weirdo neighbor issue - solutions appreciated

[sadface]

Ok so i live in ground floor flat like maisonette, there is 5 ground floor flats in a row (i'm the 3rd flat) we all share a communal garden excluding the last flat which is separated by a hedge. i have lived here for 2 years on and off but recently spent alot of time here. i like to have my back door open especially as it's sunny weather and sit outside sometimes. i don't know or haven't seen much of the 2 neighbors on my left but i know my neighbor on the right we have exchanged pleasantries (well me and his gf, not the guy, he just grunts). she has a dog lol at first when i saw the dog i played with him and stuff and when i was drunk sometimes i had my door open the dog would come in and i would laugh say stuff like "what you doing in here you little rascal" and all that stuff then she would shout him and take him in. But lately HAHA i cannot open my dam door the dog is just there smiling at me bursting to get in lol. so over 10 times of saying to neighbor "i cannot open my door mate your dogs there".. the grunt came to my backdoor and get this he said "look i don't care if you cannot open your door keep it shut so he wont come in and i'm not putting him on a lead or locking him in, so deal with it" and walked off haha.. i was inches away from biteing his nose off but i didn't. Now they dont shout the dog no more and they dont do anything lol. i wont hurt the dog as i love dogs and its not dogs fault but i just wanna walk in his flat and shit on his tv or throw stuff around or SOMETHING lol... my nephew told me not to .. what should i do guys? should i video them saying no? should i just deal with it and tell the council? what i do?

[Feral Camel]

I'm a little lost, but why don't you just keep your door shut when your not at home?

[sadface]

I'm a little lost, but why don't you just keep your door shut when your not at home?

no lol if my door was open when i wasnt there i would get robbed wouldnt i lol?

the issue is when im in my flat and my doors open

[glo]

Ok so i live in ground floor flat like maisonette, there is 5 ground floor flats in a row (i'm the 3rd flat) we all share a communal garden excluding the last flat which is separated by a hedge. i have lived here for 2 years on and off but recently spent alot of time here. i like to have my back door open especially as it's sunny weather and sit outside sometimes. i don't know or haven't seen much of the 2 neighbors on my left but i know my neighbor on the right we have exchanged pleasantries (well me and his gf, not the guy, he just grunts). she has a dog lol at first when i saw the dog i played with him and stuff and when i was drunk sometimes i had my door open the dog would come in and i would laugh say stuff like "what you doing in here you little rascal" and all that stuff then she would shout him and take him in. But lately HAHA i cannot open my dam door the dog is just there smiling at me bursting to get in lol. so over 10 times of saying to neighbor "i cannot open my door mate your dogs there".. the grunt came to my backdoor and get this he said "look i don't care if you cannot open your door keep it shut so he wont come in and i'm not putting him on a lead or locking him in, so deal with it" and walked off haha.. i was inches away from biteing his nose off but i didn't. Now they dont shout the dog no more and they dont do anything lol. i wont hurt the dog as i love dogs and its not dogs fault but i just wanna walk in his flat and shit on his tv or throw stuff around or SOMETHING lol... my nephew told me not to .. what should i do guys? should i video them saying no? should i just deal with it and tell the council? what i do?

What in the shit am I reading? Entertaining the idea of hurting a dog, but not doing so because "you love dogs" is slightly jarring, wanting to defecate on someone's TV is just plain weird and the random use of all the LOLs and HAHAs is just bizarre.

[sadface]

What in the shit am I reading? Entertaining the idea of hurting a dog, but not doing so because "you love dogs" is slightly jarring, wanting to defecate on someone's TV is just plain weird and the random use of all the LOLs and HAHAs is just bizarre.

