I will never really understand this rationale.
If someone looks at Trump, his rhetoric, his results and his positions and says "yes, I want to be governed by this man", then that is on them. It is not somehow the fault of the other candidate for failing to convince that person. Anyone who can look at Trump, as a whole, and still steadfastly holds to him will do so no matter what.
Because, well, that is what defines a die hard fan, as you noted.
That Audi fan will buy the Audi. Nothing more. If someone is a die hard fan of something, they are not going to be swayed from that position - especially not by something fundamentally different. That's where the comparison falls flat anyway, since BMW and Audi are fairly similar. If it had to be cars, it's better to compare, say, a big, masculine jeep to an economical e-car. If someone is looking for a jeep, you will just never convince him to buy an e-car. You might convince him to buy a different kind/brand of jeep, maybe. But not an e-car. The only way you can convince him to buy your product is by changing your production from e-cars to jeeps. I.e. for Biden to become more like Trump, to act just like the latter does.
Could Dems afford to lose some haughtiness and stuff? Certainly. But what exactly could Obama have said, standing on the podium, to convince a true Trump fan of voting for Biden instead? Or even just a person who votes R on principle, who identifies more with that party's position and policy?
Just about nothing. Because those die hard fans are not swayed by words, by messaging alone. The only way to capture their votes is to become more like that which they were already voting for. But that, in turn, risks alienating the voters you already have. Every step towards becoming Republicans will only widen the already existing gap in the Democratic Party.
The problem is with how divided the American people are, less with how the campaigns are run. And fixing that will require both parties to make an effort. If only one does so, it ends up being little more than appeasement.
So what are the bets on Trump pardoning himself vs trying to get Pence to do it?
He will survive all these legal challenges, he will have all the $$ and lawyers in the world to take care of this.
He will push through his family to the higher positions in Republican party too, that's a given too. His fans and Republican Party will give them a hand, the fans because fans and party because he can demolish them if he'd compromise these fans.
What exactly leads you to say democrats are haughty and what do you mean it requires both parties working together?
"working together" will neve happen. We know republicans don't give a shit about "working together" over 230k people are dead and they do not give 1 single fuck about "working together" in fact Mitch and all his backers have planned to hold up everything so Biden's approval goes down as people suffering, die, and become homeless due to their inaction. So this myth of "democratic haughtiness and working together"... is just that.
GOP has a mission critical interest to make sure he's there with them for 2022 and 2024. Don't underestimate the $$ ex-President, especially one like Trump, can amass if needed. Influence is a huge asset. If he needs it, he will have donations spiking through the roof to "fight the crooked system".
Yes, every time Dems tried to work with the GOP, they got burned. Hell, look at ACB. This went against every thing the GOP claimed they believed when appointing justices. The GOP will cry, complain and scream that they are treated unfairly but when they have the advantage, they will ignore and refuse to work with the Dems.