How to Get Loved Ones and Friends to Let You Play WoW

[Chefjayman]

How to Get Loved Ones and Friends to Let You Play WoW

or

Holy Crap Why Won't The People Around Me Let Me Play WoW and How Can I Get Them Off My Back So I Can!

So, like millions of people around the world, you like WoW. You may like it a little, you may like it alot, but any way you want to look at it, World of Warcraft is something you want to do with your free time and money. Now, for every person that likes it, theres possibly at least one person in their life that doesn't. One person (or perhaps more) that thinks its a waste ot time, money, bandwidth or brain cells. We as players might call these people.buzzkills, killjoys or any other number of outdated terms, they however have a different name for theselves. Friends and family. How can we as a community of hapless wow-geeks get these people to see that WoW is not as bad as they make it out to be. How do we let them know that WoW is not the devil incarnate, is not the soul sucking, life destroying time sink its been made out to be.....wait...scratch that, thats a little too close to the truth! How then do we hide, or at the very least, minimize these notions enough so that we can get some serious WoW time in on the home computer? read on friend, this guide might just be your answer.

Definition of the problem:

Before we get to the solutions, we must first define the problem at hand. Picture yourself at home, at work or at school. Perhaps you're on a night out with friends, at a family function or on a date. All these are good things, but man, carving that thanksgiving turkey won't give you the rep you need to buy that epic should enchant! Attempting to rush a date home partway through a movie because you just got a text from a guild mate saying "Dude! we're stuck in BWL man, we need yer epic shammy healz!" might be taken the wrong way, or perhaps you haven't yet played the game at all and are thinking of picking it up yet your (*insert relation here) sees this as a bad thing. Maybe you left the game at some point due to boredom, loss of time and/or money or at the deveopment of a "life" and now want back in to try out that sweet new expansion, yet you're faced with the "You said you weren't going back!" attack. These are the problems. People using their wiles, intellect or simple fact to derail your attempts at logging in. These...are the enemy!.

Friends...we don't need no stinking friends:

Friends...ahh the boon of life. the people you've met over time..the ones who "get" you. How in the world can you get the ones who've known you since kindergarten to let you "get your WoW on" when they do in fact know you better than anyone? Simple. Confound them. The best way to keep these hounds off the scent is to just change your scent! Transform yourself. Maybe you were always the intelligent one, the one they could always count on to make the right choice. Do a switcheroo and make wrong decisions! Tell everyone the reason you're at home all the time is because you're working on bringing your russian mail order bride back from Smolensk. Let them know you're in a fulfilling relationship with that random email you got from Uganda, and the fifeteen bucks a month thats disappearing from your account is helping "Ms. Roberta George" pay for that plane ticket for the trip over! Re-inforce this strategy by cutting a picture out a magazine, then show it to your friends and tell them that this is the person you're sending the money to. By re-making yourself in the direct opposite image your friends see you in, you can buy yourself time to play WoW as they meet to plan the intervention!

You can pick your friends, but not your family:

Blood relatives present a unique problem. Unlike friends who know you oh so well, family members know you equally as well, AND know all the tricks you've used in the past to deflect suspicion in previous endeavours. How then do you get family off your back so you can defeat the evils of Azeroth? Simple confounding may not work here. Family may see through the act you present to friends, so you may have to go that extra mile to convince your "kin". Change your "style". If you were the jock in highschool and want to deflect questions about why you're spending so much time holed up in your room, claim to have become a goth, and buy black cloths and white make up to strengthen the argument. If that doesn't work become a snake charmer. Use the downtime during weekly maintenance to go out and buy or find a couple garter snakes and a rattle then show off your new pets to your folks and tell them time behind closed doors is actually used training them. If they become nosey and want into your WoW-sanctum, use the rattle and tell them its not in their best interest.

Show your concern:

If those strategies don't seem to work for one reason or another, appeal to the sense of duty family and friends possess. Tell them you're renewing your subscription or you NEED to play because you don't want to lose your account like the hundred emails you receive a day from "Blizzard" suggest you will. Or perhaps you should renew because "Blizzard" had been nice enough to send you a hundred more emails a day inviting you to the cataclysm beta, invitations you never accepted. Logging back in to play the game after release "only seems like the nice thing to do."

If all else fails:

If nothing presented above works at all, then you might be forced to actually tell the truth. You'll now have to answer some deadly serious questions, dissuade concerns and stifle fears about WoWcrack....I mean World of warcraft. Here are some carefully crafted and (not)scientifically proven answers to help you in your quest.

Question/concern: "I read that World of Warcraft was an addictive game"
Answer: "No."

Question/concern: "You said you were bored of the game and never going back!"
Answer: "I believe when I said that I was possesed by satan and drunk, I can't be held at my word."

Question/concern: "You told me once you had no interest in playing that game."
Answer: "I have no recollection of that."

Keeping it real:

Now, if you've managed to secure your place among the heroes of Azeroth, you're going to have to keep on your toes by answering some tricky questions that may arise during your gaming sessions from time to time. Here are some handy answers to give for some of the tougher ones.

Question/concern: "You're spending too much time playing that game"
Answer: "Huh? Wha? Sorry, I couldn't hear you over my guildmates talking in Vent."

Question/concern: "Did you see that thing that happened on the news!"
Answer: "I know! I can't believe that Thrall left Garrosh In charge!"

Question/concern: "Are you playing that game because you're less interested in me?"
Answer: "Huh? Wha? Sorry, I couldn't hear you over my guildmates talking in Vent."

Question/concern: "Do you like these pants I bought today?"
Answer: "How much gold did those cost? If it was more that 3 gold 30 copper we're gonna vendor them. Hell I have 520 tailoring, I could have made you better ones, I would have skilled up too!"

Question/concern: "We never spend any time together anymore."
Answer: "Huh? Wha? Sorry, I couldn't hear you over my guildmates talking in Vent."

Question/concern: "We never go out anymore because you're always on that game. Lets go to a movie and get dinner out."
Answer: "Better idea. Pull up a chair because Cataclysm has all kinds of cutscenes to watch. If you're hungry let me just put down a fish feast.."

Question/concern: "I think you're gaining too much weight sitting at the computer all day playing that game."
Answer: "Huh? Wha? Sorry, I couldn't hear you over my guildmates talking in vent. Could you get me another Redbull and some more Oreos?"

Question/concern: "Could I use the computer for a minute, I need to check something out."
Answer: "Sorry no. I'm in the middle of Uldum and haven't opened the portal yet. Plus my Hearthstones on cooldown."

Question/concern: "I'm leaving you"
Answer: "Huh? Wha? Sorry, I couldn't hear you over my guildmates talking in Vent."

Now that you're armed with all this unbelievably useful information, your family and friends will be no match for your epicness, and surely you will not only get permission to play WoW, you'll be left alone for as long as you want in order to play! Congratulations my lord (or lady), may your days spent among the denizens of Azeroth be filled ith purples and your conquests beyone compare. Happy questing traveller!.