Would you consider an open relationship?

[Freighter]

I think the logic is that the spectrum of women that most men would "accept" for casual one-night-stands is wider than vice versa. So most men would have a hard time with propositions like that, but there'd be a smaller concentration of very attractive/socially adept men that would be getting all the successful offers. While for women, most women would be successful, rather than all the success being concentrated among a small group of the most attractive ones.

There'd be partners for everyone, just that the amount of sex would be very "unfairly" divided among men and not so among women.

I don't know if that's true, but some statistics would sexual partners could seem to suggest it. Anyways, that's the logic I think.

That's really because of the men being willing to have sex with anything if it's anything remotely close to alive.

[undeadmoon]

I feel emotional attachments through sex and therefore for me, I don't want to have sex with people I don't feel a certain level of attachment to, and I like the two vs the rest of the world feeling of a monogamous relationship, so I voted no.

People other than my partner are free to do whatever with whomever, but I like my partners to feel the same sense of exclusivity that I do when it comes to sex.

[Deleted]

I am saying that in order for woman to have sex with man, a man would seem like a requirement. How do you count it when woman and man have sex? 2 sex points for woman, and 1 for the man, or what? If all men have it so very difficult to find sex, then how are the women finding anyone either?

There are tons of women and only a few alpha men. The rest of men sit in the corner, watching, masturbating. Every woman gets to have sex, not every man does.

[Revi]

That's really because of the men being willing to have sex with anything if it's anything remotely close to alive.

That's the idea, yeah.

[Freighter]

There are tons of women and only a few alpha men. The rest of men sits in the corner, watching, masturbating. Every woman gets to have sex, not every man does.

There is no alpha in humans. If you don't get to have sex then it is because you have too high standards or there's something else you're doing wrong.

[Mehrunes]

Let's assume it's correct for a moment. Now what? The man she initiates sex with had very difficult time finding sex by exactly what reasoning? He didn't even need to do anything for it. That is very difficult?

1. Women initiate less often than men. 2. She doesn't really need to initiate in the first place. Just let do social norms do the work, have men approach her and choose the one she sees as acceptable. 3. If they're both just looking for sex, chances are the woman is going to be successful pretty quickly. A man, not necessarily so. So even if he eventually gets approached by the woman that feels like initiating, he could have already unsuccessfully initiated with other women in that day prior to it happening.

Also, in regards to your earlier points, they rest on the assumption that there is an equal amount of men and women seeking sex alone. As well as that women having sex more easily than men has to mean that there is no difference in difficulty because if women have sex with men, then it evens out. The assumption being that there's an equal distribution of men and women that have sex easily across the board. But it can very well be that there's a smaller group of more successful men get to have sex easily with a larger amount of women. So while there'd be so men that have it easier, maybe as easy as women even, it wouldn't be the case for men on average. Of course it can go the other way around, but given how women tend to be more picky, I wouldn't count on that.

[Dug]

I'm sure plenty of average decent looking dudes who don't score a lot could have lots of sex with unattractive women... but hey "no fatties", "dog face" etc.

[Zuben]

The concept intrigues me, but I don't see it working for myself.

[Azadina]

I think the logic is that the spectrum of women that most men would "accept" for casual one-night-stands is wider than vice versa. So most men would have a hard time with propositions like that, but there'd be a smaller concentration of very attractive/socially adept men that would be getting all the successful offers. While for women, most women would be successful, rather than all the success being concentrated among a small group of the most attractive ones.

There'd be partners for everyone, just that the amount of sex would be very "unfairly" divided among men and not so among women.

I don't know if that's true, but some statistics would sexual partners could seem to suggest it. Anyways, that's the logic I think.

There's a big flaw here with that. Those attractive and socially adept men are not going to go for below average females, when they have no need to. So you'll have to explain how the bottom 50% of women can be successful, if that narrow group of men gets it all, but won't touch the other half.

[Revi]

There's a big flaw here with that. Those attractive and socially adept men are not going to go for below average females, when they have no need to. So you'll have to explain how the bottom 50% of women can be successful, if that narrow group of men gets it all, but won't touch the other half.

Alcohol? I dunno..

No but seriously, I think it's a fair assumption that men are less picky when it comes to sexual partners than women. So women sleep mostly with equal and above, while men will bang in all directions of the social ladder.

