If your girlfriend cheated on you with another girl...

[Deleted]

If what your girlfriend needs is another pussy, then she has to look externally.

See that's the problem, associating sex with individualistic ideals. I love sex, with my fiance. Overall though I can do without it. I can't provide a comparable socio-economic background for discussion with her, that doesn't mean she feels the need to only discuss comparable issues with me.

Do you honestly only associate sex with "fun"? Then why bother with a relationship at all? Just have FWB.

[Jakexe]

Actually had an ex cheat on my with another women. I always thought it'd be hot so it was strange when I found out, and this is after the relationship was over and we had a rocky friendship, it was fairly hurtful and I felt betrayed. Granted this is also because she was very jealous and always thought I was cheating on her when I never did so the the hypocrisy on her part didn't help.

[Wishblade]

Obviously I can't say how I'd react, but I'd still be hurt, it's still cheating after all.

[rayvio]

cheating is cheating, doesn't matter who it's with or what the circumstances are, it's unforgivable

[Themius]

My boyfriend cheated on me with a girl. I wasn't very pleased.

[slime]

cheating is cheating, it brings emotions out that will or can destroy relationships.

I sorta see it like this. But, if it goes all the way and she leaves you for another girl I'd say that's a little easier to handle than being left for another guy. Only because you can rationalize that she just has a thing for furburgers and nothing you could really do to accommodate that, but if left for another man you might start doubting yourself and beating yourself up for not being more of what she wanted from a man.

[Dabrix32]

How is that a bad thing? Who doesnt dream of their GF doing another chick?

[florestan]

The former. Realistically if everyone answering had a girlfriend they actually cared about and then she cheated on them with anyone they'd be bothered by it to say the very least, regardless of gender (though I'm not denying the extent to which they're bothered could theoretically differ depending on it). If not then either there's something wrong far as the psychological side of things goes with the person at hand or there's some fundamental instinctual response that somehow makes it okay for someone's partner to cheat so long as it's with someone of the same sex that we are not yet aware of.

That's pretty easy to explain.

His woman having sex with another man is very bad for the man as it means that he might end up providing unknowingly for another man's child (a tremendous waste of resources for him) and given the long gestation period he is likely to have fewer children of his own with her.
Men who are jealously guarding their women from other men are likely to raise more children that carry their own genetic makeup (including the trait for jealousy) than "open-minded" men. It's an evolutionary advantage.

Being jealous of a woman confers no such advantage so why should that trait have been selected for over the course of human evolution?
Two women making out together bears absolutely no risk of them having a child. There's no reason for the man to be offended. Maybe he can even mate with both of them...

The woman guards her man jealously as the resources he can provide are limited and she wants as much of them to go towards her own children as possible. For her, too, a relationship of her man with another man is less threatening than him having a relationship with another woman.

[Algorath]

Fair amount of single people / people who have only ever been in short relationships here it seems...

On topic; I would be 90% as angry and hurt if my gf was with a chick, compared to if she was with a man..

The 10% extra hurt would be from the thought that she was more physically attracted to, as well as drawn to another mans personality than of mine, that would be a massive blow to ones self-confidence.. If it was with a girl, then I guess that blow to your masculinity wouldnt be there

[Deleted]

How is that a bad thing? Who doesnt dream of their GF doing another chick?

How was your last long term relationship?

[DEATHETERNAL]

That would be even worse as it would make me question my own judgment (relating to how I perceived her) even more so than if she had been with another guy. Apart from that, any cheating would kill the relationship/marriage.

[Ayonel]

I told my girlfriend she can do anything she wants with another woman. A vagina is something I cannot provide for her, so if she wants a vagina, than she is more than free. It wouldn't bother me in the slightest. Now if she started becoming more attached to her than me..that would be a problem.

If she cheated on me with a man, than yes, I would be freakin pissed.

Would you prefer that she engage in sex with other women with your knowledge or without it? would she mind if you had sex with other women and/or men? Would she like to have you join her when she is with other women?

I'll freely admit that I'm conservative when it comes to relationships, but from what I've seen, very few people can handle sharing if they care about the person in the relationship. It might start out ok, but then someone's place in the hierarchy turns out to be something other than what they thought(I.e. they aren't #1) and it all goes to hell.

