[Books] The tl;dr version of Harry Potter

[vazar-da-priest]

Since the final movie is coming out, i decided to give a shorthand version of each book for anyone that hasnt seen all of them, or has forgotten what happened.

Sorcerer's Stone:
Harry finds out he's a wizard, goes to hogwartz, finds out he's the only one to not be killed by the killing curse. and is now the arch enemy of lord voldemort who wants to kill him. Voldemort wants the sorcer's stone to create a an elixir of life which gives eternal life, er something like that. Anyways vodlemort doesnt have a body so he becomes part of another dude by creating a face on the back of his head. Harry finds the stone, and voldemort and his possessed body try to take it. Harry kills the possessed man with his hands. and voldemort is once again without his body and flies away. Harry finds out love is what saved him from dieing!

Chamber of Secrets:
Harry goes back to hogwartz and multiple students are being petrified. and apparently the "heir of slytheren has returned". hermoine figures out a basilisk (a big ass snake) is responsble for the attacks. harry finds a diary by tom riddle. the pages are empty, but they talk back to harry when he writes in it. it is then stolen by ron's little sister (who lost it earlier). ron's little sister is taken into the chamber of secrets. harry and ron decide to go save her. tom shows up and reveals he's been the one talking back. and ron's sister stole the book, he then possesed her through the book to open the chamber of secrets (which allowed the basilisk to go ape shit). tom then explains he is a memory stored within the diary and he is voldemort in his younger years. harry kills the basilisk and destroys the book killing the memory of tom riddle. and saves the day once again. lucius malfoy gave the book to ron's sister originally in order to get dumbledore fired.

Prisoner of azkaban
Harry goes to hogwarts again, some dude named sirius black has broken out of jail and everyone is flippin out. ron is dragged into the woods by a black dog. harry and friends figure out its actually sirius black (yeah like a druid). sirius black was thought to have betrayed harry's parents. when voldemort was after the potters, sirius becomes their secret-keeper. aka fidelius charm Description: A charm involving secret information hidden within the soul of a Secret-Keeper. This information is irretrievable until the Secret-Keeper chooses to reveal it; those who have the secret revealed to them cannot reveal it to others. Sirius tells harry that he had peter pettigrew become the new secret keeper, secretly, and that peter pettigrew was the actual betrayer. peter pettigrew admits it, and sirius black has cleared his name, but he gets captured so harry goes back in time to make him free. pettigrew gets away.

goblet of fire:
there is a tournament at hogwarts involving 3 schools. the tournamnet has various challenges and is extremely dangerous. harry is entered but is too young (he didnt enter himself). harry competes against 3 other students inorder to find a big cup. him and the robert pattonson both reach the finish line at the same time (which is a cup) and both decide to touch the cup at the same time (aka tieing). the cup turns out to be a port key. the are teleported a graveyard where robet pattenson is killed by wormtail ( a deatheater) wormtail ties up harry, and drops voldemort new frail body into a pot. voldemort needs harrys blood and various objects to come compeletely back to life. voldemort now has a new body and tries to kill harry. harry grabs robbert pattenson and touches the cup and escapes back to hogwartz. a new teacher named mad eyed moody, (but its actually a deatheater pretending to be mad eyed moody) is revealed to actually put harry's name in the selection for the tournament, knowing he would see voldemort at the end.

order of the phoenix
everyone thinks harry is a liar about voldemort's return. hogwartz gets a new defense against the dark arts teacher delorius umbrige. she is a bitch and doesnt teach them anything. so harry decides to create Dumbledores' ARmy which is a secret orginization of students learning defense magic. the group is discovered and dumbledore takes all the blame, resulting in his resignation. umbrige becomes the new head master (the ministry appoints her cuz they dont trust dumbledore). and makes tons of rules making hogwartz suck. harry and friends get rid of her. harry has a vision where he sees sirius being torutred at the ministry of magic.voldemort is sending harry this vision. harry goes with friends to find sirius but only meet voldemort and death eaters. harry and friends are saved by the order of the phoenix (sirus black and other ppl who are against the deatheaters and vodlemort). sirius is killed. voldemort shows up, and dumbledore shows up saves harry and has an epic duel with voldemort. a prophecy is revealed that only harry or voldemort can live.

