The obsession with communication

[StayTuned]

Ah man, how stupid. I pressed post thread instead of preview thread before I was done writing it.... Give me pls some time to finish this

Done.

Within the last decade or so, our daily lives have changed drastically. With an almost entire world connected through the internet and other media, the sense of being connected with each other has found a comfy place within our brains.

Media Usage Up 800% For U.S. Online Adults In Just 8 Years

http://www.forbes.com/sites/steveolenski/2013/09/06/social-media-usage-up-800-for-us-online-adults-in-just-8-years/

The benefits of increased communication are quite obvious. Protection of Freedom of Speech, a better understanding and solving of global issues and private entertainment, among others.

But lets talk about new issues which have risen on a more private scale since the introduction of Facebook, WhatsApp, Twitter and co.

This study here suggests that, on average, it takes us about 6 minutes to answer to a received message even if the question itself is absolutely not important. I find this staggering. Answering to just about anything took us much longer in the times of phone, physical mail and pagers.

With this speed comes a sense of obligation to answer as fast as possible. Because it is so easy to reach you, people almost seem to be expecting answers.

What does this implicate? Are we moving towards a full inter-connection where people can't even take a week off, just for themselves, without the world around them crumbling?

I did a small anecdotal experiment by turning all of my electronics off for a day (24 hours straight). Lo and behold, it got me the police called by my girlfriend who though I was dead. My parents, who are not in contact with my girlfriend, left me 10 WhatsApp and 6 Facebook messages over the course of just a couple of hours with a lot of indicated panic in their texts. Some people from university even told me to stop being a jerk and finally answer to their questions - after not even one day of ignoring people.

I find this absolutely horrifying. Either people have become more demanding and anxious, or Social Media has just become a tool for people to be more in control of others; from your closest relatives who just want to know if you are still alive to the professionals who use it as a marketing tool to sell their goods and services to you.

What are your thoughts?

[Avada Kedavra]

I agree with the internet. There was a couple days last week where I had no phone or internets. It was a horrible experience. I had to play with my cats.

[Deleted]

I never sent a single text message all this year, I prefer to call people.

[Deleted]

I like the fast communication, without stuff like facebook to share summaries and notes from class, it would be very hard to beat my exams in januari.
Ofcoarse the downside of it being that you don't have an excuse for missing a deadline because you didn't hear their was one.

[Darsithis]

I prefer fast communication. I like that when I'm out doing our food shopping for the week, I can text my partner and get a reply pretty much instantly to decide on something that wasn't in the list. I like being able to change or make plans on the fly. I like being able to be notified of an issue at one of our client's stores immediately so I can hop on my laptop and push out a code fix.

But it does introduce issues, just like what we see here: people think they're anonymous. They think they can say anything they want with no repercussions. It's hard to disseminate truth from fiction, especially on an ever-changing medium like the internet.

[Itisamuh]

I agree, it's a bit ridiculous. I don't want to socialize all day every day, but now it's expected that I respond immediately. I'd always thought the whole point of texting instead of talking was so you didn't have to respond right then and there. If it's going to be a back and forth, fully engaged conversation, might as well just talk by voice. Either way though, I agree that people are way too obsessed with socializing.

[Deleted]

I did a small anecdotal experiment by turning all of my electronics off for a day. Low and behold, it got me the police called by my girlfriend who though I was dead. My parents, who are not in contact with my girlfriend, left me 10 WhatsApp and 6 Facebook messages over the course of just a couple of hours with a lot of indicated panic in their texts. Some people from university even told me to stop being a jerk and finally answer to their questions - after not even one day of ignoring people.

I find this absolutely horrifying. Either people have become more demanding and anxious, or Social Media has just become a tool for people to be more in control of others; from your closest relatives who just want to know if you are still alive to the professionals who use it as a marketing tool to sell their goods and services to you.

