Disclosing that you have HIV.

[Darsithis]

Shouldn't hiv people only date other hiv people?. I mean not trolling but what future would a hiv person have with a non hiv person in the long run?. If the most beautiful woman on earth was hiv positive and wanted to date me, I wouldn't do it no matter what.

That's you. Many others don't feel the same way.

Is it misinformation (at just a way for people to be against gays) that a huge percentage of gays and/or HIV+ people are gay? Never really understood why people attributed gay with HIV...

It started in the gay community, which is why it was first the "gay disease". Now it's far more 50/50 than anything else.

[alturic]

1) Condoms can break

2) because of the bite, any blood transfers could transfer HIV

3) HIV can turn into AIDS and kill without regular treatment, and knowing you have HIV and still not telling your partners is considered malicious intent

4) HIV is a serious disease that needs lifelong treatment.

Darth would know more than me obviously, but I think brushing off these charges because its just HIV is fairly stupid.

I'm not trying to downplay HIV/AIDs in the slightest but do you think that if I gave someone my pneumonia they should be able to sue me? How about if they died from it, should I get charged pressed against me? How about MERs? I mean, sure HIV/AIDs required (if I'm not mistaken, at this point in time) lifetime medication usage but... it's just so odd to me that it's treated (criminally at least) with such extremes.

Should someone be able to sue me for giving it to them? Meh, people sue people over stupid shit all the time, so something like this sure... but to think that I should be jailed over it, somewhat extreme.

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That's you. Many others don't feel the same way.



It started in the gay community, which is why it was first the "gay disease". Now it's far more 50/50 than anything else.

You know, I don't want to get side-tracked, and I really can't be bothered to do the research myself, but I assume you have... where exactly did it "come from"? I don't mean literally like you said "it started in the gay community", as I surely don't think you mean "well, it started from two gays having sex" but...

[Crissi]

I'm not trying to download HIV/AIDs in the slightest but do you think that if I gave someone my pneumonia they should be able to sue me? How about if they died from it, should I get charged pressed against me? How about MERs? I mean, sure HIV/AIDs required (if I'm not mistaken, at this point in time) lifetime medication usage but... it's just so odd to me that it's treated (criminally at least) with such extremes.

Should someone be able to sue me for giving it to them? Meh, people sue people over stupid shit all the time, so something like this sure... but to think that I should be jailed over it, somewhat extreme.


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You know, I don't want to get side-tracked, and I really can't be bothered to do the research myself, but I assume you have... where exactly did it "come from"? I don't mean literally like you said "it started in the gay community", as I surely don't think you mean "well, it started from two gays having sex" but...

If you can control the spread of a disease (which is difficult with MERS and pnemonia which is why its not the same) but purposely dont do that, yes you should be prosecuted.

[Nyanmaru]

Is it misinformation (at just a way for people to be against gays) that a huge percentage of gays and/or HIV+ people are gay? Never really understood why people attributed gay with HIV...

The 70s were not known to be logical...

1.) Interesting how even though he used a condom he was still found guilty.

2.) Extremely interesting how they consider it "dangerous instrument".

3.) Attempted murder? lol...

4.) Crazy that they deem it "deadly weapons". Not to laugh but it'd be an interesting conversation in prison... "don't come near me, my dick is classified as a deadly weapon"!

That's america for you, in Germany the use of a condom negates the part where it is considered bodily harm. At least not until today. And it's even discussed that it can't be considered assault if the drugs lowered the HIV level below the usual detectable border.

It's kind of a grey area, no? I mean, unless >YOU< (being the one with the disease) are looking at it strictly as a friendship with ZERO intention of wanting it to be anything further, why exactly wait for more dates? It's almost as much of a douche move as stringing someone along.

How would I know if I want you as friend or lover before I even went out with you once? If you are likely to be sexy time material, you should be told about it before things get steamy though.

[alturic]

If you can control the spread of a disease (which is difficult with MERS and pnemonia which is why its not the same) but purposely dont do that, yes you should be prosecuted.

Gotta be honest, never understood claims like that. It's easy as hell to control the spread of diseases/germs/colds. Don't go out until you're over it? Wear a mask, equiv to a condom?

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The 70s were not known to be logical...



That's america for you, in Germany the use of a condom negates the part where it is considered bodily harm. At least not until today. And it's even discussed that it can't be considered assault if the drugs lowered the HIV level below the usual detectable border.



How would I know if I want you as friend or lover before I even went out with you once? If you are likely to be sexy time material, you should be told about it before things get steamy though.

