Wasting Time - Where do I draw the line?

[yocuri]

When I say wasting time, I don't just mean spending hours on World of Warcraft. (There's other games he likes to spend time with too. I'm seriously worried that Hearthstone is going to consume him completely -- he got the beta.)

Besides just games, my boyfriend is constantly glued to this site (after years of over-extending his cell phone data limits and making his parents pay a fee, his mother if finally getting him the 3 Gigabyte data plan -- just to strain how much he is on this site and others); patch-updates I understand because he's been playing the game for years and wants to keep up with the latest upbringings of the game, but when he's spending his time browsing through the Off-Topic stuff, that bothers me. (Is what you guys talk about really that important?) In addition to this, he's constantly got some YouTuber blaring in his ears. He'll spend a good chunk of time browsing through Facebook even though he only cares about ten out of four-hundred some-odd people's statuses he goes through. Not to mention the image browsing websites -- the never-ending portal through time wasting. It's like he's hyper-tuned to this inhibiting form of reality and getting outside and accomplishing anything is completely surreal.

My question is - For a young adult who needs to press forward with life, how much time is too much to spend doing society's idea of "nothing"?

[Airwaves]

Sounds like a normal young adult to me.

There is no point coming here to whine about it. Talk to him. Not to random Internet people.

[vizzle]

Don't blame us if your boyfriend is a loser, alright.

[Powerogue]

What would you rather him be doing? Mention that to him.

[Airwaves]

Don't blame us if your boyfriend is a loser, alright.

Or she is boring.

[vizzle]

Or she is boring.

My ex was like this girl's bf. Not a care in the world. It does get irritating.*Shrug*

[TEHPALLYTANK]

What can I say, we're a fun bunch.

[yocuri]

Oh, you all avoid the question though. Is there any sense of appropriate time-frame that I should be considering?

[This name sucks]

Plot twist: The boyfriend is Jaylock.

[vizzle]

Oh, you all avoid the question though. Is there any sense of appropriate time-frame that I should be considering?

Does he do everything that is required of him (work/school)? If so, how much? Bare minimum, or does he strive to do more? Or does he come home and sit on the computer 8+hours a day being unproductive? Or does he do both?

[Deleted]

Why is this person sitting on a mobile connection? Buy him fiber for God's sake!
Letting the poor fuck sit on a mobile connection.. what has this world come to?

[This name sucks]

Why is this person sitting on a mobile connection? Buy him fiber for God's sake!
Letting the poor fuck sit on a mobile connection.. what has this world come to?

He's right.

In a way; this is kind of your fault.

[Airwaves]

Why is this person sitting on a mobile connection? Buy him fiber for God's sake!
Letting the poor fuck sit on a mobile connection.. what has this world come to?

OI! I still have to use dam copper wire in Australia!

And what makes it worse it people keep fucking digging it up to sell the copper.

[starkey]

So is the Op the girlfriend or the mother im confused

[vizzle]

So is the Op the girlfriend or the mother im confused

Why are they mutually exclusive? You need to be more progressive than this

[MrKnubbles]

You need to provide a more entertaining alternative to him. It sounds like he's very comfortable just doing what he does now. You can't just tell someone to do something different. You need to take him and show him to a good time. Show him that it's fun to go out and do other things once in a while. Now, he's not going to drop all of this just because you guys went out once. But it will help to show him that there are other alternatives out there (which involve you) that are also fun.

[Deleted]

Oh, you all avoid the question though. Is there any sense of appropriate time-frame that I should be considering?

Let him do what he wants. If you don't like it, leave him.

[Airwaves]

Let him do what he wants. If you don't like it, leave him.

Pretty much all there is to it.

[vizzle]

You need to provide a more entertaining alternative to him. It sounds like he's very comfortable just doing what he does now. You can't just tell someone to do something different. You need to take him and show him to a good time. Show him that it's fun to go out and do other things once in a while. Now, he's not going to drop all of this just because you guys went out once. But it will help to show him that there are other alternatives out there (which involve you) that are also fun.

To be serious for a moment, I think it's fair if the girlfriend wants a guy who's more serious with his life than some people (including this boyfriend) might be. She might be thinking about being with him long-term and you wouldn't want a guy who's not thinking about his future.

In that case, either really she has to talk to him to see if he'll get his shit together (assuming he does not have his shit together), and if the result of that discussion does not pan out in the way she likes, she either accepts it or leaves him.

Anyway, I can't decide which is funnier about this thread. That most of the posts aren't taking it seriously which ultimately shows the girlfriend how silly this forum that her boyfriend is addicted to really is, or that the boyfriend will see this and realize it's him.

[Tojara]

Free time is free time. Doesn't matter if it's outside messing with a garden, playing sports, sitting on the couch watching TV/movies or well, on the internet playing games.

It's really only disruptive IMO if it actively interferes with things you need to do in order to be productive in life. What that is depends on what stage of life you're on, but typically work, school and family.

Some people are perfectly content with achieving a certain amount of success and not really worrying about going forward. You probably won't make much money or live what is seen by society as a lavish lifestyle, but if you're just concerned with what is a relatively cheap hobby and nothing else.. well you can easily spend most of your life doing it.

The question is more or less what stage of his life is he at and what you expect out of your life. You might just be complete opposites and completely incompatible people in the long term. I honestly think there is nothing wrong with that lifestyle, as long as that person can support themselves with it. Maybe you aren't that interesting, or he's just not interested in you. Or perhaps that's just what he's always going to be lol.