How do you break up with someone? What’s the best way?

[Rendark]

Tell them to fuck off. This does two things. First it gets them to go away, witch is what you want and second it makes them think you are a asshole so they get over it a lot quicker.

[MisterBigglez]

The advice here seems a bit split.

Ask yourself this. Do you really want to break up with her? If your only reason to break up with her is because theres some other guy she might be interested in, then maybe shes better off with him. Are you not going to fight for her? Do you even need to? As people have mentioned, he's her ex for a reason.

I personally wouldn't jump to conclusions. I take it you haven't seen this guy yet with her. Why not see what happens when you both meet him together. It's pretty common for ex's who leave off on a good note to occasionally meet up or keep in contact. Maybe shes testing you? Who knows, see what happens!

[Frolk]

What’s the best way to break up with someone without hurting thwm? Someone I’m in love with I have just realised works so much better with their ex who came to visit. The way they interact and get on, as much as I hate it, they could never be like that with me. So free, so open and they get on so well. He ticks all the boxes and the only reason they didn’t work out the first time wa because he wa forced to move out off the country. But won a case recently that allows him back and he is back. They get on so well. My partner is thinking of going to visit him, wants me to come, but I know it’s just courtesy.

This is perhaps time to cut my losses and let them reconnect, I feel like staying isblike standing in nature’s way. Utter 3rd wheel, it sucks, but they do get on so well together. I feel like the one who they settled for because the first choice wasn’t available at the tine. What do I do?

How do I break it up tactfully

Fake ur own death

[The5thVegetable]

In my opinion? Just be as blunt as humanly possible: Tell them you feel they may be better off in that other relationship, and tell them that it's okay for them to leave you if that's what they want.

Ultimately though? Let it be their decision. If you truly want to break it up with as little pain as possible for them- don't be the first to walk away.

P.S. Might be worth pointing out that you just want them to be happy. If their happiness is what you want, and they know that, they might have an easier time with it.

[Belize]

A shovel .

[Sinyc]

if he gets on well with her, then more than likely he will end up cheating. I'd say stay around till u catch it, then you can end it with no baggage.

ROFL. This is quite possibly the worst "advice" ever. If you don't feel you have THAT connection with the girl, just tell her that. There is no reason to waste the time of both parties..

[LiiLoSNK]

Fake your own death.

[ls-]

This is the most idiotic reason to break up, I have ever seen.

This.

As for the process, do it in person, ignore tears. It's gonna be a mess regardless.

[jimboa24]

The best way to break up? By text, obviously. Or have one of your friends do it for you. Or just start seeing someone else and ignore them completely, stop taking their calls and texts, and just let nature take its course. They'll figure it out eventually.

[Deleted]

Had an ex break up with me over WoW >.>

Anyways sounds like OP has a confidence issue. If you're not willing to fix that OP then just break up with her face to face asap. Insecurity dooms relationships and you seem to be insecure in yours

Hey babe, carry my alt
* run finishes*
btw you and me are totes over

- - - Updated - - -

Few key things you should know about the situation.

1. They are totally out of my league, it is some stroke of luck I managed to get a 10 interested
2. Says I’m cute, but I think it’s just because they are nice. I’m thinking I’m only around cos I’m the safe and comfortable option.
3. I’m also the nice guy. Like I’m really nice. I just can’t be nasty or a bad boy and chicks always dig the bad boys. The nice guy is never picked by the hot girl as 1st choice and usually the rebound option - I feel like that. and I can help being me. Cant help being sweet and nice. Even tried to change bug couldn’t. I’m not wired to be a prick.
4. I’m totally in love. So much so, I’m willing to let the person go because I know them with their ex would truly make them happy v
5. I’m very new and poor at relationships. My longest has been 4 months. And that was 2 yrs ago. So I don’t know any tricks or ways except honesty from the heart which always seems to cause the break ups

Be direct and tell her how this feels to you without ending the relationship first.
Maybw you are misunderstanding the situation or maybe she is banging him behind your back

[Lynarii]

What’s the best way to break up with someone without hurting thwm? Someone I’m in love with I have just realised works so much better with their ex who came to visit. The way they interact and get on, as much as I hate it, they could never be like that with me. So free, so open and they get on so well. He ticks all the boxes and the only reason they didn’t work out the first time wa because he wa forced to move out off the country. But won a case recently that allows him back and he is back. They get on so well. My partner is thinking of going to visit him, wants me to come, but I know it’s just courtesy.