The "haha" and "lol" things are like DUN DUN DUN you know? like in a movie when something bad is about to happen it goes DUN DUN DUN..you might be trolling me i don't know.

i will clarify

She has a dog - the story is about a dog -DUN DUN DUN
I cannot open my door - im trapped -DUN DUN DUN
He told me to deal with and walked off - i'm trying to hold all my anger in!!- DUN DUN DUN
I told them the issue but they don't do anything - the problem still exists - DUN DUN DUN

understand?

well the thought arose in my mind to spray dog with water or pick dog up and throw it on his couch in his house..but i like dogs and it's not the dogs fault his owner is a retard.

If your neighbor came to your house and told you to stay in your house and not open your door would you want to shit on his TV? if not then don't reply to this thread you're no good here..

[Huehuecoyotl]

The "haha" and "lol" things are like DUN DUN DUN you know? like in a movie when something bad is about to happen it goes DUN DUN DUN..you might be trolling me i don't know.

i will clarify

She has a dog - the story is about a dog -DUN DUN DUN
I cannot open my door - im trapped -DUN DUN DUN
He told me to deal with and walked off - i'm trying to hold all my anger in!!- DUN DUN DUN
I told them the issue but they don't do anything - the problem still exists - DUN DUN DUN

understand?

well the thought arose in my mind to spray dog with water or pick dog up and throw it on his couch in his house..but i like dogs and it's not the dogs fault his owner is a retard.

If your neighbor came to your house and told you to stay in your house and not open your door would you want to shit on his TV? if not then don't reply to this thread you're no good here..

You are quite correct, this is a story about a problem neighbour. However, you appear to have gone through the entire story without realising that the problem neighbour is actually you.

Are you Bruce Willis?

Seriously, the only thing I get out of this is that you may be a borderline sociopath with major anger issues. The only thing that needs to change in this is that you calm the fuck down. Open your door, and the next time the dog tries to come in just tell it clearly and plainly "no!". If necessary gently steer it back out of the house. And be thankful this is a dog you are dealing with, that can be trained, rather than a cat. You made the dog believe it was okay to come into your house, now you are planning to react violently if it does. Think before the next time you do something like this.

[jellmoo]

I honestly don't know what the solution to your issue is (but to be honest, if the dog is friendly it seems like the opposite of a problem to me), but I can absolutely promise you that no issue in the history of recorded time has been solved by shitting on a TV.

[sadface]

You are quite correct, this is a story about a problem neighbour. However, you appear to have gone through the entire story without realising that the problem neighbour is actually you.

Are you Bruce Willis?

Seriously, the only thing I get out of this is that you may be a borderline sociopath with major anger issues. The only thing that needs to change in this is that you calm the fuck down. Open your door, and the next time the dog tries to come in just tell it clearly and plainly "no!". If necessary gently steer it back out of the house. And be thankful this is a dog you are dealing with, that can be trained, rather than a cat. You made the dog believe it was okay to come into your house, now you are planning to react violently if it does. Think before the next time you do something like this.

Man, it's a communal garden so if i'm watching tv or eating food and the dog walks in with no lead and the owner has no plan of getting a lead for the dog i am supposed to get up and remove the dog and then sit down and then get up remove dog sit down get up remove dog ect ect? the dog keeps coming back the owner will not bring his dog in or put him on a lead. Do you understand man? So the neighbor is forcing me to shut my door when i don't want to? are you saying this neighbor does not have to put his dog on a leash or anything? please tell me i'm not insane

[sadface]

I honestly don't know what the solution to your issue is (but to be honest, if the dog is friendly it seems like the opposite of a problem to me), but I can absolutely promise you that no issue in the history of recorded time has been solved by shitting on a TV.

the dog keeps coming back into my home man 24 hours a day, the owner will not do anything. Please tell me i'm not insane

[Calzaeth]

Just put a wide board or something against the door when it is open, so the dog can't just walk in?

Or try talking to the gf, if she is the sensible one.

[Butler to Baby Sloths]

the dog keeps coming back into my home man 24 hours a day, the owner will not do anything. Please tell me i'm not insane

If the dog is friendly it should be fairly easy to train it to realise that you don't want it at your door.

