The person above you critically fails the action he describes. What is the outcome?

[Deleted]

I go to see the Haunted House they put up for Halloween

You trip on a cardboard ghost, it falls down the stairs, explodes and destroys the house.. the heat from the fire then causes your car which you parked in front of the house to explode which in turn leads to chain reaction of explosions that destroy half the block.

I grab a shovel, head to the nearest cemetery and try to wake the dead.

[Adam Jensen]

You trip on a cardboard ghost, it falls down the stairs, explodes and destroys the house.. the heat from the fire then causes your car which you parked in front of the house to explode which in turn leads to chain reaction of explosions that destroy half the block.

I grab a shovel, head to the nearest cemetery and try to wake the dead.

And on the way, you get hit by a bus, die on the way to the hospital, get buried . . . and the rise a year later when someone else tries to raise the dead.

I'm gonna embark on a dangerous quest to acquire the mythical AC adapter for a Lenovo Y50.

[Omertocracy]

I'm gonna embark on a dangerous quest to acquire the mythical AC adapter for a Lenovo Y50.

After years of perilous searching (and gaining ten levels), you finally find a dragon who you kill. In its hoard is the adapter for a Lenovo Y40.

I suggestively eat a Choco Taco.

[Adam Jensen]

After years of perilous searching (and gaining ten levels), you finally find a dragon who you kill. In its hoard is the adapter for a Lenovo Y40.

I suggestively eat a Choco Taco.

And then realize it's not a choco taco, its the biggest dildo ever invented. Too late, it's already in your mouth.

Gonna go grocery shopping, brb.

[worprz]

And then realize it's not a choco taco, its the biggest dildo ever invented. Too late, it's already in your mouth.

Gonna go grocery shopping, brb.

When you trip down your stairs paralyzing yourself for life. Now you will never go to the grocery store for yourself again.

I go to do some push ups.

[Dendrek]

When you trip down your stairs paralyzing yourself for life. Now you will never go to the grocery store for yourself again.

I go to do some push ups.

And figuring you're strong enough to handle it, you put a 300 lb weight on your back. One of your friends finds you flattened on the floor a few days later.

I'm thinking of a number from 1 to 10.

[GennGreymane]

You instantly think of 23 and go as crazy as Jim Carrey


I'm on a boat with Natalie Portman.

[Dendrek]

You instantly think of 23 and go as crazy as Jim Carrey


I'm on a boat with Natalie Portman.

And as you mellow out from your drunken stupor, you realize the terrible mistake you've made: You're on a boat with Natalia Porkman, a 300 lb stripper who you've succeeded in convincing that you're up for anything she wants to do.

(That'll teach you for making me go crazy... and calling me Jim Carrey, you heathen.)

I'm about to watch one of my all time favorite movies.

[worprz]

And as you mellow out from your drunken stupor, you realize the terrible mistake you've made: You're on a boat with Natalia Porkman, a 300 lb stripper who you've succeeded in convincing that you're up for anything she wants to do.

(That'll teach you for making me go crazy... and calling me Jim Carrey, you heathen.)

I'm about to watch one of my all time favorite movies.

When you realize that the movie is at your cousin in laws house in Georgia. You decide to take the long drive to your cousin in laws to get the movie. When you arrive your cousin tells you that she sold it in a yard sale. She tells you the name of the man who bought it and you decide to pay him a visit. When you find the man you try and convince him to give it to you, you even suggest that you will pay for it. The man gets so angry that he shoots you and your last thoughts were that you had a second copy at home in your attic.

I'm about to bite into the tastiest looking burger of all time.

[YuneKirby]

I'm about to bite into the tastiest looking burger of all time.

The burger is completely raw inside and you get food poisoning, spending most of the next 48 hours in the bathroom.

I'm shopping online for some new underwear.

[x_Fiona_X]

The burger is completely raw inside and you get food poisoning, spending most of the next 48 hours in the bathroom.

I'm shopping online for some new underwear.

As you're shopping online, your screen begins to transform before you! As the display becomes distorted, the face of Nicolas Cage appears, shooting killer bees out to your face. You run off into the distance shouting "OH, NO! NOT THE BEES! NOT THE BEES! AAAAAHHHHH! OH, THEY'RE IN MY EYES! MY EYES! AAAAHHHHH! AAAAAGGHHH!" (I may or may not have just watched The Wicker man..)

I'm about to go make a strawberry milkshake.

[WintersLegion]

After you drink the entire shake you realize that strawberries are disgusting causing you to rethink your entire life

I go look into the mirror

[KeirAdish]

After you drink the entire shake you realize that strawberries are disgusting causing you to rethink your entire life

I go look into the mirror

Bloody Mary appears behind you and kills you.


I take some Nyquil and lay down so I can sleep before doctor in the morning.

[Nekrotix]

You take the whole bottle by accident and fall into such a deep sleep you do not awaken for many days. They presume you dead and have a whole funeral for you, when you wake up, you get up and notice that there's barely anyone who showed up for your funeral. At that point you wish you were dead.

I take a walk in the park and enjoy the sights.

[Forgettable]

You take the whole bottle by accident and fall into such a deep sleep you do not awaken for many days. They presume you dead and have a whole funeral for you, when you wake up, you get up and notice that there's barely anyone who showed up for your funeral. At that point you wish you were dead.

I take a walk in the park and enjoy the sights.

Unfortunately for you the park is the current location of a 50 year high school reunion for an all boys school and the designated activity de jour is sunbathing. You (figuratively) go blind from seeing thirty wrinkly old men in speedos.

I am opening a jar of pickles in the kitchen.

[Jpp]

Unfortunately for you the park is the current location of a 50 year high school reunion for an all boys school and the designated activity de jour is sunbathing. You (figuratively) go blind from seeing thirty wrinkly old men in speedos.

I am opening a jar of pickles in the kitchen.

You manage to open the jar and are about to grab a pickle when a piranha reaches out of the jar and bites off your finger.

I switch tabs back to WCS America final.

[n7stormreaver]

Accidentally, you switch 2 tabs further to some horrific hentai. Someone enters the room.

I'm typing this post, and then...

[Nekrotix]

You accidentally type something really offensive, something so horrible that it gets on the front page and all your friends see it. You are eternally shamed.

I go to film a documentary on Lizards.

[WintersLegion]

You find you really love lizards and the documentary ends up getting you put in jail for inappropriate behavior with animals

I read a book

[Adam Jensen]

You find you really love lizards and the documentary ends up getting you put in jail for inappropriate behavior with animals

I read a book

That book happens to A Storm of Swords and suddenly you get sucked into the events of the book, and the Freys mistake you for Robb Stark at the Red Wedding.

Gonna go make myself a sandwich.