A feminists opinion of fedora'd gentleman

[Theinquisition]

She isn't spot on though, shes just listing some random stereotypes she read on the internet. Do the same thing about colour of skin and it's hate...just stop making these threads all together, growing tired of all these "fix our society" threads. (this isn't aimed at OP but to the forums in general.

Whew I was going to say.......I don't usually make those kind of threads.

[Sunseeker]

"Don't dress slutty and you won't look like a slut, but I'm not telling you how to dress."

I think I've heard this argument before. The answer is the same: people who make assumptions about your person based on your dress, particularly an individual item of clothing, are people you probably don't want to associate with anyway.

Frankly I don't get the fedora as a style choice, I have a fedora (which some people confuse with a fedora), but it's my fishing hat that I got from my dad years ago and it's not something I'd wear to "impress the ladies"...unless you're a lady who's impressed by me sitting in a foldable chair on a lakeside with a hat over my eyes and a beer in my cup-holder who naps while waiting for the bell on my fishing pole to dingle, if so then ladies, come at me! Otherwise I have an assortment of nice hats that I wear for the right occassion, and being "out west", most of them are cowboy styled. But they are dress hats I wear to look nice in or keep the snow off my head, again, not something I wear to impress women.

Personally, there's a ridiculous double standard around the whole "nice guy" thing. Women want men who are polite (and really, who doesn't want a respectful, well-mannered partner, male or female?), but there is an overt and immediate distrust of nice men, as this article illustrates, a pervasive assumption among women that there is a "subtext" to any man's actions regarding women. Yes, being nice is one way to get in a woman's pants just as much as being crude is (and a surprisingly effective way I might add, though don't expect anything lasting from this approach), but the key is always honesty in intent. "Nice guys" (the ones who really arent) are dishonest about their intentions, they want to get in women's pants, but pretend they don't. You can be nice and polite about wanting to get with a woman, and still be totally honest about it. There is nothing impolite about being clear with your intentions, it's all about how you express that intention. People who act like it's rude or crass to be honest, even if that honesty is in desiring something sexual, are the people that make this all an issue in the first place.

It's double standards on both sides of the table that create these situations to begin with.

*edited from tribly to fedora after the reference image in this thread. That's annoyingly confusing.

[nextormento]

Make the arbitrary connection fedoras = nice guys.
Start labeling nice guys as fedora wearers.
Popularize the trend through social media.
Come back a few months later and assert that people wearing fedoras are out of touch: with the trend that they initiated.

Talk about tautologies.


I'm incentivized now to start wearing fedoras: it might filter out femi-imbeciles from my dating horizon.

[Theinquisition]

I wear a suit at work by default and when it rains I sport a fedora. I love the way I look with a fedora and I don't give a shit if the obscure symbology of my dress style offends some internet preacher who doesn't even know what feminism is actually about.

at least you have the good sense to wear the hat with formal clothes.

[Lesali]

Pictures of people from the 40s are definitely the best way to defend your hat choice.

[Dezerte]

Seriously... If a woman avoids you because of your headwear, be very, very happy.

This too, seems very shallow and indicative of their personality.

[PuppetShowJustice]

I own a fedora and I don't care what anybody thinks. It makes my hair look amazing.

[Khaza-R]

Well I think the irony is that the Feminist is saying that alot of these guys are "self proclaimed" nice guys, and is generally not the case.

I think it is. Why don't woman like "nice guys" again? Because they learn from society that its okay for men to engage in immoral behavior in a relationship. "Bad boys" are even considered more desirable if they do so. Yet if a woman did the same she would labeled a bitch or a slut. You would think a real feminist would praise the "nice guy" for breaking the gender norms.

[Deleted]

My policy on hats is that if you wear one inside you are a cunt. Fact. So how did you 'just stumble' on this article anyway tony? Thats the real question that needs answering here.

[Deleted]

Whew I was going to say.......I don't usually make those kind of threads.