What are your thoughts?

initial reaction: holy shit you hang around with clingy people! my parents talk to me maybe twice a week, my friends (depends on when i see them) usually around 3-4 times a week, and i live with my girlfriend so i do talk to her every day...

i like faster communication, but i'm not obsessed with it, i like to think i have a comfortable balance in my life

[Darsithis]

What does this implicate? Are we moving towards a full inter-connection where people can't even take a week off, just for themselves, without the world around them crumbling?

Short answer: yes.

At my job I'm one of two people that can assist with production issues of our software. Two. If we're not available, the client suffers and loses business. We have to plan our vacations opposite of each other. Even when I'm on vacation I don't ever remove myself completely from being in contact with my company. I can't. The itch, the drive, the need to be aware of what is going on is too great now.

[belfpala]

At my job I'm one of two people that can assist with production issues of our software. Two. If we're not available, the client suffers and loses business. We have to plan our vacations opposite of each other. Even when I'm on vacation I don't ever remove myself completely from being in contact with my company. I can't. The itch, the drive, the need to be aware of what is going on is too great now.

I'm in a very different profession, but even so, I get probably 30 calls or text messages from work every day when I'm not there. In a way, that's a good thing; I can manage from a distance. In another way, it's exhausting and I often feel chained to my phone. Like, to the point that I have a minor panic attack if I realize I left it at home when I went out on some errands and haven't been able to check it for an hour.

Overall, I think communication speed is a great thing though. I couldn't be chatting with the lot of you people across the world like this otherwise.

[Ciddy]

I never sent a single text message all this year, I prefer to call people.

Same here. I'd rather have a 15-second conversation than spend 10 minutes sending text messages back and forth. Even more annoying is when someone sends me a text message, then I start getting "HELLO???" messages if I haven't responded within a minute. I got a "What took you so long to respond?" message over a 15-minute response time at work once.

I do agree with the OP though. It almost makes me miss the days before everyone had a cell phone. Almost.

[Deleted]

It's only going to be a situational problem or affect people who are already prone to something else in that suggested area of such behavior.

All that convinience does - is bring in more suspects to the offense.

[belfpala]

Same here. I'd rather have a 15-second conversation than spend 10 minutes sending text messages back and forth.

It depends for me.

Email: thing that I don't expect a response to for a day.
Text: thing I want the other person to see very soon, but don't know if it's a good time to call them.
Call: something that has to be right now.

[Gheld]

Short answer: yes.

At my job I'm one of two people that can assist with production issues of our software. Two. If we're not available, the client suffers and loses business. We have to plan our vacations opposite of each other. Even when I'm on vacation I don't ever remove myself completely from being in contact with my company. I can't. The itch, the drive, the need to be aware of what is going on is too great now.

< 3 @ Signature.

OT: I mean I like fast communication too. But the OPs girlfriend is an extreme situation. I'd like to think that most people have the sense to realize not everybody feels compelled to check their phone constantly.

The situation smells of people fearing new technological improvements to their every day life. Improvements are good. That's why they are called improvements. But at the same time, you have to allow yourself some disconnect time every now and then.

I have this one friend, her and I were like BFFs for a long time. But she got wound up in the whole "Always connected" thing. So in an effort to be friends with all 400+ people on her Facebook list she has turned in to the most inattentive absentee friend I have now. From BFF's to frigid bitch just like that.

The human brain has limited capacity for social relationships. So it is possible to become overly social; and technology makes that easier than ever. But I don't blame the technology. I blame the user.

[Deleted]

[S]
I did a small anecdotal experiment by turning all of my electronics off for a day. Low and behold, it got me the police called by my girlfriend who though I was dead. My parents, who are not in contact with my girlfriend, left me 10 WhatsApp and 6 Facebook messages over the course of just a couple of hours with a lot of indicated panic in their texts. Some people from university even told me to stop being a jerk and finally answer to their questions - after not even one day of ignoring people.

I find this absolutely horrifying. Either people have become more demanding and anxious, or Social Media has just become a tool for people to be more in control of others; from your closest relatives who just want to know if you are still alive to the professionals who use it as a marketing tool to sell their goods and services to you.

What are your thoughts?

LOL what the hell was my first thought. How can they panic so quickly, it took 2 days for my parents before they called the police. I was thinking that 2 days was too fast..