[Chief Brouhaha]

Ever see Friends? His wife cheats on his with a girl and eventually leaves him for her. I would be furious still. Betrayal of trust

[Ayonel]

How is that a bad thing? Who doesnt dream of their GF doing another chick?

I don't. I wouldn't want to open up that giant bag of crazy with someone I actually cared about. Too much cutlery is involved.

[Deleted]

That's pretty easy to explain.

His woman having sex with another man is very bad for the man as it means that he might end up providing unknowingly for another man's child (a tremendous waste of resources for him) and given the long gestation period he is likely to have fewer children of his own with her.
Men who are jealously guarding their women from other men are likely to raise more children that carry their own genetic makeup (including the trait for jealousy) than "open-minded" men. It's an evolutionary advantage.

Being jealous of a woman confers no such advantage so why should that trait have been selected for over the course of human evolution?
Two women making out together bears absolutely no risk of them having a child. There's no reason for the man to be offended. Maybe he can even mate with both of them...

The woman guards her man jealously as the resources he can provide are limited and she wants as much of them to go towards her own children as possible. For her, too, a relationship of her man with another man is less threatening than him having a relationship with another woman.

That actually makes a lot of sense in a very primal way which was indeed what I was referring to but it's still such a subjective and theoretical matter, not everyone that would "guard" their partner necessarily wants children even, although one can argue that subconsciously and yadda yadda everyone does want them I guess - what I'm saying is pragmatically speaking I would be lead to believe there would be way more reason for the man to be offended when his woman cheats on him with another woman even because it's pretty much the epitome of sexual ineffectuality. People will always try to find a way to reason around this and just say there are needs a man can't satisfy or some shit like that but realistically... Well.

Also I don't think the first, most natural response(s) after being faced with such a situation (regardless of gender) is them worrying about their partner possibly having a child with the "other". You get pissed off. Or you get sad. You get annoyed that you seemingly weren't good enough and they had to go around having it out with someone they don't even have feelings for. That's what I believe the majority of people have against "sharing". People who are proud of having an open relationship or what have you I can't comment on, but obviously there's something different going on there than my comprehension can reach, or maybe they're just fooling themselves into thinking they having feelings for the person they're with when they actually don't. I have no idea.

[Deleted]

See that's the problem, associating sex with individualistic ideals. I love sex, with my fiance. Overall though I can do without it. I can't provide a comparable socio-economic background for discussion with her, that doesn't mean she feels the need to only discuss comparable issues with me.

It's great that you can do without sex, for some people sex is quite important.

Do you honestly only associate sex with "fun"? Then why bother with a relationship at all? Just have FWB.

Sex is important in a relationship. Maybe not to some people, but I'm sure to most. I mean what are you trying to argue here? That when I can't have sex I should just go play scrabble instead?

[Deleted]

Do you guys imagine it always be a very hot girl that your girlfriend is going to be with? Her taste into women might not be yours.
What if the women she wants to have sex with is someone like this?

You still get turned on because its a woman? Or like the idea your girlfriend is eating muffins at her bakery ?
I wonder if guys automaticly think its going to be a hot girl they'd like to see.



Or do you feel like you get to decide what kind of girl she sleeps with?

[Deleted]

Do you guys imagine it always be a very hot girl that your girlfriend is going to be with? Her taste into women might not be yours.
What if the women she wants to have sex with is someone like this?

You still get turned on because its a woman? Or like the idea your girlfriend is eating muffins at her bakery ?
I wonder if guys automaticly think its going to be a hot girl they'd like to see.



Or do you feel like you get to decide what kind of girl she sleeps with?

I'd hit that anyway

[Tosu]

Cheating is cheating, irrelevant of the gender they do it with.

^^ This ^^.

A relationship is between two people, the addition of a third regardless of gender is against the rules of a relationship.

[Deleted]

I'd hit that anyway

I suppose tastes differ. I just don't think the 1st middle aged woman is what the majority of guys on mmo-c are into.
But i'm sure you're very serious.