half blood prince
harry is back at hogwartz. dumbledore shows harry voldemort's past in Pensieve ( a bowl of water which holds memories). harry finds out how voldemort became evil and that voldemort has stored his soul into 7 horcuruxes. "Two of these, young Voldemort's diary and his grandfather's ring, have already been destroyed. Of the remaining, one resides in Voldemort, one resides in Voldemort's snake, one is Slytherin's locket, and the other two are suspected to be hidden in objects belonging to Hufflepuff, or Ravenclaw." Draco is given orders from deatheaters to kill dumbledore. snape arrives at the scene before draco kills dumbledore, and does it himself. snape is under the unbreakable vow to protect draco/carry out his deed. if snape breaks it, he dies instantly. so knowing this he kills dumbledore so young draco is not a murderer. now the reader is really unsure if he is good or bad, since he has been serving as a double agent for dumbledore and voldemort.

deathly hallows part 1
harry sets out to find and destroy the remaining horcruxes. they figure out umbrige has one horcrux and steal it from her. they need to sword of griffindor to destroy it. harry finds it in a frozen pond. they destroy the horcrux. they are told about the deathly hallows, the cloak, the wand, and the ressurection stone. voldemort is searching for the elder wand, harry and friends are captured and taken to malfoy manor. in a battle to escape, dobby is killed, but everyone escapes, and voldemort eventually finds out the wand is with dumbledores body. voldemort opens his grave and takes the wand.

that was a bit longer than expected, but hey, its still super short compared to the damn books

[Patrickstarr]

Even though I wouldn't say its TL;DR, it was a very good read.

+rep.

[pateuvasiliu]

Damn books? BLASPHEMY.

The books are great and they showed me as a kid that reading CAN be fun.

Now think where the world will be now if all the kids drugging themselves and being addicted to games would open a book once in a while.

Reading, wether it's about culture or adventures or w/e is an important part of education and shouldn't be neglected.

[matherl]

thats definitely a tl"dr for like what? 3,500+ pages?

[Amry]

Why would you tl:dr; HP?

The book is far more enjoyable than the movies.

[kunah]

Thank you OP. You saved me a small fortune and alot of time.

[Bluey111]

i thought the tldr was snape killed dumbledore

[Deleted]

Even though it isn't a tl;dr it's still a nice shortened version, thanks man. Do a Deathly Hallows Part 2 once you've seen it please?

[Romire]

Even though it isn't a tl;dr it's still a nice shortened version, thanks man. Do a Deathly Hallows Part 2 once you've seen it please?

Please dont lol

Im watching it 2nite

[Liara]

Please dont lol

Im watching it 2nite

You'd be better off reading the book, the movies were awful and not at all loyal to the books, in my opinion.

[Deleted]

Moved thread.

[jaxus]

Conceding to the fact that you are trying to summarize a number of rather lengthy books, I have to say that while you say this is the "TL;DR" version, it is, in fact, too long, and hence I did not read it. By doing so I will continue to live in my indifferent realm where I have no idea what Harry Potter is about, nor do I care.

[Deleted]

I think a better TLR would be:

[Johnnyfakes]

Not a huge fan of the Harry Potter series but this was interesting. Maybe I'll go see part if I'm bored now...

[vazar-da-priest]

okay here's the real tl;dr

voldemort trys to kill harry when hes a baby. harry lives. voldemort loses his body, voldemort gets a new one. voldemort is now causing havok and trying to kill harry. harry needs to destroy all 7 horcruxes to kill voldemort.

this is pre deathly hallows part 2 btw

[Deleted]

Nyyyeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh

[Synaxis]

Why would you tl:dr; HP?

The book is far more enjoyable than the movies.

My thoughts exactly.

[vazar-da-priest]

My thoughts exactly.

lol