It is horrifying, i usually call my friends like couple times a week or if i have something really important to say. I'm not panicking or getting angry if i don't hear about them in few days.

[belfpala]

Just read the full edit on the OP... that's insane. I can't think of anyone I know who would react that way if I was out of contact for days, or even a couple weeks. Outside of work-related messages, I often don't respond to emails or facebook messages or voice mails for several days. People know this about me.

Crazy.

[Deleted]

Same here. I'd rather have a 15-second conversation than spend 10 minutes sending text messages back and forth. Even more annoying is when someone sends me a text message, then I start getting "HELLO???" messages if I haven't responded within a minute. I got a "What took you so long to respond?" message over a 15-minute response time at work once.

I do agree with the OP though. It almost makes me miss the days before everyone had a cell phone. Almost.

I like text messages because they allow you to answer whenever you see fit, a phonecall you need to pick up immediatly if you don't want to call them back.
However I do share your frustrations with texts, but phonecalls have their part of frustrations aswell. Sometimes I like to not be available, its why I refuse to install FB on my smartphone.

[Darsithis]

I did a small anecdotal experiment by turning all of my electronics off for a day. Low and behold, it got me the police called by my girlfriend who though I was dead. My parents, who are not in contact with my girlfriend, left me 10 WhatsApp and 6 Facebook messages over the course of just a couple of hours with a lot of indicated panic in their texts. Some people from university even told me to stop being a jerk and finally answer to their questions - after not even one day of ignoring people.

I didn't even notice this part.

Dude, new girlfriend. That is way too excessive. That's creepy. That's stalkerish. That's...I don't even have words.

[Gheld]

I like text messages because they allow you to answer whenever you see fit, a phonecall you need to pick up immediatly if you don't want to call them back.
However I do share your frustrations with texts, but phonecalls have their part of frustrations aswell. Sometimes I like to not be available, its why I refuse to install FB on my smartphone.

Yeah. Actual phone calls almost have this self-important narcissistic feel behind them these days.

A text message says "Get me back whenever." a phone call says "YOU WILL ANSWER ME, RIGHT NOW." and half the time people who do phone don't have anything that important to say anyways.

[Voodoou]

My issues is similar but on a different rant.. those DAMNED scan barcode things ON EVERYTHING!! that you need a smart phone(or a 3DS) to scan.. I have no need at all for a smart phone and I refuse to carry around my 3DS in case I drop and I dont really have a need to carry it! Those damned barcodes are even on art displays in my city's park!! My cell phone is one of those old throw away POSs LG put out 5+ years ago and I only have it for pure emergencies.

I do pretty much everything online from home so internet is my crutch but its more because I like to play games and am disabled so really its how I stay in touch with the world. I would be a little lost without it but I have a lan line and my family has my number =P

[fooliuscaesar13]

At one time, I was absolutely fascinated with instant communication and being in constant contact with everyone. It had a way of feeling like I was being social even when I really wasn't...which was great for my social semi-awkwardness. This was also about 3 or 4 years ago. I've never been the type that enjoyed talking on the telephone, so text messaging/IM/email is great for me, so is talking to people in-person (which is what I actually prefer, social semi-awkwardness aside).

These days...I try to stay off of the grid as much as possible. I tend to avoid social media for days at a time and except for browsing my local newspaper websites I stay away from the news as well. I'm done trying to "change people's political ideas" and I'm done trying to force my opinion down people's throats. We either agree or not these days and honestly my wellspring of give-a-fuck has run dry.

I remember seeing a quote on facebook that went something along these lines:
"As a kid, I wanted to be able to know what everyone was thinking. Now we have facebook and I wish I didn't know anything"

Not verbatim, but you get the idea. And that's where I'm at with all of this connectivity these days: I had a lot more faith in people (and generally enjoyed them more) when I was ignorant to how much of a selfish dick (myself included...I'm not perfect) everyone on this planet is. Reading all of it has made me an ever bigger cynic than I previously was. I miss having faith in others.