is physical disability dealbreaker in relationship?

[Dispraise]

there are people who are into people with missing limbs...

Or, at least, they would like to be.

[breadisfunny]

Or, at least, they would like to be.

what is that supposed to mean?

[Dispraise]

what is that supposed to mean?

nudge nudge, know what I mean, say no more?

[Felicia]

I don't qualify as disabled. But do have a chronic illness (Type I Diabetes) that does require me to sometimes need aid. My husband has trained himself to wake up to the slightest odd noise in my sleep, because most of the time my blood sugar is low. I require glucagon in these situations, and can't give the shot by myself. Don't know how many times he's probably saved my life. Low blood sugar is nothing to joke about... I've woken up with no memory of acting out... sometimes will have a minor seizure and muscle spasms. I found out later on that I was super sensitive to my long acting insulin at the time (NPH), and the short acting insulin peaked made me go low. Modifying my ratios helped A LOT.

When he's deployed, he spends a lot of his time sending me text messages in the middle of the night to wake me up just in case. Pain in the ass, but I'm grateful for it. I have no family where we're at, so managing my diabetes without an extra eye can be a pain.

And the few times I've had REALLY BAD lows. I've woken up in places that I shouldn't be. When I was a teenager... woke up once in the middle of our backyard... up against the fence. My German Shepherds were coiled around me like armor, and the goats were behind me bleating up a storm. That was the weirdest one lol Haven't been that bad since.

Luckily I haven't had a low like that in nearly 6 years.

[Flutterguy]

Depends. If I was with someone that wasn't disabled and became disabled, I'd stay with them for sure. As far as someone that is already disabled, it'd depend on whether I connect with them or not.

[Revi]

It would be, yeah. I like doing active outdoorsy stuff, and I feel it would make me compromise too much.

That said, it would be different if I was with someone and they then got a physical disability. I wouldn't leave someone over it, I just wouldn't pursue them.

[Hooked]

It depends on what her body looks like. Could be a plus.

[Independent voter]

Yeah, I don't date people with disabilities. I might not mind a blind person say, but a paraplegic, I don't know, seems like you're taking on an unnecessary burden.

Now if I were married to someone and they got into a car crash and became a paraplegic, I wouldn't mind. But taking that on from the get go when you don't need too? I don't know.

[Deleted]

Probably not. When I look at the undatables I just feel sad for them. Though there was one girl in a wheelchair that took care of herself and was quite pretty.

[Lava Bucket]

[snip]
Luckily I haven't had a low like that in nearly 6 years.

Hey Felicia, have you considered getting an automatic insulin pump?

OT, I have a pretty open mind when it comes to physical disabilities. One thing I've learned as you get older, the physical matters less and less. The things that endure are common interests, alignment on key philosophies, and whether you can respect the other's opinion when you don't agree.

[Ripster42]

Hey Felicia, have you considered getting an automatic insulin pump?
.

Pumps can't auto-administer in the US (no FDA approval). And I've only heard about one that was tested in Australia. Many people with diabetes also don't like feeling they've got something hanging off of them.

Frankly, I'm not even sure the pumps that can continuously monitor your blood sugar are allowed in the US yet, as it's been a couple years since I've volunteered at the diabetes camp I used to volunteer at, so I don't keep up as much anymore.

OT: depends. I don't think I could with physical deformities (aside from a truncated limb from an accident or something) or wheelchair bound. At least, going into the relationship.

[GennGreymane]

depends, if I was already with the person for sometime I wouldnt leave them because of it, also if it was something like a lost limb or something its also pointless to leave them over it

however if its before dating and its more severe, it would be difficult.

[Deleted]

I'd have no problems dating a girl who was disabled but it would depend on the disablility. paralysed waist down, no problem. Neck down is much harder. Deaf, no problem, but blind would be much harder. The main thing is being able to talk and interact with each other. Wheelchair doesn't phase me.

[smokii]

i think it comes down to the severity of the disability and the quality of life potential.

i honestly feel terribly sorry for some disabled people as you can just see they've got a really shitty quality of life, yet their forced to continue on living even though nobody will ever want to be intimate with them, they can get terribly depressed and in some cases i feel like euthanisia should be an option for them.

others though, loss of a limb, MS, paralysis and other disabilities can still afford a decent quality of life.

it all depends on the level of support you can/are willing to provide as well as the potential quality of life they could achieve. someone utterly devoted to a disabled child for example, could give them a massive boost in their quality of life, but then that child could grow up requiring a partner to also provide that high level of maintenance in order to sustain the QoL the had previously. if they end up single and relying on a carer, their QoL could easily spiral downwards.

disability is a really touchy subject and i hope i've not offended anyone, but it's not like you can draw a line and say above this, you'll be ok, below it, this is sparta.

[Deleted]

of course it is, I'd never date a woman in a wheelchair or any other serious disability for that matter

[ComputerNerd]

I have eyesight problems, minor knee issues and some form of epilepsy.
I am perhaps more understanding for that reason.

[Googolplex]

As long as her intellect was intact, and she still had the ability to have a sexual relationship, I wouldn't care much. Blind, deaf, missing limps etc. would certainly not be a dealbreaker to me.

[Dug]

I wouldn't say its a deal breaker but I don't think I could deal with the stress of taking care of someone with a very serious disability like quadriplegics and so forth. Really shitty on my part but I know myself enough that I could never devote my life to such a task. I admire people that stick with disabled partners though. That's true love

[Uwibami]

As long as they don't need someone around all the time, then it doesn't matter to me.

[Deleted]

i wonder if people feel if physical disability is a dealbreaker in relationships? if someone was in wheel chair i dont think i could be in relationship with them its very restricting

In principle no.

In practice, probably, because pretty much most of my hobbies etc are very active. The only people I really meet outside work are people who share similar hobbies.