easier to deal with small children with more than 1-2 adults in the family. Poly household mean more people to split up the housework, more people to pay the bills, more time flexibility for everything from work schedules to a night out on the town. It means more financial stability and more income streams. If marriage existed only for logistical reasons, polyamory ought to be mandatory!

Logistical reasons on the matter of divorce, which over half of marriages result in.

[Xanjori]

without romantic love, sex is hollow. it might as well be masturbation.

To you. If you can't understand people are different then go live in a cave.