S.O.S (there is that girl....)

[Deleted]

I got to know her 2 years ago and ever since I've realised I've been falling in love with her.Sounds silly for a guy to make such a thread ,but I have absolutely no idea as what to do and can't think clearly myself.Some info:we usually speak a lot,smiling,talkin' about various topics every day and stuff,and some more classmates(talking about uni anyway) have felt that between me and her there is something that's been building up day after day.Also,could be a coincidence,but she broke up at the point where we started getting a tad closer emotionally to each other and didn't seem too bother thaaaat much about it......Any friendly tips ?

[Ichimarunico]

Don't go there. Good way to kill a friendship.

[Deleted]

Yes,I agree but can't ignore what I feel..Hell,some months now it feels I'm going to melt when I see her(oh boy I sound so silly)

[Corysi]

Don't go there. Good way to kill a friendship.

Don't come up with reasons why a girl shouldn't be with you, they'll come up with plenty on their own. Go for it. Better to find out you've met your future wife and mother of your kids than spend your entire life wondering what could have happened.

[Davisdoesdallas]

My tip is www.laddertheory.com


Either you try something and you lose the friendship (if you manage in the first place to leave the 'friend zone') or you stay permanently in the 'friend zone'

Simple as that truly.

[Deleted]

Don't come up with reasons why a girl shouldn't be with you, they'll come up with plenty on their own. Go for it. Better to find out you've met your future wife and mother of your kids than spend your entire life wondering what could have happened.

that's how I think of it but hell I don;t have such confidence and Im afraid of being rejected...now if i never take that step Ill be just wondering...

[Gaexion Ramza Beoulve]

My advice to you is to get some while the gettin' is good.

[Lilcheeks]

More or less I'll agree with what people have said so far, but I'll sum it up like this... make up your mind on how you want things and then act on your decision. Don't keep yourself in limbo agonizing over things one way or another. Realize that there will be consequences if things don't work out, but its not the end of the world.

[Deleted]

More or less I'll agree with what people have said so far, but I'll sum it up like this... make up your mind on how you want things and then act on your decision. Don't keep yourself in limbo agonizing over things one way or another. Realize that there will be consequences if things don't work out, but its not the end of the world.

Im generally a really shy and low confident guy ,henche why I dont want to even think of getting humiliated.But I guess,you are right.

[Corysi]

That worst that happens is you lose a good friend. The best that happens is you have your best friend for live, a woman who will love you, family, kids, etc, etc. Friends are replaceable. You said you're in college? How many friends have you had since preschool? How many of those friends are still are you friends? Realistically even if you DON'T do anything and just stay friends with her, you'll end up in different fields of work, at different locations, in different states and "try really hard" to stay in touch for the first year and then let it all fall to the side as you both move on with your lives.

[Deleted]

I haven't read any of the other comments, but you're gonna regret more if you don't do anything about it than if you go for it and get rejected. You should really try to ease her into it, by talking to her about you starting to get feelings for her and then proposing you go on an actual date like a dinner/movie and just talk and see if it feels right. If she feels the same way like you do you'll know by then and if she doesn't, it hopefully wont get weird. But being friendzoned is about the worst feeling there is. Pls tell me how it goes

[Calzaeth]

Talk with her. Explain that you feel there may be something, and ask if she is willing to TRY, and that you won't pressure her in any way. Take baby steps, and soort of ease both you into the relationship. If you at ANY point realize that "I love this girl, but a relationship won't work", then talk to her and explain why you feel that way.

1. COMMUNICATION!
2. Baby steps
3. No matter what happens, make sure that the friendship can survive it.

The whole thing about a failed relationship ruining a friendship is simple and pure bullshit. Of course, if the relationship crashes because you act like an asshole, then kiss the friendship bye-bye.

Good luck =)

[Deleted]

I haven't read any of the other comments, but you're gonna regret more if you don't do anything about it than if you go for it and get rejected. You should really try to ease her into it, by talking to her about you starting to get feelings for her and then proposing you go on an actual date like a dinner/movie and just talk and see if it feels right. If she feels the same way like you do you'll know by then and if she doesn't, it hopefully wont get weird. But being friendzoned is about the worst feeling there is. Pls tell me how it goes

Just wanna mention I suffer from depression and that makes my self etseem even worse!

[Knight Gil]

I got to know her 2 years ago and ever since I've realised I've been falling in love with her.Sounds silly for a guy to make such a thread ,but I have absolutely no idea as what to do and can't think clearly myself.Some info:we usually speak a lot,smiling,talkin' about various topics every day and stuff,and some more classmates(talking about uni anyway) have felt that between me and her there is something that's been building up day after day.Also,could be a coincidence,but she broke up at the point where we started getting a tad closer emotionally to each other and didn't seem too bother thaaaat much about it......Any friendly tips ?

Everything is going great.

Why the hell do you want tips if you're doing good?

Don't go there. Good way to kill a friendship.

Bullshit.

Yes,I agree

Then you're silly.

[Deleted]

Just wanna mention I suffer from depression and that makes my self etseem even worse!

Sorry that was really not my intention! But you shouldn't worry about it to much. The important part is that you talk with her and take it slowly.

[Deleted]

Everything is going great.

Why the hell do you want tips if you're doing good?



Bullshit.



Then you're silly.

how is it going great?this is just the usual friendship,which Im not interested in :S

[Knight Gil]

how is it going great?this is just the usual friendship,which Im not interested in :S

and some more classmates(talking about uni anyway) have felt that between me and her there is something that's been building up day after day.

You said this before. What if you're just pessimistic? You said you have poor self-esteem. Yet your classmates have "felt" that. How about that?

[Deleted]

Fuck the friendship, plenty more people to be friends with, if it all goes wrong you'll make new friends.

Go get some.

[Deleted]

If you want something to happen you need to make a move. This doesn't mean that you have to go and tell her "ohhh I love you so much", but step by step you need to be showing your intentions and increase physical contact.

If you want to move into a relationship status, you need to behave like that. Many guys get "friendzoned" because they never show their intentions and they don't try any physical approach. They behave like friends and they become friends.

It's much simpler than it seems, but it's not easy. You may lose, you may be rejected, but you know what? Rejection only hurts temporary. You soon forget about it and become much stronger because at least you tried. Keep this in mind for anything you do in life.

Good luck.

[Deleted]

If all fails

'It is better to have loved and to have lost, than to have never loved atall.

Go get her.