The most lurid corner of the Internet

[Tennis]

The most lurid corner of the Internet is not a new dating app or a fetish site. It’s not an alt-right forum or a bitcoin marketplace, nor is it some channel of the deep Web where novel, illicit substances are heavily trafficked. It is the life-style site Refinery29’s Money Diaries, a column in which anonymous young professional women document every penny they earn and spend in a week—on Uber rides, lattes, birthday gifts, impulse-buy candy bars at the Walgreens register. Like I said: thrilling stuff.

Money Diaries launched in January of 2016, premised on the idea that “the first step to getting your financial life in order is tracking what you spend.” By encouraging young women to record their expenditures, and to discuss their finances frankly, Refinery29 could, the theory goes, help young women become savvier about money. The first woman to brave the experiment was a twenty-seven-year-old Brooklynite making sixty-five thousand dollars a year in an undisclosed “creative industry.” Her entry was candid and funny: she ordered buffalo wings and a large pizza for herself late at night ($28.74); bought beauty products online, to compensate for being unhappy at work ($59); ordered a copy of a novel on Amazon ($10.66); and dabbled in cocaine (free). “I don’t know how much drugs are supposed to cost, but I heard coke is pricey,” she wrote. “I just did a line because it was offered, and I was drunk. The alcohol was free, too.”

In the world of the Money Diaries, she quickly learned, no amount of honesty goes unpunished. In the comments section, Refinery29 readers quickly established themselves as financial, and moral, adjudicators. “I live and work in chealsea [sic] and I wouldn’t dare waste like this,” one wrote, with palpable condescension. “Esp on that salary. Try reevaluating doll .” Another took issue with her literary splurge: “Pro tip. Go to the library for books. That one was decent but not worth a buy!” A third found her health regimen insufficient: “Yum, a diet of pizza, pastries, alcohol and buffalo wings (and a lil cocaine) with no time spent exercising . . . no wonder this young woman seems exhausted and unmotivated.” A commenter identifying herself as the diarist eventually waded into the comments to defend herself, or at least her recreational drug use. She’d grown up incredibly sheltered, she wrote, and had been compensating in adulthood, hence the cocaine (which, by the way, she’s only tried three times).

Thus Money Diaries was established as a place where millennial women stand before their peers to await harsh judgment. To be fair, there are plenty of genuinely absurd details in the diarists’ spending habits. One woman making two hundred and forty thousand dollars a year as an attorney described getting a bikini wax as a way to “wake up”; another making a hundred and eight thousand dollars a year in the oil industry shells out a hundred and forty-five dollars to groom her dog. But it’s often the most mundane entries that garner the most heated criticism. One woman who makes a hundred and twenty thousand dollars a year in media noted that her boyfriend picked up the bill for several outings. “50’s AF,” one commenter wrote. Women who pay for their boyfriends, such as a tech-industry worker with a salary of a hundred and forty-five thousand dollars (plus a thirty-thousand-dollar bonus), are equally scolded. “WHYYYY WOULD YOU EVER LET THE BOYFRIEND GET OFF RENT-FREE BEFORE YOU ARE MARRIED? . . . Women be trippin!” A Fordham student had virtually no income, and mostly subsisted on contributions from her parents. Naturally, this enraged the commenters—but so did plenty else about her spending habits. “Damn she eats carbs every meal,” one wrote.

Read enough of these entries and their related comments, which often run into the hundreds, and an unspoken code becomes apparent. Money Diaries initially featured mainly affluent women from cities such as New York and Los Angeles, but it soon began sprinkling in entries from women earning less, and in smaller towns and cities. A woman who makes six figures is treated more harshly than a woman who earns less—unless it’s too much less, in which case she is suspected to be a freeloader. (“Glad you’re making it on $32k in the city but it doesn’t quite add up,” one commenter wrote to a twenty-four-year-old writer.) Entries from people who live in New York receive the most scrutiny, as do those from women working in finance and tech. Women in stable relationships are treated more harshly, while women from small or rural towns are revered, particularly if they live modestly and get to bed early.

The kindest comments I’ve seen were in response to a woman living in Juneau, Alaska, who raises her own chickens, cans her own vegetables, and, during her weeklong period of journaling, walked to pick up takeout during a blizzard. “I would love to hear more like this!” one commenter replied. “Best diary yet!” another gushed. If the series is to be believed, we would like young women not merely to get their financial lives in order but to enter an enlightened state of ascetic living. Meanwhile, the diarists themselves, whether affluent and urban or not, add caveats and justifications for any irrational-seeming purchases, as if to beg the commenters in advance for forgiveness. The woman who ordered takeout emphasizes that she didn’t waste the leftovers. The waxed lawyer insists that she spends four hundred to five hundred dollars a month on charity, and “more toward the end of the year.”

