A guild I was in for seven years disbanded today

[tmkai]

Man he did such a great job as the joker.... was such a good actor.

[randomnamegenerator16]

Why wasn't she kicked in instant then?

[Schmoyan89]

Unfortunaly a chick destroyed our guild from the inside with bitching and passive aggressiveness.

The problem began when she started wanting to raid after beginning a long distance relationship with an officer of the guild. She actually demanded people say hello to her when she logged in and expected to get by with poor game play plus flirting.

He bugged everyone, all the time, about her and how she needed to be made a raider. She would fuck up on such a consitent basis, that you believe she did it on purpose.

The whole guild fell apart. I look back and wonder what I could have done to prevent this.

Have any of you dealt with similar behavior?

Faced this and honestly it is usually a show of poor management decisions and overall cowardice from guild officers.

[Deleted]

Had the same thought. I'm guessing they had a median age of about 15.

A similar stuff happened in my FFXIV's guild and the involved people had 27 ish years old on average. They (the girl and one of the guy who was seduced) were booted off the guild before major issues arose though.

There were several girls in this guild and that one single handedly managed to make all the other leave the guild x)

[The One Percent]

Unfortunately, many gamers are little beta bitches that will forsake their friends for even a whiff of pussy.

[BananaHandsB]

Sounds like she did you a favor. A guild that can be broken apart by a single chick can't be that great.

[unbound]

One single chick "destroyed your guild"? Sounds more like a bunch of chumps to me. It's amazing how guys manage to be the worst clowns possible and then when everything goes down the shitter, it's the chick who did it. Well how was she even able to? Happens in real life all the time.

Yep. This is pretty much my read as well.

Having been in a few guilds over the many years of WoW (as well as leading one), I call BS on the tale. I've never seen a single person do anything like that kind of damage. There are always a few weak players in the guild, including in the raids.

[BatteredSausage]

We had a girl in the guild a few years ago, all the virgin boys would drool over her voice in TS....that is untill they all saw a picture of her. She may of had a seductive voice over TS but fuck me she was a right Munster....
No one cared after that.

[Maculo]

I had a similar experience. A female healer embedded herself with some of the officers, and things went downhill from there. It caused a rift, and I remember her playing both sides of the officers. She would be nice upfront, but trash them on vent when they were absent. To make matters worse, some of the officers were teenagers, who did not cope well.

Not all female players act like the one I described above, but this situation happens just enough where it becomes a category of its own.

[thilicen]

Unfortunaly a chick destroyed our guild from the inside with bitching and passive aggressiveness.

The problem began when she started wanting to raid after beginning a long distance relationship with an officer of the guild. She actually demanded people say hello to her when she logged in and expected to get by with poor game play plus flirting.

He bugged everyone, all the time, about her and how she needed to be made a raider. She would fuck up on such a consitent basis, that you believe she did it on purpose.

The whole guild fell apart. I look back and wonder what I could have done to prevent this.

Have any of you dealt with similar behavior?

Why wasn't that officer simply given the following ultimatum: "Shut the fuck up or get the fuck out" ? Better that than having the whole thing fall apart over some bullshit like that.

[Sosoulsu]

One single chick "destroyed your guild"? Sounds more like a bunch of chumps to me. It's amazing how guys manage to be the worst clowns possible and then when everything goes down the shitter, it's the chick who did it. Well how was she even able to? Happens in real life all the time.

As a woman: Bitches are crazy, and they make normally rational guys crazy too.
You don't know their situation, and assuming the worst just to defend m'lady's honor is pretty pathetic.

- - - Updated - - -

Why wasn't that officer simply given the following ultimatum: "Shut the fuck up or get the fuck out" ? Better that than having the whole thing fall apart over some bullshit like that.

Social sabotage.

