Why the outrage over paying for your half of the meal?

[Deleted]

lydia says her friends would describe her as “thoughtful, intellectually oriented, relaxed, and a bit quirky. I’m definitely unique.”

Red flags!!!!

[Jyggalag]

It's a free market. You generally offer to pay for the person you ask out as a courtesy because if you don't they might think you're a prick and date someone else.

Seriously, this is all you could say? I'm actually quite disappointed. What a terrible, non-argument. I don't remember ever going to a "free market" of any description, leaving with nothing, and deciding to pay anyway?? What a ridiculous notion. There was no agreement, formal or informal, on who would pay prior to the date. At the end of it, it's clear he didn't give a shit what the woman thought and practically insisted she date someone else.

You say that like pussy is rationed out by some government agency based on what you think is fair.

You say that like you live in a cave. It's 2017. Women are literally crying for equal rights and shoving it down people's throats everywhere you look yet, when it comes to paying for a meal, suddenly it's double standards. If you had any experience of Tinder at all, you would know that "pussy" these days is definitely not something in need of rationing. There's plenty to go around. In fact, it's the closest the dating world has ever been to "fair" as more and more women seem to be waking up to the fact that they aren't entitled to hand outs on a date just because they have a pussy. An increasingly relaxed stance on casual sex, and less demonizing of women who enjoy sex, coupled with the quick matching power of Tinder is making this possible. The guy in the OP knows it, and that's why doesn't care about you or your shitty double standards.

[Deleted]

Seriously, this is all you could say? I'm actually quite disappointed. What a terrible, non-argument. I don't remember ever going to a "free market" of any description, leaving with nothing, and deciding to pay anyway?? What a ridiculous notion. There was no agreement, formal or informal, on who would pay prior to the date. At the end of it, it's clear he didn't give a shit what the woman thought and practically insisted she date someone else.



You say that like you live in a cave. It's 2017. Women are literally crying for equal rights and shoving it down people's throats everywhere you look, yet when it comes to paying for a meal suddenly it's double standards. If you had any experience of Tinder at all, you would know that "pussy" these days is definitely not something in need of rationing. There's plenty to go around. In fact, it's the closest the dating world has ever been to "fair" as more and more women seem to be waking up to the fact that they aren't entitled to hand outs on a date just because they have a pussy. An increasingly relaxed stance on casual sex, and less demonizing of women who enjoy sex, coupled with the quick matching power of Tinder is making this possible. The guy in the OP knows it, and that's why doesn't care about you or your shitty double standards.

When you get invited somewhere, then you usually expect the other to pay, because it's an invitation. If this is not, then splitting the bill should be one of the first topics, to set things clear. Splitting the bill after the woman refuses to go to the guy's place is a clear reaction which shows that he is not interested in her as a person, but just wants to buy her to have sex, which he could get with a prostitute just fine and without all emotional hassle.

I let my partner invite me for some evenings, and I invite him in some other cases, which are roughly 50:50 shared and usually in the same spending range. We also share all major expenses like holiday travels or the home cinema equipment. This is what I understand by feminism and women's rights - to have same rights as a man and share the responsibilities (like payment of bills) if both are in the same situation (like both having a separate income from jobs). If the man is the only one with the income and the woman is the housewife looking for children, then the situation is completely different, of course, so he is responsible for paying the bills and she is responsible for sensible householding and care of children.

This is not about women's rights though, it's about the guy being a dick.

[Jyggalag]

When you get invited somewhere, then you usually expect the other to pay, because it's an invitation. If this is not, then splitting the bill should be one of the first topics, to set things clear. Splitting the bill after the woman refuses to go to the guy's place is a clear reaction which shows that he is not interested in her as a person

The poll options are -
He should have paid - it's tradition
He should have paid - she travelled a long way to meet him
They should have split the bill - it's 2017

It's a "how should we look at feminism & equal rights for the sexes in the dating world" topic, not "Should the host of a date / person who sent the invitation pay the whole bill", in which case, you'd be absolutely correct, and something I've already explained in an earlier post.