[Sykol]

Just put a lead on the dog next time he comes into your house and claim he's yours. Get a doggy bed, a food bowl, and play fetch with him in your gigantic backyard.

[sadface]

Just put a wide board or something against the door when it is open, so the dog can't just walk in?

Or try talking to the gf, if she is the sensible one.

Yes i have a wide board but i threw it in the cuboard because my brain keeps telling me that WTF do i need a board on my own door for this ius not my dog.. please just put yourself in my shoes 24 hours a day understand ok

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If the dog is friendly it should be fairly easy to train it to realise that you don't want it at your door.

i should train and discipline my neighbors dog? it's not my dog

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Just put a lead on the dog next time he comes into your house and claim he's yours. Get a doggy bed, a food bowl, and play fetch with him in your gigantic backyard.

I don't want a dog man

[Butler to Baby Sloths]

i should train and discipline my neighbors dog? it's not my dog

It's your house you don't want it coming in to though. Also, you already trained it to think that you wanted it to come in...

she has a dog lol at first when i saw the dog i played with him and stuff and when i was drunk sometimes i had my door open the dog would come in and i would laugh say stuff like "what you doing in here you little rascal" and all that stuff

[Drungan]

I question everything about the OP ...... the name the avatar, the relentless use of lol and HAHAHA.....

However ill try to help, you claim that you like dogs, and that the dog is friendly, so having it on visit when you are at home and have the door open can not be that big of a problem.

if it is a problem start by doing a few things, like ignoring it when it is there, not feeding it.

Place a chair of something like that in front of the door so the dog can't just walk in but you still can have the door open.

Taking a dump on there tv is not the solution.

[Sykol]

Yes i have a wide board but i threw it in the cuboard because my brain keeps telling me that WTF do i need a board on my own door for this ius not my dog.. please just put yourself in my shoes 24 hours a day understand ok

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i should train and discipline my neighbors dog? it's not my dog

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I don't want a dog man

You made the dog think you do. Whether you see it or not, you've already conditioned and trained him to act as your companion. He probably values you more than his owners if he's that starved for attention. So you've either now got a dog that's not yours and need to fully commit to the bit, or start training him not to hang around your place all the time.

[Deleted]

Problem solved

always better then making a fuss with your neighbours, there still living next door and can give you a lot of hell for nothing

[starkey]

Ask your landlord to put in a screen door.

[Deleted]

Sounds like you got a free dog, you can't complain man... it's free.

[xpire]

Ok so i live in ground floor flat like maisonette, there is 5 ground floor flats in a row (i'm the 3rd flat) we all share a communal garden excluding the last flat which is separated by a hedge. i have lived here for 2 years on and off but recently spent alot of time here. i like to have my back door open especially as it's sunny weather and sit outside sometimes. i don't know or haven't seen much of the 2 neighbors on my left but i know my neighbor on the right we have exchanged pleasantries (well me and his gf, not the guy, he just grunts). she has a dog lol at first when i saw the dog i played with him and stuff and when i was drunk sometimes i had my door open the dog would come in and i would laugh say stuff like "what you doing in here you little rascal" and all that stuff then she would shout him and take him in. But lately HAHA i cannot open my dam door the dog is just there smiling at me bursting to get in lol. so over 10 times of saying to neighbor "i cannot open my door mate your dogs there".. the grunt came to my backdoor and get this he said "look i don't care if you cannot open your door keep it shut so he wont come in and i'm not putting him on a lead or locking him in, so deal with it" and walked off haha.. i was inches away from biteing his nose off but i didn't. Now they dont shout the dog no more and they dont do anything lol. i wont hurt the dog as i love dogs and its not dogs fault but i just wanna walk in his flat and shit on his tv or throw stuff around or SOMETHING lol... my nephew told me not to .. what should i do guys? should i video them saying no? should i just deal with it and tell the council? what i do?

You sound quite delusional, maybe you ought find solutions for that first... just saying.