[Deleted]

Well kinda. In our guild, the GM and one of the healers were dating. No need to mention that the girl was one of the worse performing players in raids, which he understood and promptly sat her on most progression bosses. During BRF shit got pretty bad and I'm not sure if this is the reason we disbanded before 6.2, but the girl left the guy for someone else she met on League of Legends, and they continued to live under the same roof for weeks, and this is like a week after he bought her an engagement ring, for fuck's sake. I didn't know at the time that this was happening (neither did most others except the officers I guess), but hearing him talk about it on mumble after the ordeal was really hard. Just one example that I remember is after she had broken up with him but still living with him, he once during a progress boss asked is she could be a bit quieter because he was explaining stuff on mumble. Her reply (paraphrasing): "Do you always have to be so selfish?". Hearing that made so fucking mad at her.

TL;DR fuck relationships within the guild.

[Deleted]

Wow, I like my guild more and more for every page I read in this thread. Apparently we manage to break nearly every rule of thumb for preventing drama:

*) Female GM, officer and raiders. Not even sure how many there are.
*) Several couples in the guild, including the GM being married to one of the MTs.
*) Plenty of social members in a raiding guild. I haven't raided seriously with the guild since BT, so am a social myself.

However, what we also have:

*) Pretty strict and clear cut rules for behavior, membership status, loot distribution (DKP) etc.
*) Only 18+ *and* mature behavior allowed. End of discussion.
*) Guild has been around since Classic, and the core of the guild is used to the quirks and habits of most everyone.

We will be here for Legion as well, and the next expac after that as well.

[therealbowser]

Ultimately if one player was able to destroy your guild, that one player wasn't the problem. It was the rest of the guild.

99% of the time (exaggerating slightly, obviously... but bear with me) when longer-term guilds are disbanded, it is because they relied heavily upon the leadership, and when the leadership stepped down or moved on, they either had really bad leadership take its place or no one was interested in taking the responsibility and the guild inevitably fell apart.

What could you have done? Well, it's hard to say. If you had the opportunity of taking up a leadership position, you could have probably helped the guild though at great cost to your own sanity. There are reasons why very few people want to lead groups, and it's fair. But watching a guild fall apart is going to be inevitable when no one is willing to keep things going.

[Roar-Powah]

Guilds with a younger a GM / Officers will have more issues with drama etc, I'm 34 and co-gm of my guild and let me tell you i don't take shit from anyone. Even when i was a Raid leader / Officer of a few different guilds i didn't take shit and kicked a few people.

Drama comes from all different places and not just women, saying it stems from women isn't fair, i will share a few of my own experiences since playing from Vanilla.

In WotLK, had a raider was still rocking a non heroic dungeon blue weapon, 2h weapon dropped off trash and it went to me as i was MT (i got the ok from the gm / officers) and this other raider didn't like and he made a massive fuss about it. I told him that he couldn't raid anymore until he geared him self a bit from heroic dungeons(Did he really think that we would carry him? and then come into the raids doing no dps and get all the loot.). Well he kicked up a stink and then the drama followed. Most of the guild took my side and the other around 10 people took his side, so i made a ticket to Blizzard and got the weapon sent to him and left the guild without saying a word. Well that guild failed pretty fast after i left since i was the MT / Raid Leader. ( It was partly my fault for not inspecting everyone's gear before raiding as well, it taught me a very good lesson as well)

More recently i was in a guild at the start of WoD (since my own guild was having a break this expansion) and we were doing very well, and all of sudden the guild got merged with another guild. I saw no reason why that guild should of been merged with another guild, we had the numbers and was just about to start mythic raiding as we had cleared all of Heroic HM. I left right away, guild mergers never work as there will always be conflict in the higher ranks. 3 months later that guild fell apart, gee not like i saw that coming and i told the GM that it would happen.

The lesson to learn, it's up to the Officers and the GM to stamp out toxic drama infused players very fast as this is the only way guilds survive.

[Deja Thoris]

Guilds with a younger a GM / Officers will have more issues with drama etc, I'm 34 and co-gm of my guild and let me tell you i don't take shit from anyone. Even when i was a Raid leader / Officer of a few different guilds i didn't take shit and kicked a few people.

Drama comes from all different places and not just women, saying it stems from women isn't fair, i will share a few of my own experiences since playing from Vanilla.

