One-on-one conversations - what do you talk about?

[Deleted]

To people who aren't me this is probably a stupid thing to ask, but I have real trouble talking to people when it's just me and them; it doesn't matter whether it's my best friend, a complete stranger, or anything in between. The typical advice is "Listen to what they're saying and use that as fuel", which is good advice, but it doesn't always work when your brain can't quickly make a link between what they've said and what to say/ask about it, which is pretty much the case for me a lot of the time.

I was having lunch in a cafe last week and I saw a couple in there who were talking to each other for a good half an hour. I couldn't hear what they were saying (and it'd be weird to listen in anyway), but I found myself wondering what they could even be talking about for half an hour, that's a long time to talk to someone on their own, at least for me it is anyway. Anyone can say "These napkins are neatly folded", but as a conversational topic it doesn't quite cut the mustard. So what's the deal here, where do people find these interesting things to talk about?

[Deleted]

About my huge throbbing penis normally.

[Kazeijin]

This is a really broad question, but in any one-on-one situation you could talk about limitless things

Movies, music, people, events, hobbies. That list, while finite as it seems, creates an infinite number of conversations. I'll use movies for an example.

"Have you seen xxxxxx movie?"
"What kind of movies do you enjoy watching"
"I saw this movie where xxxxxxx happened and then yyyyyyy did zzzzzzzzzz"
"Who is your favorite actor/actress"
"I'm gonna go see xxxxxxxx movie, you want to come with?"

The list goes on, but I can't just sit here and type every potential conversation. Topics aside, it all comes down to being comfortable with the person you're talking to. If you know this person in and out, the conversation will have a different tone than someone you're just meeting and getting a feel for their personality.

[Deleted]

Dunno, I never talk to anyone irl.

[Buxton McGraff]

About my huge throbbing penis normally.

This is off to a good start.

[Deleted]

I usually hit off convos with buddies by walking up to them and saying they look like shit, and then just hit it off from there.

[Kurioxan]

In all honesty im not quite sure how to answer that OP, its mostly organic, if you are interested in the person and their interests, conversation just pops up, add stuff of your own or creatre your own topic.
If just shy... most friends wont care, company and input time to time is more than enough to most people, no need to be a talking machine.

[Jester Joe]

I usually hit off convos with buddies by walking up to them and saying they look like shit, and then just hit it off from there.

I've greeted a friend that I haven't seen in a while by telling him he still looks fat.

That being said, he isn't really fat, but that's what he gets for trying to put the moves on my ex.

But usually I do just listen and add off of whatever they're talking about. Unless it's a close friend, then I'll talk about stuff I know interests them.

[Dezerte]

Start simple and expand from there, e.g. "what did you do yesterday?" can lead to all kinds of discussion.

[Deleted]

I think 90% of my daily conversations are business related and the topic is as aspected something business related :P

The other 10% is what's left of my social life haha.

[belfpala]

The news, people we know, movies, music, random trivia questions, work, what it would be like if Lamarckian Evolution was how things worked. You know, whatever comes to mind. If you're talking to the right person it's just natural.

[Drakoes]

Anything that comes into mind, depending on how close you are with that person imo. It can range from work, to the news, movies, upcoming events (both recent and near future ones) and even family if I know that person and their relatives very well.

I like to keep it natural. Some people just tend to be more outgoing and 'chatty' than others - don't be too much in their face about everything though.

[belfpala]

I wanted to add, maybe they were talking about the person at the other table watching them for a half hour. :P

[Deleted]

The only time I end a conversation asap is when someone starts talking about sports.

Some people ONLY seem to be able to talk about sports...

[Drakoes]

The only time I end a conversation asap is when someone starts talking about sports.

Some people ONLY seem to be able to talk about sports...

I don't know about you, but sports seem to be one of those topics that will either make or break a conversation. I like sports myself and even talk about working out at times, but I still prefer to talk about other things more.

[Blueobelisk]

The only time I end a conversation asap is when someone starts talking about sports.

But I'm the most knowledgable guy about basketball on this forum. What else are we supposed to talk about? The fucking weather?

[belfpala]

The only time I end a conversation asap is when someone starts talking about sports.

Some people ONLY seem to be able to talk about sports...

I'm more balanced in that regard. I like sports, but I don't like talking to people who only talk about sports. If I sense a person is just using it as a conversation starter, all good.

[Stonecloak]

Maybe OP your thinking too much about it and that's what is impairing you. Odds are you already know what to do you just wan't to do it so right you strip over your own leg. There's no right answer or way to speak to everyone.

[belfpala]

Maybe OP your thinking too much about it and that's what is impairing you. Odds are you already know what to do you just wan't to do it so right you strip over your own leg. There's no right answer or way to speak to everyone.

Also this.

And remember that just listening to someone is alright. Required, even; no one likes the dude who just talks without giving other people room to contribute.

[Kacey]

Guys are easy to talk to. 90% of the time they just want to have sex with me, so I use that to my advantage when speaking to them.