I'll admit, I've been with the same girl since high-school and just got married, so while I've been with the same girl for 14 years I'm fairly certain that if I seen a girl that I found attractive enough to ask out on a date, it's not because I'm just looking for a friend... maybe I'm just extremely cheap or something, but I ain't just going to randomly ask a girl out on a date because I need friends. :P

[Crissi]

Gotta be honest, never understood claims like that. It's easy as hell to control the spread of diseases/germs/colds. Don't go out until you're over it? Wear a mask, equiv to a condom?

I think its a combination of HIV being MUCH easier to keep contained due to the nature of how it is transmitted (cause wearing a mask still isnt a guarantee), as well as the fact HIV is life long while pnemonia and MERS are not.

Its MUCH easier to control blood born transfer diseases than saliva based or bug based transfers.

[Hooked]

Is there like a home test kit for aids that people can test the other person before sex?. I would really hate to leave it up to someone elses conscience to tell me something so important.

[Nyanmaru]

I'll admit, I've been with the same girl since high-school and just got married, so while I've been with the same girl for 14 years I'm fairly certain that if I seen a girl that I found attractive enough to ask out on a date, it's not because I'm just looking for a friend... maybe I'm just extremely cheap or something, but I ain't just going to randomly ask a girl out on a date because I need friends. :P

If you had a green dick and people with green dicks would be shuned by society because the society is not educated enough to understand that a green dick doesn't hurt anyone unless it's used as a club. Well you would surely not tell someone you find visually appealing that you had a green dick.

You know, I don't want to get side-tracked, and I really can't be bothered to do the research myself, but I assume you have... where exactly did it "come from"? I don't mean literally like you said "it started in the gay community", as I surely don't think you mean "well, it started from two gays having sex" but...

It came from some apes, an ancient virus. How it exactly got to humans is unknown, there's multiple theories.
Why it started in the gay community may be attributed to a lot more freedom in choosing partners for short term engagements. And it also may have been around in the hetero community for just as long but people never bothered to get tested so the numbers are skewed.

[Aeluron Lightsong]

I'd like to know about this info especially if it gets romantic and sexual(Whenever that is). It's a dealbreaker for me. Doesn't mean I won't show sympathy, I will always show sympathy to HIV infected.

[Darsithis]

Shouldn't hiv people only date other hiv people?. I mean not trolling but what future would a hiv person have with a non hiv person in the long run?. If the most beautiful woman on earth was hiv positive and wanted to date me, I wouldn't do it no matter what.

Yes. http://www.cvs.com/shop/product-deta...t?skuId=896631

You know, I don't want to get side-tracked, and I really can't be bothered to do the research myself, but I assume you have... where exactly did it "come from"? I don't mean literally like you said "it started in the gay community", as I surely don't think you mean "well, it started from two gays having sex" but...

It came from chimpanzees and was first recorded in 1959. I'm just referring to the first people in the United States (and thus, the gaining world's attention) were gay men who were transmitting the virus back and forth through sex. It moved from us to the straight population when married men would sleep with men on the side, then return to their wives.

[Hooked]

[QUOTE=Darsithis;27168614]Yes. http://www.cvs.com/shop/product-deta...t?skuId=896631QUOTE]

That seems like a pretty decent product but if they caught the disease within 3 months it says the results may not show up. That means a lot of people could be running around with the disease not knowing they are even infected.

[Nyanmaru]

It came from chimpanzees and was first recorded in 1959. I'm just referring to the first people in the United States (and thus, the gaining world's attention) were gay men who were transmitting the virus back and forth through sex. It moved from us to the straight population when married men would sleep with men on the side, then return to their wives.

If men could impregnate other men there'd have been more condoms between gay men and thus a lot less HIV infections. The important part is that it didn't originate from gay men, the gay community sadly had the best conditions and thus became the first hotbed. Otherwise it would have taken a few more years longer to develop like it did anyway.

That seems like a pretty decent product but if they caught the disease within 3 months it says the results may not show up. That means a lot of people could be running around with the disease not knowing they are even infected.

The test may also possibly show negative if the testee is on HIV drugs and has a low virus count. (low virus count being the reason why it doesn't show results in the early months)

[Lenonis]

Is there like a home test kit for aids that people can test the other person before sex?. I would really hate to leave it up to someone elses conscience to tell me something so important.

That why you go get tested together if it matters that much.

In regards to the topic there are a few really important considerations.

First, not disclosing being HIV positive before having sexual intercourse is considered a crime in many states. Thus the legal answer is you MUST disclose your status before sexytimes. From a moral perspective, you should disclose your status early -- how early is probably up to the people involved...but generally as stated a few dates.