In WotLK, had a raider was still rocking a non heroic dungeon blue weapon, 2h weapon dropped off trash and it went to me as i was MT (i got the ok from the gm / officers) and this other raider didn't like and he made a massive fuss about it. I told him that he couldn't raid anymore until he geared him self a bit from heroic dungeons(Did he really think that we would carry him? and then come into the raids doing no dps and get all the loot.). Well he kicked up a stink and then the drama followed. Most of the guild took my side and the other around 10 people took his side, so i made a ticket to Blizzard and got the weapon sent to him and left the guild without saying a word. Well that guild failed pretty fast after i left since i was the MT / Raid Leader. ( It was partly my fault for not inspecting everyone's gear before raiding as well, it taught me a very good lesson as well)

More recently i was in a guild at the start of WoD (since my own guild was having a break this expansion) and we were doing very well, and all of sudden the guild got merged with another guild. I saw no reason why that guild should of been merged with another guild, we had the numbers and was just about to start mythic raiding as we had cleared all of Heroic HM. I left right away, guild mergers never work as there will always be conflict in the higher ranks. 3 months later that guild fell apart, gee not like i saw that coming and i told the GM that it would happen.

The lesson to learn, it's up to the Officers and the GM to stamp out toxic drama infused players very fast as this is the only way guilds survive.

You sound like you're full of shit to be honest. It's your way or the highway. Since you couldn't change it you left. Now that you're "co-GM" (what the fuck is co gm anyway) you just get to tell dissenters to fuck off.

The 2 examples you gave aren't management. It's some socially awkward nerd with no EQ avoiding problems.

[Bosen]

One single chick "destroyed your guild"? Sounds more like a bunch of chumps to me. It's amazing how guys manage to be the worst clowns possible and then when everything goes down the shitter, it's the chick who did it. Well how was she even able to? Happens in real life all the time.

Yes! It's a tale that's been told since there were the first two dudes and a chick,I'm sure.

[RoKPaNda]

As a woman: Bitches are crazy, and they make normally rational guys crazy too.
You don't know their situation, and assuming the worst just to defend m'lady's honor is pretty pathetic.

Nah. If the guys were rational at all the guild wouldn't have fallen apart due to the actions of the woman in question. It has nothing to do with defending her honor. Skanks skank and creepers creep, and the rest of us men and women sit back and get creeped out a little bit by both.

[Mustardisbad]

So back in wrath when I was like 13 or 14 years old, I was in a raiding guild. And my computer was complete garbage but I really wanted to see raids, so the co-gm would put me in the progression group. Well the GM (who was dating the co-gm) wasn't happy when I couldn't show up because load screens would take like 15 mins and after waiting for me to zone in the game would crash and I wouldn't get back on. This would blossom arguments between them about other things and eventually they broke up. The GM made a new guild and the co-gm quit wow or moved servers I don't really know, but it obviously killed the guild that had been together a long time. A couple months later the old GM quit or moved servers as well.

Btw the co-gm would always be defending me when they should have just kicked me because I couldn't raid and was wasting their time.

[Deleted]

I mean, I used to raid with my boyfriend back when he played and I wouldn't have even stood for letting him "defend my honour" or whatever. He also respected me enough to let me earn my raid spot on my own merit. Luckily for me, he was a very elitist player and would probably have been the first in line to criticise me if I fucked up. If the girl is a regular player, she's gonna have some pride in her own skills and earn her rewards like everybody else. I would rather just be straight up told if I'm underperforming, otherwise how am I supposed to improve.

There are gonna be people who want to be carried/boosted or coddled and this includes guys. But I guess girls are more obvious because there are less of us, so we stick out more if we're assholes? I dunno. I've seen very princessy behaviour from guy raiders and it never gets attributed to their gender. That only happens if it's a girl wanting special treatment.

As for a guild falling apart over 1 player? That can happen often, whether the player is male or female. But those guilds are clearly not very good to begin with, they didn't have a close knit solid community that could stand against 1 person being an asshole. So that sucks for them. But if 1 person is able to do that to a guild, the fault also lies with the other guild members and leadership for enabling it in the first place.