Am I a horrible person for not feeling anything?

[Zeth Hawkins]

When I hear about these shootings in the US, innocents being bombed overseas, children in Africa starving, yada yada... I don't feel any emotion. I get that these things shouldn't happen. I'd be cool with people getting along and living good lives, but I'm not sad or angry that this stuff happens.

If something happens to an acquaintance, friend, or family member, then it might get me riled (never had anything happen to those I know), but I don't feel much empathy for those I've had no contact with. Even when there were stabbings recently-ish at my high school and college, I only really felt surprised. One shrug later, and I was over it.

Should I care more about people that have no consequence on my life? Why? Do you? What are your reactions to various goings-on in the world? I'm probably just a sociopath (or is it psychopath?). I have enough empathy to know not to be mean to people, in fact I've been told I'm too nice and don't say "no" enough.

I suppose this thread is asking, "Why is extended empathy needed? Do people naturally have such an emotional link to those they'll never meet, or are they trained to think this way because society says they should?" And am I conflating/confusing empathy with sympathy? I probably just lack both.

Note: I'm not trying to ask if empathy is a "social construct". Fucking sick of that phrase.

[Blueobelisk]

People who don't care if other people suffer, but make threads because they think not caring makes them special are called "selfish."

[THE Bigzoman]

Wanna know about a little secret?

The Majority of us don't care about tragedies as long as they don't happen to us or our loved ones.

[monkmastaeq]

I doubt the people who talk about it even care anyways, it's just another way for them to yap about something without having to do anything. Oh im such a good person I texted the red cross and gave them 5$ look how much i care.

I'm not sad or angry , i don't know those people , even if it happens in my country that means nothing borders and countries are meaningless just another way to set the people against each other so the rich can rule easier.

[Darkeon]

You just described most people. You are average and not that important. Just like all of us.

[TheMediator]

I don't know why people insist on assuming they're sociopaths.

Dexter made it cool.

@ OP: No I don't think you're a "horrible person". You're not obligated to feel bad for what happens to other people. You'll certainly be perceived as cold/detached for not mustering up any emotion about it (or at least feigning some sort of emotional response) but there's nothing "wrong" per-say not getting worked up about something that doesn't personally impact you and that you can't personally change.

Oh im such a good person I texted the red cross and gave them 5$ look how much i care.

...? Spreading "awareness" is one thing, but are you really criticizing donating to a charitable cause? That's pretty much the definition of being a good person - benefiting others at your expense.

[UnholySanctuary]

When I hear about these shootings in the US, innocents being bombed overseas, children in Africa starving, yada yada... I don't feel any emotion. I get that these things shouldn't happen. I'd be cool with people getting along and living good lives, but I'm not sad or angry that this stuff happens.

If something happens to an acquaintance, friend, or family member, then it might get me riled (never had anything happen to those I know), but I don't feel much empathy for those I've had no contact with. Even when there were stabbings recently-ish at my high school and college, I only really felt surprised. One shrug later, and I was over it.

Should I care more about people that have no consequence on my life? Why? Do you? What are your reactions to various goings-on in the world? I'm probably just a sociopath (or is it psychopath?). I have enough empathy to know not to be mean to people, in fact I've been told I'm too nice and don't say "no" enough.

I suppose this thread is asking, "Why is extended empathy needed? Do people naturally have such an emotional link to those they'll never meet, or are they trained to think this way because society says they should?" And am I conflating/confusing empathy with sympathy? I probably just lack both.

Note: I'm not trying to ask if empathy is a "social construct". Fucking sick of that phrase.

When you hear about it on an almost-daily basis, it's normal for you to be desensitized.

[Shadowferal]

When I hear about these shootings in the US, innocents being bombed overseas, children in Africa starving, yada yada... I don't feel any emotion. I get that these things shouldn't happen. I'd be cool with people getting along and living good lives, but I'm not sad or angry that this stuff happens.

When you have an emotional investment... a connection..involvement..that's when you should feel something.

- - - Updated - - -

When you hear about it on an almost-daily basis, it's normal for you to be desensitized.

No desensitivity to see here.

[sheggaro]

Nobody except the media really cares.