[Deleted]

Maybe? What if the guy looks like Zack Efron and she's the female equivalent of danny devito? Anyways, I was just saying making it a contest is retarded and doing that of course would set up an open relationship to fail.

And I would say being in an "open relationship" is retarded.

[Mehrunes]

I think the logic is that the spectrum of women that most men would "accept" for casual one-night-stands is wider than vice versa. So most men would have a hard time with propositions like that, but there'd be a smaller concentration of very attractive/socially adept men that would be getting all the successful offers. While for women, most women would be successful, rather than all the success being concentrated among a small group of the most attractive ones.

There'd be partners for everyone, just that the amount of sex would be very "unfairly" divided among men and not so among women.

I don't know if that's true, but some statistics of sexual partners could seem to suggest it. Anyways, that's the logic I think.

I saw some graphs from one of the bigger online dating sites that showed how women tend to rank most men as below average, while men have a more normal distribution or something along those lines (the numbers about initiating contact were similarly skewed, if not worse). And that's for dating. I'd lean towards steeper standards (well, at least before including alcohol) for ONS.

[Dug]

And I would say being in an "open relationship" is retarded.

Not something you need to worry about anytime soon I'm sure.

[Deleted]

You're viewed as a whore if you do that. So how is there no fearing negative consequences?

Ok, fair point. But I was talking about something like going to jail for harassment or getting maced or stabbed in the face. I'd take being called a slut over that. Hell, if I was a girl, I would be a slut so hard I would be putting all the other sluts that came before me to shame. But I wouldn't try and get a guy to provide for me and convince him to allow me to bang other guys. I'd just be honest and either commit or not, if I was unable to do that.

[Mehrunes]

Not into it myself. I'm not a jealous person but I don't see the point. My husband and I have a friend who is married and he brought home a girlfriend like she was a puppy or something. They all get along and he got the girlfriend pregnant with twins. They all take turns taking care of the kids and are one big happy family. If it works for them, great but I don't get it. What's in it for the girlfriend? She's not married, has twins with someone else's husband, by law she can never legally be part of this family, she can receive no benefits if something were to happen to him. What are family get togethers like? "I want to introduce you to my boyfriend and baby daddy and his wife?' "This is my husband and our girlfriend whose the mother of our twins?" At first I thought it was a surrogacy but then he said they were happily in a polyamorous relationship. I had more questions than I had comfort with personally but like I said, it works for them, more power to them I suppose.

Saw something very similar on 9GAG today oO

[Dread Pirate Phayde]

Not for me, I'm with someone to be with them. If people can make it work, more power to them, though I've seen a few try and fall apart, so obviously it's got to involve the right mindset.

[Perryn]

Been in one. It could work with the right partner, I guess, but that takes a -lot- of trust, faith, responsibility and compassion on all parties' side, over a long time whether you're having a bad day/period in your life or not. Much easier said than done.

[Freighter]

Ok, fair point. But I was talking about something like going to jail for harassment or getting maced or stabbed in the face. I'd take being called a slut over that. Hell, if I was a girl, I would be a slut so hard I would be putting all the other sluts that came before me to shame. But I wouldn't try and get a guy to provide for me and convince him to allow me to bang other guys. I'd just be honest and either commit or not, if I was unable to do that.

I doubt you would if you were a girl. You'd likely be more concerned about your own safety than wanting to fuck everyone.

[Azadina]

There are tons of women and only a few alpha men. The rest of men sit in the corner, watching, masturbating. Every woman gets to have sex, not every man does.

I doubt it's quite as simple, for say overweight women. (which is becoming a problem rapidly for both men and women these days) Or ones that don't look good on average. They are not going to get picked up by good looking men. So what about the rest of the men you say are sitting in the corner? They have a chance now, but do they take it, or keep sitting in the corner?

I doubt you would if you were a girl. You'd likely be more concerned about your own safety than wanting to fuck everyone.

Indeed ^^

[Mehrunes]

There's a big flaw here with that. Those attractive and socially adept men are not going to go for below average females, when they have no need to. So you'll have to explain how the bottom 50% of women can be successful, if that narrow group of men gets it all, but won't touch the other half.

The flaw being that you once again assume there's an equal distribution of men and women seeking just sex. Or with equal frequency. Then there's alcohol (though that works both ways).