Are you guys happy with your life?

[shadowmouse]

Well, I was supposed to be dead at least seven years ago, so there's a decent start. Not only am I not dead yet, but the chronic pain has remained manageable and the OSA hasn't gotten particularly worse.

I'm still very enthusiastic about the upcoming wedding, and Fiancee 2.1 continues to pamper me. Since her business is health and beauty she has training in traditional Chinese medicine and a bit of Western medicine, so she has also been working on things like the OSA and chronic pain with some success.

I enjoy my work, and I'm starting to get to cut back my course load to the point that I can pick up more corporate training and consulting. It has been a pleasure to teach over the years, and I'm happy that students from seventeen years ago still keep up with me, but consulting and corporate training pay significantly more and I need to be a bit more serious about that now that I'm starting a family.

The quasi-adoptive 'daughters' (a holdover from the old days, a tradition that once would have been considered adoption but does not meet modern adoption standards) have all gone on to do well in their own lives. I'm proud of them and they always give me a reason to smile.

I enjoy where I am. It has been an interesting run, watching the changes here. Most of my time has been in the Northeast (Dongbei), so getting married to a Southern Chinese woman is going to be interesting. Particularly during Spring Festival, the Chinese tend to go back to wherever they consider the family's hometown. That means I'll start spending time away from the big city environment that I've grown used to, and going to a scenic region of Hunan (Dongting Lake/Dongtinghu).

Instead of this:


A dash of this:



Life could be worse, I'll count these as being happy.

[Stelio Kontos]

I'm alright with how things are, but not comfortable enough to not keep trying to improve.

I'm 35, unmarried, and saving up to buy my (hopefully first) house in the US.

I'd like to have been married by now, but the girl I was planning to marry after being together for 7 years left me via Facebook Messenger. Did some soul-searching after that. Still haven't dated another Asian girl since.

I'm not working in a field my degree applies to me. I left law school because the then-gf told me it would keep me too busy and we could start a family. She also kept me from going into the US military, and now I'm too old. So yeah, I let her ruin my career plans. Still kick myself over that.

So other than feeling like I'm starting over again career-wise in my 30s, and feeling like I'm too old to fix some of it, things aren't terribly bad.

[Deleted]

Yes, very happy actually! Things seem to keep getting better and better every year too.
I am kind of a self-development fan for years now and I have everything I enjoy today to thank to that.

This I think is also the key to a happy life: you have to make it so yourself.
Life doesn't get better unless you do, so get some goals and work towards them everyday (even if it's just a little bit)

[Airlick]

Could be worse, I guess. I'm not very happy currently, but hopeful for the future. I was stuck in a really dark hole a few years back, but it's gradually getting better. This and the next year may be the breaking point for me.

[Deleted]

Life's good. Got myself a fine women. Children in the making. House is built. Tree is planted. Job is well payed. Life's good.

[Freighter]

I Still haven't dated another Asian girl since.

Because...? Doesn't really make any sense to me to avoid dating someone because an ex who are part of the same racial group did something bad.

[Stelio Kontos]

Because...? Doesn't really make any sense to me to avoid dating someone because an ex who are part of the same racial group did something bad.

Cultural issues, mainly. I wouldn't have an issue with an Asian-American, or Asian-British or what have you.

But at least for Thais, I don't think Greek and Thai culture go very well, like oil and water.

Add to that a couple of bad shorter relationships with a Korean and a Japanese girl back in college (interspersed with others, of course), and I just sorta figure something about my personality or my upbringing just doesn't jive with some cultures.

[Devilyaki]

Meh, there is good, and there is bad.

[yetgdhfgh]

Damn Jayburner just get some Prozac or some shit or get laid!

As for your question no not really cause happiness is an illusion that my brain gives me so i make my own happiness by taking pain killers that bind to my mu opioid receptors that flood my brain in happiness juice.

[Deleted]

Cultural issues, mainly. I wouldn't have an issue with an Asian-American, or Asian-British or what have you.

But at least for Thais, I don't think Greek and Thai culture go very well, like oil and water.

Add to that a couple of bad shorter relationships with a Korean and a Japanese girl back in college (interspersed with others, of course), and I just sorta figure something about my personality or my upbringing just doesn't jive with some cultures.

what about other white people? someone that is from sweden too culturally different?

[Stelio Kontos]

what about other white people?

More of a mixed bag.

Some good, some very good, and some have been bad.

But for some reason, Asians have been the only one I've gone snake-eyes on. Thai, Japanese, Korean (well, Korean-American), Filipino, and Indonesian. To be fair, the Japanese girl turned out to be mentally ill.