This is perhaps time to cut my losses and let them reconnect, I feel like staying isblike standing in nature’s way. Utter 3rd wheel, it sucks, but they do get on so well together. I feel like the one who they settled for because the first choice wasn’t available at the tine. What do I do?

How do I break it up tactfully

The best way to handle this is with openness and honesty. Sit down with your partner, talk to her, explain your feelings and what you're thinking. You may be wrong about how she feels about this other guy, I get along really well with one of my ex's but I would /never/ want to be more than friends with that person again. But ultimately, realize that you are not responsible for her feelings. If you're open and honest with her, and she feels hurt by it, that is not your fault. You need to come out of this feeling like you're being true to yourself first and foremost, obviously you don't want to hurt her for no reason, but I think in the long run most people will respect honesty over being bullshitted 'for their own good'.

Few key things you should know about the situation.

1. They are totally out of my league, it is some stroke of luck I managed to get a 10 interested
2. Says I’m cute, but I think it’s just because they are nice. I’m thinking I’m only around cos I’m the safe and comfortable option.
3. I’m also the nice guy. Like I’m really nice. I just can’t be nasty or a bad boy and chicks always dig the bad boys. The nice guy is never picked by the hot girl as 1st choice and usually the rebound option - I feel like that. and I can help being me. Cant help being sweet and nice. Even tried to change bug couldn’t. I’m not wired to be a prick.
4. I’m totally in love. So much so, I’m willing to let the person go because I know them with their ex would truly make them happy v
5. I’m very new and poor at relationships. My longest has been 4 months. And that was 2 yrs ago. So I don’t know any tricks or ways except honesty from the heart which always seems to cause the break ups

1) You don't get to decide your league. She decides if you're in her league or not, just like you decide if she's in yours or not. Deal with it.
2) Again, you don't get to decide if you're cute or not. She does. Deal with it.
3) Chicks don't always dig the bad boys. What they do tend to dig are people with some degree of self confidence. It's a serious turnoff to have a partner who is so insecure that they sabotage all the good things in the relationship out of fear that it'll fail anyway. You can be sweet and nice and an amazing partner. Being a prick is NOT the way to do this.
4) Wonderful!
5) Honesty from the heart is the best set of 'tricks or ways' I know. If you have to lie to someone to keep them in your life, then they aren't the right person for you. If you're going to make a life with someone, they WILL get to know who you really are sooner or later. Better to get that out of the way at the start. It will only cause breakups with people that you would end up breaking up with at some point anyway.

[Shelly]

Leave the smaller bit of a beheaded horse in her bed.

[Mirishka]

What’s the best way to break up with someone without hurting thwm? Someone I’m in love with I have just realised works so much better with their ex who came to visit. The way they interact and get on, as much as I hate it, they could never be like that with me. So free, so open and they get on so well. He ticks all the boxes and the only reason they didn’t work out the first time wa because he wa forced to move out off the country. But won a case recently that allows him back and he is back. They get on so well. My partner is thinking of going to visit him, wants me to come, but I know it’s just courtesy.

This is perhaps time to cut my losses and let them reconnect, I feel like staying isblike standing in nature’s way. Utter 3rd wheel, it sucks, but they do get on so well together. I feel like the one who they settled for because the first choice wasn’t available at the tine. What do I do?

How do I break it up tactfully

Honesty, plain and simple. E.g. "I see what you two have I don't feel like you and I will ever have that."

This isn't a malicious sort of situation, on either person's part, so there's no need for twisting your brain over how to end things. Just be honest about the way you feel.

[Wingerie]

Coming from a guy who broke after 5 years with the soulmate:

What’s the best way to break up with someone without hurting thwm?

It will always hurt if you care about each other.

Someone I’m in love with I have just realised works so much better with their ex who came to visit. The way they interact and get on, as much as I hate it, they could never be like that with me. So free, so open and they get on so well. He ticks all the boxes and the only reason they didn’t work out the first time wa because he wa forced to move out off the country. But won a case recently that allows him back and he is back. They get on so well. My partner is thinking of going to visit him, wants me to come, but I know it’s just courtesy.

Relationships aren't about checking boxes in a checklist. They might get better with e/o in some aspects but that doesn't mean your partner wishes to go back to that person. There are couple of reasons to that:
1. They had something special together and break up peacefully;
2. They can hang out together like that because they don't feel need to try to make relationship;
3. It might've worked previously, but might not work now because all three of you are in different conditions compared to the past.

Etc etc.

And don't assume the reasoning why your partner wants you to join them, ask, always ask.

