Adulterers are doing a Public Service.

[Aori]

Ya... I don't think so.

[Incredibale]

Adultery is serious business, not the cute little romp people make it out to be

Destroys families, makes children's youth a living hell, drives divorce which itself is another societal wrecker.

[imabanana]

If you have a problem with your spouse, it being sexual or romantically.. you talk about it. If you feel unsatisfied, you try different things. With your spouse.
And if you do make that misstep. You fucking tell her/him first chance you get.

Ugh, some people don't even deserve to have someone that loves them..

Depends on the couple. I've had a relationship where one of the first thing I was told about that sexual part was: "If you feel unsatisfied, you try different things. With someone else. (and don't tell me)".

[PizzaSHARK]

That act of cheating is lying to your partner, unless both are okay with it, which wouldn't make it cheating anymore.

No! I can't know about it! It has to be real!

But don't actually cheat on me!

[Evolixe]

Depends on the couple. I've had a relationship where one of the first thing I was told about that sexual part was: "If you feel unsatisfied, you try different things. With someone else. (and don't tell me)".

That just makes you strange, but I won't argue your ways.

[Volibear]

What are they, like U.S census workers that register the hoes? A Hoe registry?

You need access to that registry to find the easy booty

[imabanana]

That just makes you strange, but I won't argue your ways.

It makes me strange that someone told me that?

You're strange.

[kyoloco]

If you Cheat on your partner, you are a piece of shit. There is literally ZERO reasons to do it. Zero, zilch, none.

someone got cheated on

[Celista]

This thread got me thinking about an acquaintance of mine. 40, unmarried, hasn't been in a long-term serious relationship in about a decade, has cheated or "almost" cheated in every single one of his relationships. That being said, he's also relatively charming (in a nerdy, socially awkward scientist sort of way), attractive, and well educated.

He also has a hard time dating...this could be because he prefers dating women my age (25-30 range), but also because of his dating history. He met a girl recently and seemed to be really into her...then, when I asked him what was going on with said girl a few weeks ago, he gave some sort of excuse about "bad timing" before they even got to home base, so to speak. He says he's a little fucked up, which may be true, I suppose.

I don't know if adulterers really perform a public service, so to speak, but I get the impression that this guy's actions might have had other (unintended) consequences. But it's really hard to tell from an outsider's perspective.

Shrug.

[Mormolyce]

You might even say they're national heroes!

http://www.yourtango.com/experts/dav...-your-marriage

Quire a collection of articles that claim this. Some even go as far to claim to adulterers (people who enter affairs with married individuals) are a public servants. From what I can see, they claim that it helps the marriage because it satisfies desires, physically and emotionally, that isn't being done in the home.

At a glance, I say that makes sense as long as they don;t get caught. You can probably love someone all the while not being satisfied to some degree and going elsewhere.

I think these kinds of articles vastly overstate the case in order to create a sensational headline that will sell papers/farm clicks.

Cheating on a partner might bring a nonfunctional relationship to a close, or prompt the swift repair of a broken relationship. But it's nowhere near as effective as being honest and ending or repairing the relationship in the first place...

- - - Updated - - -

Secondly, Adultery is a crime in many places, including multiple states in the US

Many states in the US retain laws against adultery (and fornication) on their books, but as far as I know nobody has been prosecuted for those "crimes" for decades. Prevailing legal opinion is that those laws are unconstitutional following Lawrence v. Texas (which invalidated sodomy laws) but I don't think it's ever been tested because simply put nobody gets charged with it anymore. These are effectively dead laws.

Adultery is not a crime in any European country. Nor in most Communist countries. Nor most of Latin America. Nor Australia.

I don't think it's too much of a stretch to say that for most English speaking countries, laws against adultery are considered the kind of antiquated thing you only find in Africa, the Middle East and parts of Asia.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Adultery#Adultery_and_the_law

[THE Bigzoman]

This thread got me thinking about an acquaintance of mine. 40, unmarried, hasn't been in a long-term serious relationship in about a decade, has cheated or "almost" cheated in every single one of his relationships. That being said, he's also relatively charming (in a nerdy, socially awkward scientist sort of way), attractive, and well educated.

He also has a hard time dating...this could be because he prefers dating women my age (25-30 range), but also because of his dating history. He met a girl recently and seemed to be really into her...then, when I asked him what was going on with said girl a few weeks ago, he gave some sort of excuse about "bad timing" before they even got to home base, so to speak. He says he's a little fucked up, which may be true, I suppose.

I don't know if adulterers really perform a public service, so to speak, but I get the impression that this guy's actions might have had other (unintended) consequences. But it's really hard to tell from an outsider's perspective.

Shrug.

I don't actually think that. Look further in the thread. It makes sense, but in a funny way due to the fact that someone rationalizes it so well. It's an art really.

[Deleted]

Burglars do a public service because they show how bad people's security is.
Murderers solve overpopulation and unemployment.

Can you please change this? I'm absolutely against agreeing with you on anything, it's revolting to me.

[Celista]

I don't actually think that. Look further in the thread. It makes sense, but in a funny way due to the fact that someone rationalizes it so well. It's an art really.

People are quite good at rationalizing things I truly believe some people are incapable of monogamy. I don't think there's necessarily anything wrong with that, if people are honest with others with what they are and what they're about. Expecting/asking for monogamy from others, and knowing you're not able to hold up your end of the bargain is an incongruous approach to relationships.

[AeneasBK]

Can you please change this? I'm absolutely against agreeing with you on anything, it's revolting to me.

I'm pretty sure Germany will have come up with a single word to express the complex emotion of "Agreeing with somebody and imediately reassesing your position due to how little you want to agree with the person".

They're like that

[Kurioxan]

It makes a sort of sense but people taking it out of its context.
Cheating isnt good, but if a relationship is reaching a point of neglect that it causes one of the people to cheat, then yes it will be a wakeup call.

Cheating mostly happens when people arent happy, but still love the person enough to not want to leave or are afraid to hurt them, but have needs that arent being met at home.
Sadly this is normal in most relationships, modern life has very long hours of work, tons of stress and menial unsatisfying life for most, people get tired and forget the most basic thing on any relationship, to actually be in a relationship. To keep courting and dating the person, it doesnt end when she/he says "yes", its just doesnt end. The entire "taking for granted" kind of thing.

Its a shitty situation for sure, but cant honestly ask someone to dedicate themselves 100% to another person whom hardly bothers with them in the first place.

[breadisfunny]

i don't tolerate cheating in a relationship. simple as that. for any reason.

[zenkai]

http://www.yourtango.com/experts/dav...-your-marriage

Quire a collection of articles that claim this. Some even go as far to claim to adulterers (people who enter affairs with married individuals) are a public servants. From what I can see, they claim that it helps the marriage because it satisfies desires, physically and emotionally, that isn't being done in the home.

At a glance, I say that makes sense as long as they don;t get caught. You can probably love someone all the while not being satisfied to some degree and going elsewhere.

Are you joking me? Not only is it a huge violation of trust, it's dangerous? What if your spouse gets HIV or some other STD and pass it on to you?