The fuck is this girls deal?

[Mic_128]

She wasn't happy.

If you respected the other partner you would of refused, or told her to wait until she split up

Of course, this also applies to her. If she respected the other partner she would of refused, or told him to wait until she split up

[Electroso]

Oh come on.

Walk a mile in my shoes for a minute. We're childhood friends. I stopped it the first time. She kept wanting to hang out and I CONTINUED to not let it go there.

I then invited her to a gathering of my friends and the next thing I know shes in my bed talking about her sexual preferences.

A majority of people would have done the same.

I'm with you man. If a girl is in my bed talking about sexual preferences who am i to say NO if I can clearly see she wants Other than that I would call her and tell her whats on my mind and if she doesn't want to be together oh well time to move on to the next girl while she takes her time and walks back for me :P

[Deleted]

Isn't this Victim blaming?

How so, please elaborate.

[Whidbey]

1: yes it was wrong for you to go there when you know she was in a serious relationship.
2: it was wrong for her to go there.
3: sometimes people in a LTR do stupid things, like test the unknown waters to see if they missed out on anything. It's a reason for her actions not an excuse.
4: don't expect to hear from her, or her to ever mention it again. Don't bring it up either, as she is probably embarrassed or humiliated she went there after the fact.
5: I would not read anything into it emotionally as its a done deal and over with.

[Ghaleon]

Stand by your car outside her window holding a boombox playing the song In your eyes by peter gabriel make sure the volume is high

[Deleted]

Of course, this also applies to her. If she respected the other partner she would of refused, or told him to wait until she split up

Indeed, brilliant thing i'm noting both of their involvement.

[LilSaihah]

How so, please elaborate.

Women have a mystical power over men to appropriate sex from them.

"You will sleep with me." /handwave

[Deleted]

How so, please elaborate.

"Just because a portion of people would of done the same, does nothing to justify what occurred.

She's a coward, a cheater, and you enabled it. "

Memory just retails me back to threads where i pulled logical arguments - Yet all i got was blinded rage of how i was victim blaming.

How strange, yet familiar - to see the same cirucmstances dawn upon me.

Sadly, however, i see your point of view. And thus, cannot blame.

[Deleted]

"Just because a portion of people would of done the same, does nothing to justify what occurred.

She's a coward, a cheater, and you enabled it. "

Memory just retails me back to threads where i pulled logical arguments - Yet all i got was blinded rage of how i was victim blaming.

How strange, yet familiar - to see the same cirucmstances dawn upon me.

Sadly, however, i see your point of view. And thus, cannot blame.

Both of them consented to the intercourse knowing full well the circumstances, using other peoples morally ambiguous claims of doing likewise is not justification that gives it mythical light blinding me to the scummy behavior.

She wanted sex, he gave her it.

She is a cheater, he enabled it.

He's a victim in the sense he didn't get to tap it in the morning, that's about it though.

[THE Bigzoman]

sometimes people in a LTR do stupid things, like test the unknown waters to see if they missed out on anything. It's a reason for her actions not an excuse.

Oh, she'll be back then.

I haven't had that much stamina since my HS wrestling days. And i'm confident that I didn't perform poorly. Friend in the living room was texting me tell me to keep her quiet (huehuehue)

[Deleted]

Both of them consented to the intercourse knowing full well the circumstances, using other peoples morally ambiguous claims of doing likewise is not justification that gives it mythical light blinding me to the scummy behavior.

She wanted sex, he gave her it.

She is a cheater, he enabled it.

He's a victim in the sense he didn't get to tap it in the morning, that's about it though.

Ah, but truly now - is the world so black and white when it comes to lust and friendship? Surely, you must know at some level - that it is only true in theory. That to condemnd on such basis, is too extreme to actually argue anything of realistic value.

Lest you somehow imagine people chastized and forever loyal. Which is not the natural order of humans nature.

Principals and condemnding on them is a treacherous patch. Absolutes do not covert well into reality.

[Hanto]

Sounds like she's been wanting it, and once it happened, she felt really guilty for cheating and up and left without saying a word and not talking to you anymore.

[Charge me Doctor]

Oh come on.

Walk a mile in my shoes for a minute. We're childhood friends. I stopped it the first time. She kept wanting to hang out and I CONTINUED to not let it go there.

I then invited her to a gathering of my friends and the next thing I know shes in my bed talking about her sexual preferences.

A majority of people would have done the same.