[Nihilist74]

How could you feel anything for people you don't know. Horrible things are happening to people all over the world right now. There isn't anything you can do about it or know the victims. Its pretty normal that you wouldn't feel anything about it. Even if you don't feel anything about people you know, you can still chose to be evil, good or in between. There are a lot of sociopaths out there who don't murder people or do bad things. They chose one way or another.

[Deleted]

Empathy differs from person to person.

You're not horrible for that. You're horrible if you let things happen to thoose you love, and choose not to act, however.

- - - Updated - - -

People who don't care if other people suffer, but make threads because they think not caring makes them special are called "selfish."

The person asked a genuine question ; or are you just being a dick?

- - - Updated - - -

I got a battle pet for it. I'm a great person.

Actions matter, not your thoughts. Even if you really are invested and "caring" about thoose in need, doing nothing for them - leaves you in the same position as someone who despises them and also does nothing.

They both do nothing. So, having done something, you contributed to the cause of bettering stuff. That does not nessecarily imply that you are good, either way.

[monkmastaeq]

...? Spreading "awareness" is one thing, but are you really criticizing donating to a charitable cause? That's pretty much the definition of being a good person - benefiting others at your expense.

less than a cup of coffee, its like throwing pocket change at a homeless person to shut them up and so you can feel mildly better about yourself. You're not doing it to help them. simple concept for feeble brain

[Irian]

You're not a sociopath, for god's sake stop being such an edgy mcedgelord.

Empathy is so malleable that there's no way to really quantify it. The way you feel is the way countless young adults (and some adults) feel in the face of large-scale tragedies, because often the bleeding heart for the death of strangers is developed by how much we have personally lost. I felt nothing and even shrugged off large-scale tragedies like nothing until someone I cared for died in one; now I can't see those numbers without realizing that 50 people dead is likely around 500+ people grieving like I was.

Empathy is a thing that is not only innately more powerful to some personality types but also varies depending on our life experiences. You may have a personality that makes you not care much for strangers.

[INVASMANIXOXOXO]

I think the opposite is actually true. I think people like you/me acknowledge that most people are all too desensitized to these types of occurrences, because we get bombarded with them (7 billion stupid people after all). I think its almost more noble/brave to admit you don't gaf anymore as opposed to "praying for Paris" or w/e. This is coming from somebody who participates in organized religion. In other words, even if somebody says "prayers with xxx" on facebook whenever one of these things happens there is a good a good chance they give less of a fuck than you.

Edit: As a follow up, I never really post any sort of social media stuff and I really only express my sorrow to people close to me ( I could see how people could see me as cold). One news story kind of changed me, I was watching a video about a terrorist attack in Turkey on CNN about 2 years ago. THE VIDEO ACTUALLY SHOWED A THE BOMB GOING OFF IN A CROWD OF LIKE 50 PEOPLE, I Had seen executions and stuff like that but this was different. No one in US/EU seemed to care much. Although I share your sentiment, I doubt you could watch the video I saw (20+ being blown to pieces) and not feel some compassion, its a little bit more when its not just words on a web page.

[Valech]

you are not a horrible person OP. You are just looking for attention. That´s common

[nyc81991]

I believe if given the opportunity to be able to make a change for the better in the world you should care and take the opportunity. However, unless you are wealthy and can contribute to making the world a better place you aren't "required" to do anything but be a decent human being (at least in public).

So essentially, we should care and make a difference where we can.

[pmkaboo]

nobody cares bro. people just fake sympathy either out of politeness, or just to fit in.

[sheggaro]

I got a battle pet for it. I'm a great person.

Haha.

I found the pet to be so ugly that I didn't bother.

What does that make me ? :/

[Fincayra]

I find myself in the same boat honestly. I shed more tears reading about the Voyager probes and their possiblity of finding alien life someday than I have over any shooting or massacre of humanity. We are bombarded by death. Every day we turn on the news to be greeted by whatever atrocity we have inflicted upon ourselves that day. No my friend, it's not sociopathy in the least to follow a course to its logical conclusion.

[Shakadam]

Most people are like this. It's just that you never hear about them because the few people with "extended empathy", who actually feel something when something happens to someone they've never heard of, take up all the space in media and blogs and whatnot, what little media space is left over is taken by hypocrites who pretend to care to get their own opinions validated.

Normal people care about themselves, and people they have some kind of connection to. Most simply shrug and turn to the next page when reading about some disaster on the other side of the world, because it doesn't concern us or anyone we know.