Sex on the First Date?

[Zyky]

Except this isn't a problem. A "meaningful relationship" is only as valuable as those involved make it. IE, if the people involved aren't interested in a meaningful relationship, then such a relationship with those people has no value. Sex is natural. Monogamy isn't.

Except it is a problem. There was no way for people to act this way 20+ years ago, there were far less people wanting one night stands, there was no such thing as catfishing, before you had a very small pool of choices, and it was generally who was where, and a lot of people talked. Now its "oh I wanna smash -swipe right-" with absolutely no connection, no work, no effort. And people wonder why society is getting lazy.

[pateuvasiliu]

I am not sure what part of "getting to know someone" better went over your head, but that would include exchanging medical test results for STDs before sex.

Sounds romantic af.

[Fencers]

Do what you feel. Sex is sex. It's supposed to feel good.

[Mistame]

Except it is a problem. There was no way for people to act this way 20+ years ago, there were far less people wanting one night stands, there was no such thing as catfishing, before you had a very small pool of choices, and it was generally who was where, and a lot of people talked. Now its "oh I wanna smash -swipe right-" with absolutely no connection, no work, no effort. And people wonder why society is getting lazy.

Ok, so it's a problem for you. But the only relevant opinions are those of the ones involved. So unless you see a problem with you doing it, there is no problem.

[Freighter]

Sorry, but that's not how that works. "Racist" implies prejudice or discrimination of a particular race, in its entirety; not a subset. Being "submissive" is a cultural trait, not a racial trait. There is nothing negative or discriminatory about being "submissive". It's also important to note that stereotypes, by there very nature, are typically born of ignorance and there's no such thing as "involuntary racism".

We're not submissive though, it's not a cultural trait either. They assume we are, based on racial stereotyping.

[Celista]

Sounds romantic af.

Your medical health isn't supposed to be "romantic af". People lie about not having STDs all the time.

- - - Updated - - -

We're not submissive though, it's not a cultural trait either. They assume we are, based on racial stereotyping.

I think it's hilarious misconception because guys who are into Asian women have no idea what they're getting. Hahaha.

[meheez]

But damn, casual sex is so boring. Where is romance? Where is suffering? Where is hard work? Where are standards?

[pateuvasiliu]

Your medical health isn't supposed to be "romantic af". People lie about not having STDs all the time.

So how do you do it, is it something you pull out at the 1st date? Second? Right before you bang?

[Zyky]

Ok, so it's a problem for you. But the only relevant opinions are those of the ones involved. So unless you see a problem with you doing it, there is no problem.

Its a problem for society not for me. You refuse to pick up on the obvious, so I'm done conversing with you.

[BuckSparkles]

But damn, casual sex is so boring. Where is romance? Where is suffering? Where is hard work? Where are standards?

They died with the ADD generation

[Deleted]

At the end of the day, I guess it's up to everyone to decide themselves if it's acceptable for them or not.

Would I do it? No, absolutely not. For me, personally, sex belongs into a committed relationship.

[Mistame]

We're not submissive though, it's not a cultural trait either. They assume we are, based on racial stereotyping.

Nope. They assume you are because of a cultural stereotype. That you can't distinguish this difference; or that you misuse "racist", is on you. /shrug

Its a problem for society not for me. You refuse to pick up on the obvious, so I'm done conversing with you.

I refuse to pick up on what you deem to be obvious. There is nothing wrong casual encounters (outside of the risk, obviously). Their effect on "society" takes a back seat to individual choice.

[Matchles]

Not going to vote because I don't get first dates anymore after 13ish years of marriage. Missed out on the whole online dating thing (luckily). But I'd say you do you. Read the situation instead of having a rule. I'd advise against waiting till marriage because that would be a hell of a time to find out you don't have chemistry in the bedroom.

[Pannonian]

Wouldn't it depend mostly on what you're looking for?

If you look for sex (on both sides) that's obviously what you're doing - especially in online dating.

Or are you looking for a relationship? In this case everyone will have different feelings, but personally on the first date it would be kinda awkward in my opinion. Though to be honest, each relation i had was different also in this regard, so would depend on the case i guess.

[Freighter]

Nope. They assume you are because of a cultural stereotype. That you can't distinguish this difference; or that you misuse "racist", is on you. /shrug

No, they don't even know my culture at the point they do that stuff, so it is racial.

[Mistame]

No, they don't even know my culture at the point they do that stuff, so it is racial.

It's based on the culture represented in media, etc, a lot of which derives from... Wait for it... Asia! Sorry, but you're just wrong. /shrug

[Kazlofski]

It heavily depends on people, I am a guy and I'd never have sex on the first date, no chance in hell.
It takes time to get to know the person and realize if you are just attracted physically or you actually enjoy being with the person and communicate, bond together and such.
I personally am against having sex quickly and throwing away, rather realize beforehand if the person is worth the investment or not, hopefully the other side thinks the same way.

[Freighter]

It's based on the culture represented in media, etc, a lot of which derives from... Wait for it... Asia! Sorry, but you're just wrong. /shrug

On what culture represented in media exactly? Asian culture? Please. Asian countries differ from each other culturally and even then in countries like China there can be massive cultural differences between different regions within the country. Guangdong isn't like xinjiang despite being in the same country.

They're racially stereotyping, not culture because they don't know someones culture just by looking at them.

[Deleted]

Bet you haven't even had sex.

I mean, I don't really feel the need to try and prove anything here - so if that is what you want to believe, okay, I guess? Not sure what else to say.

[BigSarge04]

I had sex on a first date, we were together for about 2.5 years, and then it just fizzled out.