Why are so few people designing their own life?

[Emageht Tsoluoy]

I designed my own life, made plans for where i was headed and how to get there.

Then a meteor full of shit hit those plans, and kept raining down on all subsequent plans i made, until i stopped making plans because:depression.

[Ayla]

How old are you op?

Not a single one of my 'long term' goals has ever been reached. Its less depressing to make no goals and go where the wind takes me than fail to reach my goals.

A prime example is this. Years ago I was given a raise at work. A 25 cent raise. But, minimum wage went up the week after. This put me back at minimum wage when I was already 50 cents above minimum before. So after that, I stopped caring.

Im 30, I dont own a home, my car is falling apart. I dont have enough care to set goals other than try my hardest not to throw myself off a fucking bridge.

Im going back to school, going to try my best but I do worry I will fail.

[Shiny212]

Who says I don't have problems? I had to fail 99 times before I reached anything substantial.
That's also part of the winners mentality: you learn from mistakes and keep setting new goals accordingly.

I am already seeing so many excuses not to get anywhere in life coming in this thread and sadly expecting to see a whole lot more



So you failed at something and then... you stop? Well, ofcourse you will never get anywhere then, will you?

Wow, for someone who's supposedly set so many goals for himself and reached "every single one" how come you're still so narcissistic? Bad quality that makes people not like you;o

[Ghul]

scared of succeeding i guess

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Wow, for someone who's supposedly set so many goals for himself and reached "every single one" how come you're still so narcissistic? Bad quality that makes people not like you;o

its not important that everyone likes you, its more important that you like yourself, because we are our harshest critics 8>

[Wulfstan]

Life has a way of thwarting peoples aspirations.

[Shiny212]

scared of succeeding i guess

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its not important that everyone likes you, its more important that you like yourself, because we are our harshest critics 8>

Didn't say that everyone has to like you, that's impossible, but you do have to make sure someone likes you. If you treat everyone around you, such as your family like garbage by being all smug and superior, they're gonna think you're a dick.

[Ayla]

scared of succeeding i guess

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its not important that everyone likes you, its more important that you like yourself, because we are our harshest critics 8>

And when you dont get hired/promoted because someone doesnt like you?

[Ryme]

Are you asking why people choose the path of least resistance?

[imabanana]

I'm a mix of both. I never write goals or things like that, never had any impact on myself. Most of the time I just don't care about basically everything. Then I'll set one big one, but never anything detailed, always leave tons of room for unexpected events. Last one was "spend a year or so on the road to get somewhere on the other side of the planet, then find work there". Now that's done, am back in the "follow wherever this goes" until I disagree with the direction it takes or decides that some change is needed

[Ghul]

I like to be surprised by life.

Constant planning makes stuff predictable and boring, I've planned a citytrip this weekend, I've booked a hotel and got traintickets, I don't know what we're going to do over there, I could've planned the whole thing and made an agenda of some sorts, but thats for boring people.

I just need a general direction and I'll improvise en route.

i think you're overestimating plans, because plans mostly never go as you imagined them and in the end that will keep things interesting, because you have to improvise in order to reach your set goals.
on the other hand, if you dont have a set goal, you will just "go with it" wich in turn can be seen as "boring" too.

[Deleted]

scared of succeeding i guess

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its not important that everyone likes you, its more important that you like yourself, because we are our harshest critics 8>

Lies, people judge themselves on their intentions, other people will judge them on their deeds.

[Averrix]

I'm more happy being around people who are happy with who and where they are in life than people who are constantly failing at goals they set for themselves. They are always complaining and unhappy that they can't get where they want to go. And who wants to live like that? So I may never be the president of a company or own a Ferrari, but I am going back to school to at least try and get better than what I'm doing now. I'll at least be happy with the ride I took in this life.

[Twinkelle]

I stopped caring a long while ago. I used to plan, but now I'm not sure anything will make me happy again. Getting old is a blast.

[Deleted]

I find it depressing that some people don't care about their life.
But if their choose not to care that's their good "right" ofcourse.

No, i don't expect everyone to be like me or like other people that are driven. but I do wonder why so many people don't even set smallest goals for themsleves.

CBA guy checking in. The only thing I care about is being happy, the rest is just useless crap that stands in my way to happiness. Most people goals are work/career/money related. "I must have such and such thing by the time I turn 30" "OMG I need to buy THAT car and I'm going to do everything to achieve that!" "I want to be a [insert profession here] and do that all my life!" They are setting goals for the future, totally missing out on the present. They are putting so much stress on themselves because they feel the need to do such thing or achieve that goal, otherwise they'll be a failure in their eyes. The more goals in your life, the more options for you to suck. I don't have goals, I don't plan, I don't care. I have a decent job and a decent house, that's all I need to be happy. What are your goals? What do you write down every night?

[Acidbaron]

Had a plan got an incurable illness, stopped planning over multiple years to avoid nasty surprises.
You can plan all you want at one point you might be unfortunate enough for life to simply say "Nope!".

From my experience the only plan worth having in life is your back-up plan. Something to fall back on.

[OreoLover]

Who says I don't have problems? I had to fail 99 times before I reached anything substantial.
That's also part of the winners mentality: you learn from mistakes and keep setting new goals accordingly.

I am already seeing so many excuses not to get anywhere in life coming in this thread and sadly expecting to see a whole lot more



So you failed at something and then... you stop? Well, ofcourse you will never get anywhere then, will you?

You basically asked for excused, and proclaimed yourself a winner, go-getter, self-motivator, goal-reacher...

This is just self-promotion. Thankfully, another ignore to add.

[Wildtree]

How old are you op?

Not a single one of my 'long term' goals has ever been reached. Its less depressing to make no goals and go where the wind takes me than fail to reach my goals.

I myself too have long stopped to make long term goals.
That puts you in a danger of failure, where there doesn't need to be one.
I'm going with 5 - 10 year time frames instead, and re-evaluate when needed.
How am I suppose to fucking know with 20 what I want with 50?
Unless I am a half brain dead idiot with no vision and fantasy, I can't know it.
When I was 20, I dreamed that I'm gonna pile up a bunch of money to pay for the greatest funeral my friends and family ever experienced. Had it all mapped out, down to the menu served after wards.
Nowadays? Fuck that shit.
I don't give a damn. Might as well just let the govt cremate me, and not spend a dime on that nonsense. Money can be put to much better use.

[Ghul]

Lies, people judge themselves on their intentions, other people will judge them on their deeds.

they judge based on their deeds, yes but said judgement varies from person to person... if you try to be liked by everyone you're just going to tear yourself apart.
its not worth it...

oh and.., smileyfaces at the end of a statement.. really? are you trying to look goofy or something?

[Wildtree]

Lies, people judge themselves on their intentions, other people will judge them on their deeds.

philosophical explanation. Sounds good and is pretty on point.

[Kuntantee]

Why do you give a fuck? The question is not interesting, nor the answer.