This is perhaps time to cut my losses and let them reconnect, I feel like staying isblike standing in nature’s way. Utter 3rd wheel, it sucks, but they do get on so well together. I feel like the one who they settled for because the first choice wasn’t available at the tine. What do I do?

I don't think it's really your decision whether they'll restore their relationship. You're just afraid to be hurt even more in case of your partner will decide to break up with you, you feel insecure. What do you do when you're feeling insecure in relationships? You talk with your partner. Or maybe you're just looking for a reason to break up (just like I did).

How do I break it up tactfully

You explain the reasons and give the lead to your ex-partner on how they want to handle it. You should not avoid them or block in social networks unless they're going super toxic or something. Understand, that they've been hurt and betrayed by the most important human in their life. Offer support if they want to talk, but it should be their decision.

×××

Few key things you should know about the situation.

1. They are totally out of my league, it is some stroke of luck I managed to get a 10 interested
2. Says I’m cute, but I think it’s just because they are nice. I’m thinking I’m only around cos I’m the safe and comfortable option.
3. I’m also the nice guy. Like I’m really nice. I just can’t be nasty or a bad boy and chicks always dig the bad boys. The nice guy is never picked by the hot girl as 1st choice and usually the rebound option - I feel like that. and I can help being me. Cant help being sweet and nice. Even tried to change bug couldn’t. I’m not wired to be a prick.
4. I’m totally in love. So much so, I’m willing to let the person go because I know them with their ex would truly make them happy v
5. I’m very new and poor at relationships. My longest has been 4 months. And that was 2 yrs ago. So I don’t know any tricks or ways except honesty from the heart which always seems to cause the break ups

1. BS, this is not a sport, not a competition, there are no leagues;
2. There is nothing wrong in being safe and comfortable person, that's what most people look for in relationships. Not the sex, not fantastic exotic experiences and other edgy BS;
3. Another BS, there are girls who like punks, there are girls who like homeboys, there are all kind of girls who like all kinds of guys;
4. I know that feeling, but that's not your decision;
5. Noone is ever good at relationships at the beginning, you're working together through the shit and dirt, learn how to handle stuff etc. Just chill and let it go.

[Spiral Mage]

Honesty is always the best policy.
You tell them what you want to do, and why you want to do it.
There's never any other method or way than being honest.

It sounds like you're just being insecure, so you should address your insecurities with your partner first.
Like someone else said, they're an EX for a reason. It's over. There's a reason for it.
This person is with YOU now, not them.
You may think you know what's better, but you don't. They made their choice.
Just say "I feel like I'm holding you back from (X), are you sure you're happier with me?"
Or something like that.

Talk out your issues, let them decide.
If they decide you're right, then you were already bracing for it and can let them go easier.
If they decide you're wrong, then don't piss it away over nothing.

Always. Talk. To. Your. Partner.
Miscommunication/cowardice/dishonesty are your worst enemies.

[flyspyro]

what?!??! What kind of girlfriend or boyfriend stays says they wan to hang out with an ex??!???! if she cant see how f*cked up this is- release her like a trout and move on quickly.. say this- " I care about you and I want you to be happy but I feel like you are not in it with me and I need to move on." If she says she is...... then say "wtf are you wanting to hang out with some ex?"

[Deleted]

Its not you its me

It's actually the other way round. What you should say is "It's not me, it's you. Buh-bye."

[xcitng]

She wants to go visit her ex? your relationship is doomed.

[Destinas]

A lot of this is from your perspective and about how you feel because of that. What is your partner's say in all of this? Try not to base how much your partner loves you by how easily they get along with their ex. That has little to do with you, and has absolutely no bearing on your current relationship. Honestly, has your partner been any less nice or loving to you since their ex has visited again? Is their visit permanent? Because you made it sound like it was a temporary visit, and not permanent.

Sure, they may have broken up with that person for an odd circumstance, but you're their current partner at the moment. Had they really wanted to work things out, they could have tried a long-distance relationship. It's not easy, but people do it all the time. They didn't, so your partner chose you. If you feel that your partner wants to be with them instead of you, then honestly and bluntly ask. It's not like they are powerless in this relationship, and it's not like you have more or less of a say.

Honestly, it just all sounds like you're jumping to conclusions inside your own head. Good relationships are built on a foundation of trust, honesty, and an open dialogue. I apologize for being harsh, but in this post I see that all of those traits need to be worked on. Best of luck.

[Iggy Iguana]

Buy her some balloons and a card.