Second, HIV is much harder to transmit than people think. The virus is fragile which is why you can't get it from toilet seats, pools, kissing, or even oral sex (disclaimer -- assuming no unusual sores or cuts on both parties). A man catching HIV from a woman is very rare, condom or no. And people who are undetectable are often don't transmit the virus.

Third, it is estimated that around 5% of the population (nordic decent I believe is most common) are immune to the virus. Something about protein receptor blah blah blah.

Fourth, preventative treatments now exist to reduce transmission rates by something astounding like 95% or more. Google PReP for more info.

Lastly, even with all the above being said -- be safe. Wrap it up, get tested. Straight, gay, whatever. If you are sexually active it is worth getting tested every 3 months -- and often there are places you can get tested for free. The last thing you want is to find out you are HIV positive, have no idea how long you've been that way and have to call the last 5 years worth of partners to tell them....and live with the potential guilt of transmitting it.

[artemishunter1]

People need to take HIV seriously. Yes, we have medication to reduce the chances of being infected, or even if infected live a semi normal life. But this generation seem to go out of their way to increase the risk because we have no many medication.

[OzoAndIndi]

Do you think it is appropriate that one discloses that they have HIV BEFORE even going far in dating someone? I would think it would be pretty messed up to date someone and find out that they have HIV. If they disclose it early, then you could break things off before feelings begin to occur.

It is just the courteous thing to do, perhaps not on the first date, but definitely not wait much longer after that first date to disclose it.

What is your opinion?

Yes, I agree, there are some things that are important and need to be disclosed very early at the first signs that attraction or headed toward a relationship. HIV, other transmittable STDs, still dealing with a really bad breakup or event in which you are still dealing with the emotional scars and might impact where, how, or how soon a relationship evolves, emotional disorders that require you to take medication to control (not necessarily 'simple' things like depression, but perhaps more like anti-psychotics in a case where it would not be good if the person stopped taking them), odd fetishes maybe... even gaming habits? lol

Kinda scary the idea of being full disclosure on some stuff, but if the person is worth it and they think you are then it won't scare them off, even if it's something they have to take a moment to think it over on their own.

[Deleted]

Better to just be open with it. Yes the pool of potential partners grows smaller, but it'd be saving a lot of time wading through all the people who have an issue with it.

[breadisfunny]

Do you think it is appropriate that one discloses that they have HIV BEFORE even going far in dating someone? I would think it would be pretty messed up to date someone and find out that they have HIV. If they disclose it early, then you could break things off before feelings begin to occur.

It is just the courteous thing to do, perhaps not on the first date, but definitely not wait much longer after that first date to disclose it.

What is your opinion?

1. your a jerk for doing so. dismissing someone based on what diseases they have that they may not have control over is incredibly shallow and vain. you could be ignoring potential soul mates for all you know. 2. of course it's appropriate. that way you know what precautions to take based on said disease.

edit: i just saw who posted this thread......can't believe i fell for it.

[Hooked]

1. your a jerk for doing so. dismissing someone based on what diseases they have that they may not have control over is incredibly shallow and vain. you could be ignoring potential soul mates for all you know. 2. of course it's appropriate. that way you know what precautions to take based on said disease.

edit: i just saw who posted this thread......can't believe i fell for it.

How is he being a jerk to not want someone with hiv?.

[Deleted]

1. your a jerk for doing so. dismissing someone based on what diseases they have that they may not have control over is incredibly shallow and vain. you could be ignoring potential soul mates for all you know.

You dismiss people based on their looks, their body type, their voice and a dozen other "vain" reasons and all of these are completely acceptable.

Even as a healthcare professional I would not get involved with a person who has HIV. Not only would I jeopardize my own work it would severely limit interaction with that person, even with all the precautions taken.

There's nothing wrong with demanding to know if you are putting yourself or your future at a risk. "It's just good business".

[Jaylock]

1. your a jerk for doing so. dismissing someone based on what diseases they have that they may not have control over is incredibly shallow and vain. you could be ignoring potential soul mates for all you know. 2. of course it's appropriate. that way you know what precautions to take based on said disease.

edit: i just saw who posted this thread......can't believe i fell for it.

Potential soul mates?

Give me a break. If someone does not disclose that they have HIV they are really not a soul mate, but rather almost a certified rapist, because thats basically what they are doing, raping someone of a normal and clean life.

Usually you want to find your "soul mate" with someone who also has HIV if you already have it.