I found it rather weird seeing you as the OP for this...shame on you! :P

[Sky High]

THAT is the difference that people need to understand. they are two COMPLETELY different hats. and yes I would only wear a fedora if I were in some really nice suit or for Indy cosplay.

OT, I agree with the author. there are a bunch of horny men that can't get over a woman not wanting a hot piece of their man meat. and some of them like to wear that stupid ass hat. people need to be calling out these "nice guys" on a daily business, cuz I'm willing to bet they are the same troggs that leave awful comments about women all over the internet.

[Kraenen]

I think it is. Why don't woman like "nice guys" again? Because they learn from society that its okay for men to engage in immoral behavior in a relationship. "Bad boys" are even considered more desirable if they do so. Yet if a woman did the same she would labeled a bitch or a slut. You would think a real feminist would praise the "nice guy" for breaking the gender norms.

It's actually the opposite. It's because nice guys don't penetrate their insecurities, they don't challenge society's views. The bad guys tap into their Id and their repressed desires (repressed by society's conventions), that's why they always regret doing it with them yet they still crave them.

[Issalice]

This is so random lol. I can't even....just wow. The last paragraph


"Neckbeards aside–I’m not here to tell anyone not to wear a fedora. Style decisions are up to the person whose body is being adorned, and as someone who has struggled all my life with what I should and shouldn’t wear so I won’t look “fat” or “slutty” or any other stupid ass label that keeps women from dressing how they want to, I’m not in the business of being the style police. I am, however, in the business of telling men that unless their fedora is accompanied by a three-piece suit, they’re likely to be judged as a brony-MRA-redditor and therefore not score. That’s just a fact."

So much hypocrisy I just can't lol "Don't label me fat, slutty etc but you are totally this or that because of that stupid hat"

[Deleted]

This too, seems very shallow and indicative of their personality.

Well not really, everyone has something that is an instant turnoff...if the majority finds a fedora a turnoff then so be it. But just marking anyone with a fedora as a self proclaimed nice guy is rather silly.

[Sky High]

You would think a real feminist would praise the "nice guy" for breaking the gender norms.

except as she pouted out, when it's used as a ruse. though I'm sure some feminist will call the classic gentlemen a construct of the patriarchy as well.

[Deleted]

If a woman complains to you how you look in a particular hat and wants you never to wear that hat again, just tell her she should never show her face without makeup, ever again.

I mean, you can always get rid of the hat. She on the other hand, well... She's stuck with that face.

[Arewn]

Quite a shame, they're fairly decent looking hats and now there's some stupid stigma around them.

[Deleted]

THAT is the difference that people need to understand. they are two COMPLETELY different hats. and yes I would only wear a fedora if I were in some really nice suit or for Indy cosplay.

OT, I agree with the author. there are a bunch of horny men that can't get over a woman not wanting a hot piece of their man meat. and some of them like to wear that stupid ass hat. people need to be calling out these "nice guys" on a daily business, cuz I'm willing to bet they are the same troggs that leave awful comments about women all over the internet.

That's assuming there are that much self proclaimed nice guys. I've never met one in my life. I'm only 22 though...maybe I've just been lucky?

[Sky High]

So much hypocrisy I just can't lol "Don't label me fat, slutty etc but you are totally this or that because of that stupid hat"

yea... can't help but put the foot in their mouth at some point.

- - - Updated - - -

That's assuming there are that much self proclaimed nice guys. I've never met one in my life. I'm only 22 though...maybe I've just been lucky?

well OKC is where a lot of these ideas come from. not going to say that it should be established. I don't think there is a culture around the fedora if thats what your asking.

[BLCalliente]

1) dressing like a "slut" doesn't mean you want sex, but wearing a certain hat makes you a "nice guy"? Solid logic, feminist.

2) Putting a guy in the "friend zone" is a conscious choice. You're saying the person is good enough to associate with and intimate to, but not good enough to date/fuck/whatever. I don't see anything wrong with the practice OR the label.

Edit: I'm going out and buying a fedora immediately because fuck her.