Why is every girl taken?

[mvaliz]

If you're shy you're lacking confidence. It's as simple as that.

You say that as if being shy is a problem/fault and is a bad thing.

So what if many women are attracted to Confidence? If that's the primary trait a woman is looking for in a relationship as opposed to elements like "connects/bonds on a deep emotional level" along with "shares almost exactly the same life goals" and "Has the exact same moral beliefs/understandings", is that really the kind of woman you want?

[Deleted]

You say that as if being shy is a problem/fault and is a bad thing.

So what if many women are attracted to Confidence? If that's the primary trait a woman is looking for in a relationship as opposed to elements like "connects/bonds on a deep emotional level" along with "shares almost exactly the same life goals" and "Has the exact same moral beliefs/understandings", is that really the kind of woman you want?

Well I would not consider it a good trait.

[WinniPriest]

Lower your standards?

[Lazy Gecko]

I feel as though Hollywood has indoctrinated us with the notion that when you (the protagonist, obviously) find yourself in a new community or company, the most attractive ladies of the bunch will obviously not be in a relationship.

[Deleted]

because we are awesome and the smart guys realize this and get us FAST.

- - - Updated - - -

You say that as if being shy is a problem/fault and is a bad thing.

So what if many women are attracted to Confidence? If that's the primary trait a woman is looking for in a relationship as opposed to elements like "connects/bonds on a deep emotional level" along with "shares almost exactly the same life goals" and "Has the exact same moral beliefs/understandings", is that really the kind of woman you want?

confidence alone means nothing, but seriously, I could never be with someone who is insecure/doesn't have some confidence. you need a minimum required for functioning in this world.

[Lord Pebbleton]

It dose suck but try to stop looking and see what finds you.

I second this. This is the best advice you can follow.

[Aeluron Lightsong]

I need to find a guy who hates sports as much as I do :P In a long term relationship w/a guy who only follows hockey casually, so I consider myself lucky. Sports nuts weird me out.

*Waves* Sports is boring.

[lupii]

-slowly raises hand- im...not...taken.

[Seani]

err no, a girl is taken when she wants to be in an exclusive relationship with a guy. it doesn't need to be a marriage or even living together. A guy doesn't get to decide if a girl is taken, the girl gets to decide if she is taken.

Alright well he can live in the real world, or your fantasy world Crissi.

[Durandro]

Well I would not consider it a good trait.

Cockiness is often confused with confidence. If I see someone babbermouthing and pushing their way into social situations I don't think "wow, that's a confident guy!" I think "wow, that guy is a jerk and is clearly overcompensating for something".

Some of the most confident people are quiet and reserved.

[Seani]

I see both your points tbh, I'd still openly engage in 'flirtatious' behaviour with a girl until the ring goes on the finger. No point being a total nice guy to a girl if you're interested in grabbing her for yourself at some point. In fact I've had 'the talk' with most of my good female friends, two of which have ended up in a try out when they where single, and I've never had any issues talking about it or any bad reactions. Imo its always good to talk with friends and let each other know where you stand, as long as you're both emotionally mature enough not to sit there waiting and hoping for the other to end their relationship for you.

To reiterate though: don't just be a creep and talk with a girl because you want to get some, look for friendship and more might follow from that.

I don't believe in any friend zones. If someone is being a girl's friend for the sole purpose of planting his flag in her later I would say that person has false expectation to what girlfriend actually is. Courting or dating is the test to see if you make good partners, marriage or living together exclusively means that your together. If two people are going out together those people are still fair game, by no chance are any of those people taken. It might be more difficult to snag her if she likes the guy, but she is still fair game nonetheless. Now if the guy she is dating is your friend, that is a whole different can of worms, but the guy doesn't have any sort of claim with her unless the two are sharing their finances together.

[Aeluron Lightsong]

Alright well he can live in the real world, or your fantasy world Crissi.

Sometimes girls like to play games. It's not a fantasy world.

[Tyrosa]

Are you American? Lol
http://jonathansoma.com/singles/

[Wilfire]

If you think being aggressive and assertive means being an asshole, you're doing it wrong. That you say you have to pretend just reinforces this. You were doing it wrong. You can be completely respectful towards other people, even nice, all the time, but still be confident, aggressive and assertive.

1.aggressive (comparative more aggressive, superlative most aggressive)
Tending or disposed to aggress; characterized by aggression; making assaults; unjustly attacking.
an aggressive policy, war, person, nation
2.assertive (comparative more assertive, superlative most assertive)
boldly self-assured; confident without being aggressive

congratulations, not only you completely misunderstood my point which was that i dont want to be a psychopath who changes personality to appeal to modern women, you completely disqualified yourself by saying you can be assertive and aggressive at same time, both of which are qualities that no longer have any use. To be successful you need to be CAREFUL, not assertive

[Notos]

Now if the guy she is dating is your friend, that is a whole different can of worms, but the guy doesn't have any sort of claim with her unless the two are sharing their finances together.

So would that mean it's ok to sleep with the girl while she is dating your friend then?

If someone is being a girl's friend for the sole purpose of planting his flag in her later I would say that person has false expectation to what girlfriend actually is.

Eh, those kinds of guys just want a lay, not a girlfriend.

[Hooliganz]

my friend u need to visit Odessa , Ukraine
plenty women to go around many cant find a husband :P

[Notos]

my friend u need to visit Odessa , Ukraine
plenty women to go around many cant find a husband :P

That's because the men are all alcoholics :P

Ok maybe that's generalizing, I haven't been to Odessa in like 10 years haha

[Vegemeat]

Oh my god, what point in destroying a relationship don't you understand? Seriously. You're hitting on her if you're flirting in a non obvious way. You're not supposed to do that. Where's the morale in that? How can you respect your own relationship if you can't respect others? You can flirt yes, but not with taken girls. I would love to see how you can trust that girl afterwards. Seriously, BAD TIP. BADBAD.

You really need to work on your trust issues. Your low self esteem is literally oozing through every single one of your posts.

[smelltheglove]

-slowly raises hand- im...not...taken.

you're in nova scotia. the men that try to find their way up there freeze their nuts off

[Seani]

So would that mean it's ok to sleep with the girl while she is dating your friend then?

Its ok as long as that friend isn't African American if he is, and you decide to sleep with the girl anyway that is just racist!