Wow, thank you all for the advice. I passed on what was on the first page and then the thread died off a bit so I figured that was that and am surprised to come back and find 2 more pages! A bit of an update for anyone that was interested, after passing on the advice (particularly the prot pally info since at the time there wasn't much DK info) I was informed that the pally will not be bothering to use the info because apparently she'll die if she drops her self healing talents/glyphs/whatever because despite 3 healing it apparently it's a healing issue =/. Our newly recruited monk argued that the dps should swap which worked for them in a flex run so I guess that's their new strat. In response to the issue being tank gear, I don't feel it is. This may be comparing apples to oranges but we had brought in a tank who is a friend from another server to dps one of our runs and he has 2ilvl's over our tanks (which are 555ilvl) and has no issues killing shredders on his own. He plays a warrior, hence the apples to oranges comparison, but was fairly insistent that with their gear it should be a non-issue.
I agree with the posters that say the dps shouldn't NEED to help with the shredders. I understand the sentiment of "just get it down and start progressing" but they aren't planning on just getting a Garrosh normal mode kill and calling it quits, they'd like to do heroics if they make it there in time. I feel everyone on the team should therefore be playing their "A-game" and having 2 tanks (1 of whom is RL) blaming every issue on the dps or healers isn't going to cut it on heroics. To be fair to them, there certainly ARE dps issues, and while I don't see it, there very well could be some kind of healing issue that needs to be looked into as well, but there is also clearly a tanking issue to look at and we won't get far with a "my shit don't stink"attitude. To that end I have sadly left my friends in this guild to join a team that is just starting out in SoO (late I know) but who's self reflective attitudes seem to be a better fit with mine.
Hopefully they take some (or all) of the advice offered in this thread since I would still love to hear that they've succeeded in the future, but it's too frustrating to search out advice and then have it ignored
. Thanks again everyone! I will remember this advice for my new team when we make it here if we end up needing it.