This might all seem like an ongoing experiment in stereotypical female cruelty, demonstrating how harshly women judge each other, and underscoring the complex tangle of Schadenfreude and resentment with which women sometimes regard one another’s careers. Or it might seem like just another batshit comments section. Money Diaries is careful to include women with large student-loan bills to pay down and parents’ mortgages to contribute to, but the column still seems to exist largely in a comfortable urban bubble. It’s easy to treat young people’s financial decisions as entertainment when they’re still on their parents’ cell-phone plans. And yet it seems, to me, that there are real anxieties detectable in these diaries and comments, ones that are specific to a young female demographic. Millennial women have experienced a minor cultural revolution and a major economic panic within their young life spans. We’re now, in theory, encouraged to dress how we please, sleep with whomever we want, choose to have children or not, wear makeup or go barefaced, demand raises and take maternity leave, and speak out about sexual harassment and assault. At the same time, we are products of the Great Recession, instilled with deep-seated financial panic and also acutely attuned to notions of privilege. Money—the “last taboo facing modern working women,” as Refinery29 puts it, and a locus of profound pressure and anxiety—may be the last arena in which we’re allowed to judge one another openly.

https://www.newyorker.com/culture/ra...pending-habits

Came across this. Do you agree that this is the most lurid corner of the internet? I didn't even know something like this existed.

[Kaleredar]

So it's reality TV in the form of a blog...?



yawn.

[doot]

It sounds like judgemental accounting porn with a side of vapid, but I don't think it would be anymore lurid than any other site that engages in anything that can be viewed as slightly competitive.

[chazus]

I don't think that word means what they think it means. It is neither criminal, sexual, shocking, or sensational.

It's basically My Fitness Pal for your wallet.

[Radaney]

The only lurid part of the article is calling the contents lurid.

[Independent voter]

It's not lurid


lu·rid
ˈlo͝orəd/Submit
adjective
very vivid in color, especially so as to create an unpleasantly harsh or unnatural effect.
"lurid food colorings"
synonyms: bright, brilliant, vivid, glaring, shocking, fluorescent, flaming, dazzling, intense; More
(of a description) presented in vividly shocking or sensational terms, especially giving explicit details of crimes or sexual matters.

(Radaney beat me to it, nm)

[yetgdhfgh]

Just browse the dark web for a while then you will find yourself in the lurid corner of the internet.

When you can browse for illegal drugs, illegal Pornography, Hitmen, Fake Passports, illegal weapons,bombs and slaves like its ebay then you know you have found the lurid corner of the internet!

[Tennis]

Just browse the dark web for a while then you will find yourself in the lurid corner of the internet.

When you can browse for illegal drugs, illegal Pornography, Hitmen, Fake Passports, illegal weapons,bombs and slaves like its ebay then you know you have found the lurid corner of the internet!

How do you know this? Are you on the dark web?

[yetgdhfgh]

How do you know this? Are you on the dark web?

I used to browse the silk road back in the day just to see the sheer nerve of if all and it was stunning! The feds took that site down and iam glad i never bought any pills from it cause i felt at the time you dont know if that guy who is selling isnt a DEA setup!

I know of a few other sites but i doubt they are still operating now but if you look hard enough you will find it on the dark web!

[-aiko-]

Aww, how disappointing. I was drawn in by the word lurid but this is anything but.

[yetgdhfgh]

Aww, how disappointing. I was drawn in by the word lurid but this is anything but.

When iam a few clicks away from a video of some guy with his face peeled off and being mutilated with a box cutter i doubt anything can be now called lurid!

[the game]

How do you know this? Are you on the dark web?

It's not illegal to use the dark/deep web

[yetgdhfgh]

It's not illegal to use the dark/deep web

Its only illegal if you use it to view illegal child pornography.

Buying stuff from it is a different matter but i just advise not to do it cause you will most likely be ripped off, given counterfeit shit or have a visit from a federal agent or interpol!!

[Independent voter]

taw·dry
ˈtôdrē/Submit
adjective
1.
showy but cheap and of poor quality.
"tawdry jewelry"
synonyms: gaudy, flashy, showy, garish, loud; More
nounarchaic
1.
cheap and gaudy finery.

"The most tawdry corner of the Internet"

[Al Gorefiend]

Its only illegal if you use it to view illegal child pornography.

Buying stuff from it is a different matter but i just advise not to do it cause you will most likely be ripped off, given counterfeit shit or have a visit from a federal agent or interpol!!

Nah it's all illegal. It wouldn't be hidden from accessible domains if it wasn't.

[yetgdhfgh]

Nah it's all illegal. It wouldn't be hidden from accessible domains if it wasn't.

Its not illegal to look at it unless its kiddie porn.

Unless you live in one of those totalitarian countries and that was the reason TOR was invented so dissidents could communicate without fear of being sent to a gulag!

[the game]

Its only illegal if you use it to view illegal child pornography.

Buying stuff from it is a different matter but i just advise not to do it cause you will most likely be ripped off, given counterfeit shit or have a visit from a federal agent or interpol!!

it's the porn that's illegal. not the deep/dark web itself. Like with alot of things it matters what you were doing on it more than the fact you are on it. I haven't personally been to the deep/dark web because of some of the stories I've heard of some of the more depraved shit.

[draynay]

Do you agree that this is the most lurid corner of the internet?

No .

[StayTuned]

...rabble brabble as per usual...

Came across this. Do you agree that this is the most lurid corner of the internet? I didn't even know something like this existed.

No, I do not agree.

[Strawberry]

How do you know this? Are you on the dark web?

I was, for quite a while. Saw all kind of nasty shit. But I'm into gore so I love stuff like that. Honestly you don't really need to go to dark web to find gore. It's mostly for hackers, junkies and pedos.