Having your Mom is the most precious thing in this world

[Deleted]

Does she pay for your beer or why the shift in your priorities?

She brings him tendies...

[zenkai]

Seriously, nothing compares to this. Cherish your Mom while she is still alive.

Not everyone has a good mother...

[Medusa Cascade]

I do enjoy our showers together

[Lady Dragonheart]

No. My mother and I are and have always been on very hostile terms. So, if she were to drop dead, I'd probably have a toast and a little celebration.

[GarlicGuy]

I am always envious of people who have this type of relationship/feelings about their moms.

Me too. I have not had a good relationship with mine for 10 years or more.... 3 years ago she was diagnosed with mild dementia, but now she is in a nursing home, and we can't even have a conversation that she can follow. Almost no matter what I say, she doesn't believe me. She thinks I stole all of her money, and tells me that almost every time I go to see her..... I know this is the dementia talking, but there is really no way to fix our relationship.

[Harry Botter]

Me too. I have not had a good relationship with mine for 10 years or more.... 3 years ago she was diagnosed with mild dementia, but now she is in a nursing home, and we can't even have a conversation that she can follow. Almost no matter what I say, she doesn't believe me. She thinks I stole all of her money, and tells me that almost every time I go to see her..... I know this is the dementia talking, but there is really no way to fix our relationship.

Yeah my mom is just pure human shit. She doesn't have a disease or anything to blame it on. She would regularly beat me with brooms or mops or anything she could get her hands on. She spent years trying to convince doctors I was retarded and had me on 8 different meds. Would regularly tease me, call me fat and stupid and would starve me and lock me in the apartment while she went out. Haven't talked to her in years and no idea if she is still living or not.

[Deleted]

My mother was a saint and a pillar of the family. May she rest in peace.

[Ryme]

Best person I know

[Celista]

Yeah my mom is just pure human shit. She doesn't have a disease or anything to blame it on. She would regularly beat me with brooms or mops or anything she could get her hands on. She spent years trying to convince doctors I was retarded and had me on 8 different meds. Would regularly tease me, call me fat and stupid and would starve me and lock me in the apartment while she went out. Haven't talked to her in years and no idea if she is still living or not.

That was exactly how my mom treated my brother, no hyperbole. I'm sorry. People don't understand when we talk about how horrible parents can be, but the truth is that there are a lot of horrible ones out there.

They also don't understand what would compel someone to not talk to his or her parent for years, but sometimes it is the healthiest thing you can do psychologically.

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It's nice to hear happy stories/comments about loving parents in this thread

[May90]

That was exactly how my mom treated my brother, no hyperbole. I'm sorry. People don't understand when we talk about how horrible parents can be, but the truth is that there are a lot of horrible ones out there.

They also don't understand what would compel someone to not talk to his or her parent for years, but sometimes it is the healthiest thing you can do psychologically.

It is interesting how some quite decent overall people can be absolutely godawful at parenting. Don't want to judge anyone, but my aunt, for example, screamed at her daughter quite a lot, for absolutely random reasons - even though otherwise she is one of the most friendly and intelligent people I've ever known. *shrugs* I've never quite understood this phenomenon of awesome people doing outright shitty things sometimes...

[Celista]

It is interesting how some quite decent overall people can be absolutely godawful at parenting. Don't want to judge anyone, but my aunt, for example, screamed at her daughter quite a lot, for absolutely random reasons - even though otherwise she is one of the most friendly and intelligent people I've ever known. *shrugs* I've never quite understood this phenomenon of awesome people doing outright shitty things sometimes...

Yes. My mom was active in charity organizations and would do nice things for the neighbors, she took care of a family friend while he was dying from prostate cancer and would routinely do nice things for an elderly neighbor.

People aren't fully good or bad. We like to think of them in such a way because it is easier for our brains to process; the truth is more nuanced. A child can be a scapegoat for a lot of horrific behavior.

We also don't like to think that the seemingly nice people we meet every day routinely do things like abuse children. But that is what happens, abuse and neglect of children are more common than what people realize.

Public personas are often a mask, it is one of the reasons why abuse of any type can go so long without notice.

[Drakpower]

Parents are interesting and can be very nuanced. I did not have a good relationship with my mother until she stopped doing the things she did and I stopped being an asshole to her. Now, she's one of my best friends and I couldn't be happier.

[Powerogue]

For her flaws she's probably the best person I know.

Cherish both your parents. If for no other reason, they changed your diapers for all those years.

[Palisis]

Indeed...I wish my mother and I were close now but unfortunately that is not the case...

We WERE close years ago...that is until I found out years ago that she lied to me about key aspects of my finances (I let her "handle"my money years ago). Yeah... she stole money from me when I was a child till I was an adult (22, blindly trusting her) and at the same time she partially destroyed my credit. Not to mention she is currently on a bible thumping campaign against my wife and I for leaving the church we used to go to with her. My wife and I decided to leave the church, become atheists and live a peaceful, open, logical and focused life. Apparently that might have been the nail on the coffin that is our relationship. Oh, not to mention that she has been spreading lies and rumors amongst the church and our former friends there (who we cut out because the church was essentially a religious cult that we were manipulated to stay in).

It's funny though...ever since I cut her off slowly over the past 3 years ago till today, and officially left the church my wife and I have been extremely successful in life. We both have a new house, new vehicles, amazing jobs (we are both engineers) amazing dogs and a wonderful life several states away from her. We are also nearly debt free aside from student loans and a mortgage. We are happy, learning about so much in lives and have been growing mentally and physically! Aside from that....

I highly doubt our relationship is salvageable at this point. I cherish the moments that were great when she and I were close and once saw "eye to eye". Now... she is just a religious nut job who is manipulative and won't stop sending me texts with scriptures, stating that "I am destroying my family without God!" blah, blah, blah, etc....I do keep in touch with random texts and such, however I only visit her once or twice a year ONLY out of respect that she IS my mother, despite the circumstances. It sucks but...it is what it is.

I kept reading your story going "ok, ok, thats normal... pretty average... where is this going?"

Yea, that's just pretty normal. lol right? I like to consider myself normal.