You should dump her, you both was in relationship and you both acted irresponsibly. Now deal with consequence, be a grown up. Call her and say if you want to continue or to stop these kind of things. In my opinion, you shouldn't do that, as soon as she started to "talking about sexual preferences" you should stand up and pour cold water on her. If you are a "childhood friends" it doesn't matter by the way.

[THE Bigzoman]

Yep. Believe it or not - I'm not a presumptios d'ck. I just happen to read what you are doing and know of quite of a lot of people who do the same.
I never take pride in saying people will bog down in doing the same thing.

But neither do i take enjoyment in trying to lie to them about what they ARE doing and how it is going for them.

Some things you just live to accept. Others you change.

You're right. But it's not like i go around looking for women already taken to get into these emotional wrecks.

One that I originally broke it off with came to me for help and I couldn't just walk away from it. What began as a good gesture thrusted me into a weird friendship that i'm unsure about in terms of direction.

The other was a childhood friend that I was doing everything in my power to remain friends until this sunday.


From the outside looking in, I look like a player. But frankly, i'm a victim of my own selflessness.

The road to hell is really paved in good intentions.

[Charge me Doctor]

You are not a victim, don't act like one. You had all chances to, you know, not have sex. It's like "hey, this car was open i couldn't help but to steal it!"

[KaylaFox]

My experience with seeing friends go through this is:

Someone who will cheat on someone else to be in a relationship with you, will probably cheat on you with someone else later.

If you want to keep having a fling with her, make sure you both understand it's just that. I would say getting into a relationship with her will just end badly.

/yourmove

[Spraxle]

The fact is she did this with you on her current boyfriend. If you ask her to leave him for you and she does she will do the same thing to you that she did to him: sleep with some other guy down the road. You thought with your dick and she well... she probably has some issues that she isn't resolving very well so she put herself in this position. I would be willing to bet she is tired of her current 'long term' boyfriend for any of a multitude of reasons. Of course when you to had sex that might have been a 'wake up call' to her and that's why she has broken off contact with you.

You have two options: 1)You contact her and tell her how you feel and that you need to know how she feels about you in return or 2)Just let it go and don't contact her anymore.

Edit: after reading more of your posts I can see you're delusional. If you actually believe what you're typing in this thread then I just have to shake my head. You are not a victim, you are not a player, you ARE a child who can't control himself and is trying to play the blame game so you can attempt to look like a good guy. Guess what, you are not a good guy if you willingly sleep with someone who is in a relationship, even if they 'thrust themselves at you' you can always say no. When you say yes well, you're the ass.

[-Zait-]

That's a super toxic situation. You shouldn't have gone for it, even if she was giving you the greenlight. Give her space to figure things out, call her in a few days.

[THE Bigzoman]

You are not a victim, don't act like one. You had all chances to, you know, not have sex. It's like "hey, this car was open i couldn't help but to steal it!"

Fine.

I'm a willing victim.

Buts thats as far as i'm going.

I need Ron Burgandy's take.

[Mavecryst]

The other was a childhood friend that I was doing everything in my power to remain friends until this sunday.

From the outside looking in, I look like a player. But frankly, i'm a victim of my own selflessness.

The road to hell is really paved in good intentions.

I did sympathise with you (to some extent) until this point. Please. A "victim of your own selflessness?". That's bull. If you were truly selfless, the moment the context of sex appeared (bedroom setting, bed conversation) you would have removed yourself from the situation. While I do not have the same amount of history with a friend as you did yours, I was put in a similar situation recently, where I had even more of an excuse to let go; this friend of mine had already broken up with her boyfriend.

I still refused, because I knew that would be possibly be the end of the friendship, and more importantly, because I knew she'd hate herself in the morning. I made it doubtlessly clear that nothing would happen, that I would continue to be available as a friend only, and left.

You have not acknowledged that you have always been at least mildly attracted to this girl. That was the reason you eventually caved. If all you wanted to do was maintain a friendship, that's all you would have done. You didn't "accidentally" fall into her vagina.

That being said, I know it's not so easy to refuse sometimes. It is tempting. You fell for the temptation this time. You're human, I get that. I'm not going to condemn you (the victim comment just irritated me :P) and say you're unforgivable or anything. But I'm pretty sure you know what your appropriate actions should be from here on out. It's up to you whether you want to let your moment of weakness perpetuate into something worse, or get back on the better path.