This is not about women's rights though, it's about the guy being a dick.

No. The OP and the opinion poll are asking whether the woman should have got a free meal for showing up, because "traditions". There is no question about whether or not he was a dick. Of course he was. What people in this thread can't seem to grasp is that he's perfectly within his right to be one, as does the woman have the right to be annoyed about it, but not for the reasons in the opinion poll. In the sense of equal rights for sexes, she's wrong to even suggest let alone expect he should have paid for any reason other than he sent the invitation, making him the host of the date, and that paying would have made him out to be a decent human being.

[Mormolyce]

It's 2017. Women are literally crying for equal rights and shoving it down people's throats everywhere you look

Um, you seem to be thinking of the 1960s.

[Jyggalag]

Um, you seem to be thinking of the 1960s.

Good one! Another great, non-argument from yourself. Glad you realise that my points can't be argued with. Sorry to see you felt you had to resort to such a poor attempt at trolling.

[Deleted]

I personally wouldve paid... but im from an older generation

[Sierra85]

feminists want the door held open for them and for you to pay for their dinner bill, but if u suggest for a second something that is not "PC" then you are labeled a sexist misogynistic pig

[Deleted]

feminists want the door held open for them and for you to pay for their dinner bill, but if u suggest for a second something that is not "PC" then you are labeled a sexist misogynistic pig

Agreed.

Its funny how on the one hand women (mainly Feminists) demand to be treated as equals and yet in the same breath they will also demand that men give them traditional preferential treatment... double standards much?

[Tennis]

Red flags!!!!

What's so wrong with this? I would describe myself as unique also.

[Mormolyce]

Good one! Another great, non-argument from yourself. Glad you realise that my points can't be argued with. Sorry to see you felt you had to resort to such a poor attempt at trolling.

If you make any points I'll be sure to address them!

[Zantos]

I have reason to believe she is lying. First of all, just because he offered to bring her back to his place to check out his bourbon collection, that Doesn't mean he wanted to sleep with her. For someone who was self described as "intelligent", she should have known that.

Second, she shouldn't expect him to pay for her drinks. He didn't on the first date, why would he this time? The pattern had already been established day 1. You pay your own tabs.

She comes off as very presumptuous and self entitled. She should expect to split the bill. Its also funny that he was called the "immature jerk". He isn't the one blasting her on a public newspaper site.

She shouldn't have expected anything from him and should have expected to split it. She is entitled. Nothing more.

[Ghostpanther]

I was reading this in the newspaper and it doesn't add up.



https://www.thestar.com/life/2017/03...an-agenda.html

Seems ridiculous that in 2017 she expects that he should pay for it all. This is quite perplexing.
Also this dating ordeal sounds really exhausting. Must suck to be dating for years and years and not be able to get married and gain stability and committment.

He asked her for a date? But her first clue should have been when she found out he had already ordered and finished his coffee before she got there. Would instantly tell me he is a selfish jerk who is only interested in some cheap lay. Which a lot of the guys esp are on those dating apps just for that reason.

[kneehidude]

When you get invited somewhere, then you usually expect the other to pay, because it's an invitation.

I cannot and will not ever get behind this notion and I wish others would too. For crying out loud, you are an adult, you should bring money to pay for yourself whenever you decide to go out somewhere. If you cannot afford to go out then don't go. Now if they invite you and say they'll treat you, then by all means, expect them to pay.

[Jyggalag]

If you make any points I'll be sure to address them!

Since I've made plenty it's as plain as day that you're not even intelligent enough to comprehend them let alone address them. If only MMO-C had some sort of blue badge equivalent so that people would know when it's pointless applying logic or reasoning to a debate when the other party is disabled.

[Splenda]

This is how I see it as well. The person who invites, should offer to pay. If she suggested the next date, then she can offer to pay.

This is how I see it. The asker should expect to pay, even if I myself would offer to split, or pay for the drinks or the cab ride or w/e. With this said, ladies should do the asking more often.

[haxartus]

What's so wrong with this? I would describe myself as unique also.

Everyone will. Almost nobody is. Literally.