[Daneman]

More of a mixed bag.

Some good, some very good, and some have been bad.

But for some reason, Asians have been the only one I've gone snake-eyes on. Thai, Japanese, Korean (well, Korean-American), Filipino, and Indonesian. To be fair, the Japanese girl turned out to be mentally ill.

What's wrong with them? I have a thai girlfriend and we're getting along just fine. Not as stupid as nordic girls in regards to feminism.

[Stelio Kontos]

What's wrong with them? I have a thai girlfriend and we're getting along just fine. Not as stupid as nordic girls in regards to feminism.

Long story, a lot of factors, I bet.

I've had other Thais tell me the region she's from has something of a bad reputation.

[Freighter]

What's wrong with them? I have a thai girlfriend and we're getting along just fine. Not as stupid as nordic girls in regards to feminism.

I am not even surprised. Why is it that so many white men who rail against non-whites coming to their countries often have asian girlfriends?

[Stelio Kontos]

I am not even surprised. Why is it that so many white men who rail against non-whites coming to their countries often have asian girlfriends?

I've noticed the same. Half the time I wouldn't say my ex-gf was Thai. We met at school, but a lot of these guys meet Thai/Pinay women online and have them fedexed over.

[shadowmouse]

Doesn't really make any sense to me to avoid dating someone because an ex who are part of the same racial group did something bad.

Cultural issues, mainly. I wouldn't have an issue with an Asian-American, or Asian-British or what have you.

But at least for Thais, I don't think Greek and Thai culture go very well, like oil and water.

That's a valid point, as he says it is a matter of culture clash. I'm around Thais far less often than Chinese, and I avoid dating people whose native language includes jokes about feeding the ducks, but there probably would have been a high context vs low context problem as well as Thais coming (as best I recall) from a culture that still includes things like bride price.

High context can be difficult because one has to be able to sort out the hints. Take Fiancee 2.1 proposing to me as an example. She sent me three pictures from a visit to a temple, prayers on a wooden tablet, the reverse side of the tablet, and the tablet hanging on the branch of a tree. I had to ask if she wanted to tell me the meaning of the prayers, to which she replied that she wanted to be with me, and from there I had to make the jump to understanding that to mean that she hoped we could marry. It would have been so easy to miss a hint and say "wow, nice pictures!" A friend who is Chinese and a professional translator filled in that the prayers were for our prosperity and to have kids, but it was old fashioned and formal language.

[Daneman]

Long story, a lot of factors, I bet.

I've had other Thais tell me the region she's from has something of a bad reputation.

What region? Mine is from udon thani originally but have been some time in denmark.

[Sliske]

I have a wife of 8 years, no kids and can get what I want within 0-3 pay checks, so yeah - i'm pretty happy with my life

[Doctor Amadeus]

I think being happy is fleeting and a temporary prospective. I'm totally satisfied though, but like everyone I've got things I'm still working on. Then maybe I'll be happy all the time.

[Stelio Kontos]

That's a valid point, as he says it is a matter of culture clash. I'm around Thais far less often than Chinese, and I avoid dating people whose native language includes jokes about feeding the ducks, but there probably would have been a high context vs low context problem as well as Thais coming (as best I recall) from a culture that still includes things like bride price.

High context can be difficult because one has to be able to sort out the hints. Take Fiancee 2.1 proposing to me as an example. She sent me three pictures from a visit to a temple, prayers on a wooden tablet, the reverse side of the tablet, and the tablet hanging on the branch of a tree. I had to ask if she wanted to tell me the meaning of the prayers, to which she replied that she wanted to be with me, and from there I had to make the jump to understanding that to mean that she hoped we could marry. It would have been so easy to miss a hint and say "wow, nice pictures!" A friend who is Chinese and a professional translator filled in that the prayers were for our prosperity and to have kids, but it was old fashioned and formal language.

Spot on. Bride Price was the first time serious cracks started in the relationship.

She essentially said I had to pay her Mother to marry her. And that my refusal showed I didn't respect her culture. I told her up until recently, Greeks used dowry, where the bride's family pays the groom's family. I told her we wouldn't do either and call it even that way, since if she insisted on an outdated bride price, I might as well insist on a dowry, so let's just call it even.

And communication was another issue. I won't say if it's culture or not, but conflict isn't something I shy away from. I can argue with someone over something and it doesn't ruin my day or my perception of them. But if we argued, she acted like the relationship was ruined. It was a weird situation where I thrived on conflict, and she wilted from it.

Not sure how that would go over with a Chinese girl. I had a co-worker from Singapore who kept saying she needed to find me a Chinese wife. Alas, that luckily never happened.